Popular questions I’m finally answering 1/7/2020 - Let me guess, nothing of value gets addressed

Diet Coke 4 Life

When I peek, it is in the line of duty.
Do I weigh more than 600 lbs?

(insert a string of crying/laughing emoji here) ummmmmm???

Let’s see what happens here.

I don’t want to bother time-stamping this shit, so I ain't gonna.

Thinks she may have the flu because she feels like shit. Wah wah wah. Says she may have gotten sick when she went to the movies. They saw the new Grudge and she said nobody liked it. Whatever. On to the Q&A!!

Q: do you like conspiracies and would you do a video on your favorites
A: loves conspiracies, jokes among her friends about her being a conspiracy dork. Won’t do a video because she’s a fucking kook and knows she’ll get made fun of from here to the ends of the (flat) earth.

Q: does it upset you that Eric films you when you don’t want to be filmed
A: I don’t care u dum hadyrs reeeeeee (your face speaks more than your words)

Q: do you believe in God/Jesus
A: I’m agnostic

Q: why do you hang out with Destiny? Would you want to hang out with Becky’s ex?
A: Hur hur I do that all the time and it doesn’t bother me and Becky trusts me and she trusts Destiny and we’re all friends lolz

Q: have you ever self harmed? Do you have advice for people going through those urges?
A: I have back in high school and had to go to a mental hospital. (She continues to do it by eating 6000+ calories a day) Advice is to talk to someone.

Q: If you could only achieve one resolution which would it be
A: weightless

Q: do you wet the toothbrush before or after you put the toothpaste on (assuming our gorl does hygiene lolz)

Q: what will be your 2020 upload schedule
A: I don’t have one because I know I fail at everything

Q: why do you always ignore the advice left in the comments of your videos
A: I don’t ignore it, it’s just a lot of advice and it’s alway contradicting and it’s all different and my brain can’t figure out what the fuck to make of it and blah blah blah fucking dumb gah (this is ad libbed now)

Q: why won’t you admit you’re 600+ pounds
A: why would I admit to something that’s not true? (FUCKING CALLED IT.)

Q: why do you keep deleting your Twitter
A: Haaaaaydurs

Q: why did you say all December that you lost weight then claimed you maintained in a recent vlog?
A: I lost a lot of weight in November but only lost 2.8 in December which to me is a maintain, only lost ounces per each day. (Actually what she means to say is “I gained and I’m a lah”)

Q: what have you done to change your bad habits this year? Have you stuck to your resolutions?
A: I’m sticking to my resolutions! What bad habits? LOL Just putting herself in the right mainframe? Alright, AL.

Q: do you purposely make your audience mad at you when you make your videos

Q: why won’t you get health insurance instead of Torid hauls that don’t fit
A: My torid hauls are starting to fit a lot better! I can do both! (BUT YOU HAVEN’T YOU DENSE CUNTKNUCKLE! FUUUUUCK YOOOOOOU.)
**taking a moment to breath and collect top hats**

Q: what kind of foods do you crave when you’re on a diet/eating healthy
A: doesn’t want to go into detail about what she’s currently doing. When way too restrictive, craved super salty or super sweet shit

Q: any plans for doing a ‘Plan with Me’ video?
A: HIGHLY REQUESTED but a lot of people might hate it so idk

Q: is Becky doing better?
A: she has done a 360. (YOU STUPID *blathering* IT’S A FUCKING 180. Apparently Becky’s off her meds that were turning her into a zombie. We’ll see.)

Q: 5 things you like about yourself?
A: (INSERT LIES HERE) Giving, empath, sense of humor, caring and willing to help people in her means, not close minded (you fucking hadyrs) because she loves debating and will never downgrade (degrade, fucker) someone’s opinion (your entire Twitter and snapchat argue with you, AL. There’s a thread here on it)

Q: do days where you have too much of the wrong food upset your stomach
A: Yup. Claims she can’t finish an entire pint of Ben & Jerry’s ice cream by herself anymore (only finished 3/4 of it). BS meter is pegged.

Q: what is your plan to lose weight? Are you going to work out?
A: Fuck working out. Going to just move a little more. Plan to lose weight is being kept private. (*checks time. Sobs. Keeps going because of self hatred*) Refuses kept because it’s not sustainable for her as a person. Claims what she’s doing is working for her, boo boo. Weightloss Tic Tok people are being watched. Is watching a fellow fatass who is liveeen like her. Gripes about the comments on his food in his videos forever. Shut the fuck up, AL.

