Quinton Reviews / Quinton Kyle Hoover / Q_Review / OttselSpy24 / OttselSpy25 - What would happen if MovieBob was younger, a chaser, had a gay lisp and was obsessed with Garfield

Is Quinton able to redeem himself?

  • YASS QUEEN SLAY

    Votes: 199 14.0%
  • Not without Caleb

    Votes: 210 14.8%
  • Only inside a bouncy castle

    Votes: 596 41.9%
  • After his love quest is over

    Votes: 420 29.5%
  • With the love of a true and honest whaman

    Votes: 371 26.1%

  • Total voters
    1,422

Mal.0

You wouldn't fuck an app, would you?
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Quin-Ton is having his doubts about what has to be his biggest project yet.
View attachment 1937590View attachment 1937591View attachment 1937593View attachment 1937595


View attachment 1937596

My personal takes:
1. Quinton realises he needs to release an absolute banger so he can asure his bouncy castle is free from the party poopers that noticed he is a DM creep.
2. Quinton is somehow spending/planning to spend more money than what he currently has and needs to upload to put his finances back in green. Even if he went back to live with his parents Q is an expert in burning money.
3. Quinton realised too late he is reviewing fucking iCarly in depth and he can't chicken out because he held his audience hostage for it. Just for that you can tell this project has no hope of being anything close to Salty's iCarly speedrun or LS Mark's Mega Simpsons review, a 6-hour long video that made 1M views in a week. Q has being oblivious as of how futile it is to try to marry his own style of reviewing with the hyper-ironic style of his contemporaries. Why the fuck you need 5 videos to explain iCarly?

My bet goes on that he is going to milk it to the point he kills the meme. He likely is going to review every episode, he is going to recycle his arguments from Fallen Titans on it, he is going to try to make a video politicising it, he is going to speedrun all the games he bought and read all the novelisations. I will be surprised if there is a fucking fandom by the moment he is done.
Five sheckles says he wants to make a Comprehensive History of iCarly in the same vein as GenoSamuel's Chris Chan documentary, but that little voice in the back of his head is telling him that

A. Nobody wants an in depth review of Dan Schneider's Teenage Foot Porn iCarly
B. He has a voice that people don't want to spend more than half an hour listening to
C. He doesn't have the writing ability to make valid points or cover iCarly in a way people would care about
D. Cost-benefit analysis says that it isn't worth the time for how well it would do on youtube
E. He's fat

In which case, man he should listen to that little voice some more, it has way better ideas than he does, and also he's trying to figure how to weasel his way out of the video project.
 

Glade Candles

Keeping the flame of gratitude lit.
kiwifarms.net
Classic case of biting off more than he could chew. The goal he promised was a review of the series. Even if he made a breakdown as autistic as Linkara does for History of Power Rangers, he could get through it in 90 minutes. But because Quinton is (now openly and shamelessly) desperate for attention and validation, he had the make it the biggest and bestest review of a children's TV show ever. So he bought the games and the books and the merch (I'm sure he didn't hate the dopamine hit he gets from consooming ).

Maybe he thinks if he gets a million-views-in-a-week hit of a video, Sarah Z and Lindsay Ellis will forgive him for being a creepy, desperate weirdo.
 

Glade Candles

Keeping the flame of gratitude lit.
kiwifarms.net
Was scrolling through his Patreon and saw this:

1613883062614.png


Quinton's paypigs get the honor of editing his scripts for him.

archive of his Patreon: https://archive.md/wip/ScLmq
 

Mal.0

You wouldn't fuck an app, would you?
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
I guess everybody needs a gimmick but honestly Quinton reeks of identity crisis.
How can you attack capitalism while indulging in it yourself or looking at "neolibral" properties unironically
Quinton's gimmick is that he's a white nerdy kid from the Midwest with a strange obsession for things millenials will find nostalgia. Oh wait...

Entering into an oversaturated market is already bad enough, so our Q buddy here needed a schtick. Angry and reviews movies? Eh... been done. Angry and reviews games? That would require talent to play games... nah. Oh! Review obscure things! But with obscurity comes a limited fanbase, so you need to get more fans and views, and the easiest way to do that? Try to appeal to the (perceived) majority, in this case commies and troons and anyone that's left. And the further left the left goes, the more he has to pander, leading to his critiques of Brain-Go-Slow Joe.

