Personal Lolcows -

An Sionnach Seang

Justin Bieber shit's like a cat!
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So he was buying the cards (that have been around since 2015) weeks, maybe even months ahead of the launch date. But just the blind packs instead of individual cards, or even working out trading with someone. Dude is lucky he's decently smart with math because he sounds dumb as dirt in every other way. Even kids know how to trade cards with each other (or even rip off other kids).
he has a severe lack of common sense and initiative; whether that's due to his autism and/or being babied, or a mixture of both, is anyone's guess
 
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TheImportantFart

The Farter
True & Honest Fan
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he has a severe lack of common sense and initiative; whether that's due to his autism and/or being babied, or a mixture of both, is anyone's guess
I'm seriously loving the stories about Rocket Man. There are some characters in our own accounts department who have some... issues, but nothing on that level. Can't wait to hear more.
 

Stasi

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I've never spoken to this man but my downstairs neighbor in the apartment block is, if not a lolcow, at least a fucking weirdo degenerate.

He regularly gets high and trips the fuck out. I don't know what on but whatever it is does not agree with him clearly. He will pace his apartment up and down at like 1 in the morning incoherently mumbling to himself and occasionally shrieking incomprehensible garbage. At first I though he was some crazy schitzo but seen him around a few times and during the day he is a normal dude so I'm convinced he gets high and can't handle the trip.

In the summer when everyone's windows are open I can also her him jacking off. Prick has no understanding of what headphones are and also grunts loudly while beating his meat with the occasional 'ohhh baby yeahh'. Who the fuck does that while watching porn?

We recently had a new family move in on his floor and I guess they play music or watch TV and he can hear them through the walls so he starts banging the walls and screming 'turn that shit off'. This is at like 8pm maybe, a perfectly reasonable time to play music or whatever. Meanwhile this prick will routinely freak out at 1am.

Dis nigga has no self-awareness.
 

orderofcringe

Bad at english
kiwifarms.net
I have this Autist on facebook that keeps picking a fight with everyone in his life, then post status-updates wondering why everyone hates him. Sometimes some overly-understanding soul tries to help him by giving him kind words and advice, and he always snaps at them and shoots them down and showers them with insults.

He also makes post about everyone hating him for his autism. Sometimes he makes a political post, or a post over some show he likes, and if someone disagrees, saying they do not like the show, he will attack them relentlessly, making like 10 posts about how that person is an asshole.

Sometimes when he makes an angry or self-pitying post, someone makes a comment like: You are great, we are here for you ect. And he will respond with pointing out their spelling errors.

He is also on a love-quest. He has messaged me, and all my co-workers and basicly everyone he can find on FB, inquring about them being boyfreind-free. If you fail to respond, or dont ask him questions back, he will go on a tantrum, demanding that you ask him if he is girlfreind-free, how tall he is, what his hobbies are ect.

I wish i could show screenshots, but he does not post anything in english.
 

Mr E. Grifter

Suits me.
kiwifarms.net
Currently my favourite personal Lolcow is a man by the name of Derek "Decca" Heggie, an ex-bareknuckle boxing champion, now a Z-list movie "star", sex pest, mental health "Patron" and seemingly after being under lockdown for two weeks he has become an increasingly paranoid conspiracy nut. Whether this is due to not being able to access any gear, or because of cabin fever the descent into madness has been rapid and hilarious.

Due to his behaviour he has garnered a fairly sizeable following of detractors who watch his every move - which drives him nuts. With that said, they are almost as bad as he is in terms of over the top drama. So far there have been gypsy style call out videos, restraining orders, court appearances and someone ended up in jail for a short time for making threats. Most of the drama is caused by his behaviour around women - allegedly abusive and controlling, although lost of the accusations have been lost to the Facebook memory hole - the multitude of leaked dick pics and embarrassed voice messages speak for themselves though.

He has got a record, although he denies it and often responds by citing a DBS check as proof this never happened.

Bouncer Fondles Girl.jpg


I have been trying to save what I can, but this has been a recent effort and due to this being mainly on Facebook some of the old detractor pages got closed for bullying. I am considering making a thread now I have so much spare time.

That said I am not sure if he is "internet" enough, that said between the sexual harassment, nudes leaking and weird detractors there might be something here. Especially if he keeps up the conspiracy posting.