Q: it shocks me how different you acted in your old videos, 2015-ish. Does it shock you?
A: Nope. Lived with GF an GFs parents and didn’t want to be overheard due to embarrassment. Says her personality was just being suppressed. Whatever.

Q: do you recognize the cycle people are talking about or do you think they’re making it up

A: I 100% recognize it. (Callout, @pecansandies ! Congrats)

Q: thoughts on the new L word
A: Love love love. Doesn’t want to give anything away

Q: your BMI is over 100, why don’t you start to lose weight instead of being proud of maintaining
A: I’ve lost weight you haydur SOB. I am not currently maintaining. My BMI used to be 101 and it no longer is

Q: what’s one thing you wish you could get people to understand
A: the things people say I’m lying about I’m not lying about (I would like to waggle reference video you made about your lies right here, AL)

Q: are you doing IF for your weight loss and how are you feeling lately
A: Yup I’m doing I F. Feeling sick

Q: do you like Melanie Martinez
A: Love

Q: what do you think the reason is for your weight gain these last few years
A: freedom, money, binging got worse, depression, heartbreak and finding love (aka life)

Q: why do you think you can make this change by yourself
A: I don’t. I just need to want it enough and if I do I won’t need help because I’m delusional.

Q: do you actually read your youtube comments
A: every now and again but they’re always the same waaaaah

Q: why don’t you wear shorts
A: I don’t want to show my laaaaygs at all.

There. Enjoy, bitches.
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Ann Berlin

> ____ .
Why won't you admit to being over 600 lbs?
"I won't admit to something that isn't true"
I know her narc brain can't see any number higher than 574.poop but that sentence neither confirmed nor denied it. There's hope

EDIT: one more thing, she mentions Becky has done "a complete 360" in regards to getting better fucking lel


Point Blank Period
True & Honest Fan
So many gems in this video.

Amberlynn's two favorite things about herself is giving and empathy. She loves helping people solving math problems.

First off, Narclynn in full effect with her puffing herself up about her giving.
Second, Who the fuck is asking Amberlynn for help with math problems?


a list of things about this video:
  • about her party: "i had no idea... if i did, that makes me a great actress!" amberlynn, you looked directly at the camera and AT THE VERY LEAST saw the decorations. if you genuinely weren't expecting it you probably wouldn't have put your bags down - you would have been shocked. you could probably smell the cake from outside, which is why you waddled as fast as you could through the door.
  • she claims not to care that she's in eric's videos, but when she IS featured in them she makes the segment featuring her all about herself. she demands to be the center of attention. remember when you and becky played the newlywed game with eric and ricky and you spent the entire video trying to act goofy for attention?
  • "if i didn't want to be on camera he would respect that and not film me" - so can you extend that respect to others yourself? there's been so many videos where people have asked you not to film them, or asked to be edited out, you've filmed others' children without consent, who the fuck are you to demand that you not be filmed if you don't want to be?
fucking hell. only 4 minutes in and she's already lying.

DefCon Dumb

Confronter of Cryptoid Cuntiness
First, I hereby nominate Diet Coke 4 Life for the stupendous honour of Commander of the Order of the Orange Chicken - brilliant summary with enough snark/sarcasm/humour to allow me not to hurl. Ceremony next Friday; do wear clothes if you're showing up. Sanity is optional but let me know in advance if restraints will be required.

Boo-boo needs to change a lot more than her... 'attitude' to lose the large amount of weight she needs to lose over the next few years. Which she won't do because her attitude hasn't changed. She's still being evasive about her actual weight & how she's "moving more" & eating plan. Of course she doesn't NEED anybody with any expertise in the appropriate fields to advise her. And all that terribly conflicting online advice in her comments? The crux of what people are saying - eat less & move more isn't the least bit conflicting. But what do I know? Unlike Ms. Reid, I have not earned a BSh in any field slightly related to nutrition or exercise.

Wise choice not to film a "Plan With Me" video. She'd ruin several journals planning utterly fictitious adult type happenings & if she were to openly journal her poetry, day dreams & writing her name as 'AmberLynn Cyrus' in different colours over & over, she'd never hear the end of it.

She legit has a head cold & personally I wouldn't have filmed anything with that much talking - her throat sounds pretty raw. I wouldn't be surprised if she ended up with strep throat or pneumonia; she spoke of her UTI as still being around a few days ago & regardless of current infections, her immune system is trashed. She doesn't not have the flu.