Phil's Brother Facts Thread -

[drtoboggan]

People fear shark bites. Sharks fear Phil's brother's bites.

 

[Zeorus]

(I'd copypasta all the ones people posted in the original thread, but I'm on my phone.)

Phil's brother invented a lightweight bicycle design for beginning riders.

 

[kobebyarlant]

What would Phil's brother do if he were here today? I'm sure he'd kick an ass or two. That's what Phil's brother would do.

 

[Yawning Asperchu]

Phil's brother is not a doughy white faggot with an attention dependency.

 

[Spooky_Scary]

Phil's Brother was the canonical winner of the first 3 Mortal Kombat tournaments

 

[Zeorus]

Phil's brother donates a small percentage of his salary to medical cannabis clinics.

 

[Trombonista]

Phil's brother is married to a trans woman and they have adopted five Latino kids.

 

[Zeorus]

Phil's brother is fluent in English, Italian, Spanish, and Hebrew. He's learning Arabic so he can travel to the West Bank as a peace negotiator.

 

[drtoboggan]

Phil's brother is a decent human being and would never assault or libel his parents.

 

[ln18]

Phil's brother ain't no joke, son.

 

[The Dude]

Phil's brother once took an epic shit, but he forgot to flush. The turd climbed out of the bowl, dressed up like a retarded BDSM gimp, and then he moved to the West Coast to live under a bridge and bitch on Facebook about white cis people.

 

[Morbid Boredom]

Phil's brother would never feel the need to show up a bunch of weirdos on the internet.

 

[TheEnforcer]

Phil's brother published a peace declaration with the Kiwi Farms.

 

[Yawning Asperchu]

Phil's brother once took an epic shit, but he forgot to flush. The turd climbed out of the bowl, dressed up like a retarded BDSM gimp, and then he moved to the West Coast to live under a bridge and bitch on Facebook about white cis people.

"You're telling me that I'm the leftover crap?"

(Pictured, L to R; Phil's brother, Phil.)

 

[Admiral Piett]

Phils brother is actually a rabbi who is currently undertaken a masters degree in International Relations, in the hope that he can become a diplomat in Latin America.

 

[Peace and Harmony]

Phil's brother is a contributing member of society.

 

[Yawning Asperchu]

Phils brother is actually a rabbi who is currently undertaken a masters degree in International Relations, in the hope that he can become a diplomat in Latin America.

Phil's brother doesn't hope to earn a prestigious job. Prestigious jobs need to earn his employment.

 

[The Dude]

Phil's Brother is the reincarnation of Che Guevara. Phil is the reincarnation of Batista.

 

[chimpburgers]

Phil's brother is a successful venture capitalist who lives in Argentina.

 

[Tranhuviya]

Phil's Brother is a devout Muslim.