As for the second part, it shares the same answer as the question: "Why does anyone pay for Q's Patreon"?

Autism.
 

Woke Blue Muttlema

DMs might be open, but your heart is not
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Was scrolling through his Patreon and saw this:

View attachment 1937732

Quinton's paypigs get the honor of editing his scripts for him.

archive of his Patreon: https://archive.md/wip/ScLmq
He does that a lot and rarely gets any feedback beyond "great" and "I will rather wait for the video to be done whatever". Through the history of this thread we have tempered with them in many ways, either by giving genuine criticism or by posting anti-semitic memes (not naming any names).
As always, is not Q seeking legitimate help as much as validating himself and his work.
 

X-avier cuck

kiwifarms.net
I will never understand the recent trend of Leftys trying to overanalyze shows like iCarly that were clearly made to bank off of prepubescent girls with little thought or regard.
Not only is it really sad but it's also pretty cringe-worthy to these people project their own delusions onto something relatively harmless then act like they really said something profound.
 

Glade Candles

Keeping the flame of gratitude lit.
kiwifarms.net
Not only is it really sad but it's also pretty cringe-worthy to these people project their own delusions onto something relatively harmless then act like they really said something profound.
Absolutely, especially given that he doesn't seem to have a particularly strong memory of the show or a connection to it. Q's Rankin-Bass videos were embarrassing products of their time and then-current skills, but he clearly cared about the media enough for those to be watchable.

"Guy dives into something he really liked as a kid" > "Aging man-child desperate for relevance plods through children's TV show for the benefit of no one"
 

Otis Boi

Chunky Cow man extraordinaire
kiwifarms.net
5 parts with the first being 2 hours long?!
Has Quinton ever criticised Mauler for the length of videos? Because reviewing ICarly for an extended length is more autistic than reviewing Star Wars IMO.

Fingers crossed it bombs
I think it's the fate of any video "essayist". They will eventually put out bloated overly produced videos to the point several months be needed in order to write a script.
 

AnOminous

とても可愛い
True & Honest Fan
Retired Staff
kiwifarms.net
He was probably hoping Biden would magically turn into Sanders. Quinton is of the Bernie or Bust ilk who helped get Trump elected.
The fact is that illegal immigrants have to be deported. There is sometimes some wiggle room for an amnesty like Reagan's, but in general, if you don't deport illegals you don't have a border policy at all. Every President has deported them. Every President in the future will as well.

This just goes to show what a bunch of happy horseshit all that "b-b-b-but muh chilluns in cages" nonsense was. It was about Orange Man Bad. They couldn't actually give a flying fuck about those families.
Why the fuck you need 5 videos to explain iCarly?
I assume he's a pedo of some sort and jerks himself raw to it. I don't trust any adult male who is this into anything Dan Schneider is involved in.
It's sad that Garfield has become some sort of weird leftist icon.
It's like the 2021 version of shitty Gritty memes.
 

Jack Awful

Laughs at Tards
kiwifarms.net
It's sad that Garfield has become some sort of weird leftist icon.
I see a lot of his followers with the fat cat as a pfp.
It feels incredibly forced.
It makes sense. Leftists are often obese and laze around expecting other people to give them free food and shelter despite contributing nothing to society.

They clearly identify with him.
 

Cemila Mandes

kiwifarms.net
The fact is that illegal immigrants have to be deported. There is sometimes some wiggle room for an amnesty like Reagan's, but in general, if you don't deport illegals you don't have a border policy at all. Every President has deported them. Every President in the future will as well.

This just goes to show what a bunch of happy horseshit all that "b-b-b-but muh chilluns in cages" nonsense was. It was about Orange Man Bad. They couldn't actually give a flying fuck about those families.
Quinton doesn't look at the big picture, which is typical of the Bernie or bust ilk. Allow illegal immigrants to remain in the country? They broke law and are unpunished for it. Free college? It's not free, the bill goes into everyone's taxes (in addition to probably causing private colleges to shut down). Forgive student debt? Way to screw over the people who broke their backs making sure they could afford college without loans.

It's this mindset that makes Quinton think he's shielded from criticism and is woefully unprepared when everyone doesn't take his side.
 

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