CONSPIRACY7.jpg

Anyway, here is a little snippet of the voicemails that constantly get leaked.
 
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Big Nasty

ASSHOLE
kiwifarms.net
I have this Autist on facebook that keeps picking a fight with everyone in his life, then post status-updates wondering why everyone hates him. Sometimes some overly-understanding soul tries to help him by giving him kind words and advice, and he always snaps at them and shoots them down and showers them with insults.

He also makes post about everyone hating him for his autism. Sometimes he makes a political post, or a post over some show he likes, and if someone disagrees, saying they do not like the show, he will attack them relentlessly, making like 10 posts about how that person is an asshole.

Sometimes when he makes an angry or self-pitying post, someone makes a comment like: You are great, we are here for you ect. And he will respond with pointing out their spelling errors.

He is also on a love-quest. He has messaged me, and all my co-workers and basicly everyone he can find on FB, inquring about them being boyfreind-free. If you fail to respond, or dont ask him questions back, he will go on a tantrum, demanding that you ask him if he is girlfreind-free, how tall he is, what his hobbies are ect.

I wish i could show screenshots, but he does not post anything in english.
This is literally every poster on the Swedish Flashback forum.
 

Mr Himmler

Reichsminister für Arschlochbilder
kiwifarms.net
Anthony fantano certainly isn’t only a personal lolcow, but his incessant need to shove his shitty opinions down the throats of his fans on social media is just gross. On top of his shitty takes no one wanted, he retweets and follows a bunch of lefties on his social media. He posts PARAGRAPHS of fucking text on his instagram about bullshit no one wants to hear about usually under a slideshow of him making goofy faces and article screenshots. This man blows so much hot air up his own ass regarding both his musical and political tastes someone should resurrect Zeppelin and find a way to utilize him for something other being a fucking snob.

If you’re unfamiliar with him, he started YouTube reviewing music in the most unaware snobby way possible. The dude thinks his opinions are fucking gold or something. These days he uses his platform as a fucking soapbox for his equally snobbish political views. Its like he doesn’t understand how to separate his brand, theneedledrop, from himself, a stuck-up asshole who thinks he knows everything. Oh yeah he’s also a vegan and sprinkles in rants about that in his videos. I’m surprised no one has made a lolcow thread about him before.
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GOOFY FACE = FUNNY LOOOOLLLL XD
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Chaos Theorist

It would be spiteful To put jellyfish in a trifle
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Anthony fantano certainly isn’t only a personal lolcow, but his incessant need to shove his shitty opinions down the throats of his fans on social media is just gross. On top of his shitty takes no one wanted, he retweets and follows a bunch of lefties on his social media. He posts PARAGRAPHS of fucking text on his instagram about bullshit no one wants to hear about usually under a slideshow of him making goofy faces and article screenshots. This man blows so much hot air up his own ass regarding both his musical and political tastes someone should resurrect Zeppelin and find a way to utilize him for something other being a fucking snob.

If you’re unfamiliar with him, he started YouTube reviewing music in the most unaware snobby way possible. The dude thinks his opinions are fucking gold or something. These days he uses his platform as a fucking soapbox for his equally snobbish political views. Its like he doesn’t understand how to separate his brand, theneedledrop, from himself, a stuck-up asshole who thinks he knows everything. Oh yeah he’s also a vegan and sprinkles in rants about that in his videos. I’m surprised no one has made a lolcow thread about him before.
Man has opinions I disagree with so it makes him a lolcow

hmmmmm
 

Mr Himmler

Reichsminister für Arschlochbilder
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Man has opinions I disagree with so it makes him a lolcow

hmmmmm
No, thats not the reason. The reason is that he is a snob. Lefties are a dime a dozen, but Fantano is particularly snobbish about everything he says. I could have very well picked out his reviews and shown how much he’s up his own ass about himself.
 

Argh My Cigar

Knoxville World's Fair 1983
True & Honest Fan
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A couple of weeks pass and P hurts herself on the job. P tells me how fucking weird it was that B kept insisting she give him her house keys so he could go wake up her children. Of course, P said no.
How in the everlasting fuck did she not quit on the spot? I understand being between a rock and a hard place as far as paying the bills is concerned, but jesus fuck. I would’ve bailed the moment the neighbor informed me that they were a sex offender.

Your friend seems like a pretty tolerant person to be able to put up with that sort of client.
 

Sailor Mars

your average weeb
kiwifarms.net
How in the everlasting fuck did she not quit on the spot? I understand being between a rock and a hard place as far as paying the bills is concerned, but jesus fuck. I would’ve bailed the moment the neighbor informed me that they were a sex offender.

Your friend seems like a pretty tolerant person to be able to put up with that sort of client.
Well, she likes to think positively and she felt bad for her client (his wife was her client, not the sex offender).
 

KingFrampt

The scourge of man
kiwifarms.net
There's this guy call Suicide Sux (real name Cornell something) that I like to check in on every now and then, he doesn't do anything particularly funny but he goes on long completely incoherent rants on YouTube when hes off his meds, he served 5 years in prison for beating the fuck out of someone when he was a teenager (he explains everything here https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6AzrG72pgBU)

Summary
  1. His son overdosed / killed himself, he blames himself for it and says hes an accessory to murder
  2. He claims to be gay, which is kinda confusing cause he was dating a transgender 'woman'
  3. He has bipolar but refuses to take the meds
  4. His transgender wife/husband/whatever was arrested shortly after their wedding date because they were an illegal immigrant(?)
  5. He goes on huge sprees of uploading vids while hes off his meds, uploading as many as 100 videos in just a few days, he usually deletes em though so you gotta act fast.
  6. He has a vendetta against some random judge
He hasn't uploaded in awhile, not sure if he's changed YouTube accounts, got help or worse. Just wanted to put this here cause he's super unknown (though, I guess theres a lot of crazies on YouTube)

[edit]

Facebook | Archive
Eviction Notice | Archive

Apparently police got a warrant on his house for the constant harassment so that's probably why he doesn't upload anymore, date checks out
 
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Nekoi.Inukuma.00

just a d00d
kiwifarms.net
I've got two in particular that stick out: First one just suffers from massive TDS. There's other reasons he's exceptional, but what I really want to cover is the other personal cow(s). A whole community that probably deserves a spot in the dead ass LARP community thread, if this Facebook group doesn't deserve a thread on its own. There's reasons, aside from economic ones, I don't go to events anymore. This is one of them.

So, there's this Facebook group for discussions around Live Action RolePlay (LARP). I used to know at least one of the original founders, but many of the original admins fucked right off as the place spiraled into having the reputation of being probably the worst LARP community on the internet. Considering the cultures of many of the games I've played, that's saying a lot. Let me tell ya about LARP Haven.

Most of it is pretty boring, costuming and prop construction posts, LARP stories, memes, event announcements, buy/sell and other shilling, etc. However, probably once a week there is *some* kind of dust up around social justice related topics that turns into an utter dumpster fire. Last week it was that viral twitter post about racist tropes in D&D Orcs.

If it's not SJW BS, it's something like "parlor LARP vs boffer LARP" or "Euro-LARP vs American-style LARP"... fuck, I think I saw a "lightest-touch vs full-contact combat" thread this week. Sometimes there is some genuine drama with one game or another, like the time someone thought a game based The Handmaiden's Tale would make a good feminist LARP. Or the drama around a $500/ticket LARP organizer going bankrupt because it turned out no one wants to go to one of your events when one of your writers turns out to be a creeper. Seriously, reading this group is that stupid sometimes. Oh and goddamn LARP YouTubers.

There are a couple of third rails in the group, like believing "drow makeup is not blackface"; that opinion will get ya a ban. Using "the G---- word", as in "thieving wee gypsies"... that's a ban. I think any "LARP requires costuming" memes are unwelcome for being non-inclusive, even though this is the group that meme was coined in... and I think the guy who coined that meme is still banned from the group.

Needless to say, the place isn't always a dumpster fire... but when it is, you'd better bring a lot of popcorn. The theadnaughts in there have thoroughly convinced me that Facebook is an absolutely shittily designed website for shitty people.
 

Massively Strong Greed

Thanks for the money, dummy!
kiwifarms.net
Got another story; I’ve brought this guy up before in the Mr. Enter thread, but whatever.
This guy used to be friends with one of my friends for a while. One day, the two are playing GTA Online, my friend angrily shouts “I’m gonna kill you” within the context of the game. I shit you not, the lolcow proceeds to take my friend to court and my friend gets put on probation because the lolcow was just so TRIGGERED. As such, they no longer associate with each other.
 
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