r/legaladvice - In which reddit's finest minds solve the world's weirdest legal problems

  • Despite what alcoholic retards are saying, there are no plans to shut down the Kiwi Farms.

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In any situation with potential legal ramifications, most normal people would immediately call a lawyer, maybe call some friends beforehand and mostly keep those affairs to themselves. Redditors, however, are most definitely not normal people, and in fact love broadcasting their legal drama to the world.

Enter r/legaladvice, a place where some incredible content lies once you get past the somewhat boring everyday stuff, like landlord problems or bumper accidents, so here are some examples to start things off:

A bi-polar redditor wants to know the legalities of buying and eating fucking industrial Lithium Carbonate:

upload_2018-6-22_15-49-27.png


upload_2018-6-22_15-53-8.png

https://www.reddit.com/r/legaladvice/comments/8simcl/cali_im_thinking_about_buying_and_eating/
http://archive.md/vG5BK

A redditor gets trapped in an elevator, and instead of waiting for help like a normal person and talking to his landlord or a lawyer afterwards, he decides to tell everyone about it while in the elevator:

upload_2018-6-22_15-52-24.png

https://www.reddit.com/r/legaladvice/comments/8t0c2q/philadelphia_pa_im_trapped_in_my_elevator_any/
http://archive.md/LWL2U

A legal feeder saga in 4 parts, sadly the reddit hotpocket cucks deleted the OP of the 1st one before I could archive it, but I managed to uncover it using ceddit, most of the OPs are too long to be capped, so I'll just spoiler the texts:

I: http://archive.md/JVGDG (https://www.ceddit.com/r/legaladvic...onto_canada_severely_obese_employee_has_been/)
Alright, so I know this is really bizarre and to be truthful I am totally stumped on my rights / what I can do as an employer in this case.

I run an event planning business. I have 15 employees and rent a small office space in a building with 4 other offices in related fields. Each business owner bought the building in 2005 as joint owners because our businesses intended to work together from the start and it's been wildly successful.

In 2010 I hired a woman we'll name Sarah. Sarah is a perfectly nice human being, and for years of her employment there was no issues. Full disclosure, Sarah has never been a small woman (I would estimate her weight around 230lbs when I hired her) but that was never an issue until 2016.

At the end of 2013 Sarah went through a bad divorce, and so when she met a nice guy in 2014 we were all very happy for her. She's always been a really private person, but she couldn't help herself talking about him around the office, and by the middle of 2015 they got married.

Around early 2016 was when Sarah began experiencing what she told me was health issues diagnosed by a Doctor. She began to absolutely balloon in weight over time. I never pushed further both because her health insurance isn't through my company insurance (it's through her new husband) and because my employee's health issues are none of my business. I assumed she had a thyroid disorder personally, because my mother had something similar happen at a similar age to Sarah.

Sarah keeps putting on weight, and putting on weight. Our office has stairs that lead to the main door and when Sarah could no longer properly use the stairs I paid for an elevator upgrade from our business only (we have a vintage building that had a scary older elevator) to accommodate her in 2016. I also purchased her a chair for her weight rating, a desk with more space, and have also at times been very lenient on our sick leave policy for her because I was still under the impression this was a medical issue and she'd been such a good employee for years. As a good employer I wanted to make accommodations for what I THOUGHT was an embarrassing medical issue. She did request the elevator be updated and the chair, but I offered the desk and a few extra paid days off when she said she was feeling ill.

Now is the part where this gets kind of bonkers, and a good time to mention I'm a part of our local kink community. None of my employees know this, as for my reputation locally me and my husband keep it very private. I was browsing Fetlife and came across a profile and INSTANTLY recognized Sarah. Her and her husband have a profile with MANY pictures going back to 2016 chronicling their "feeder" journey.

Sarah doesn't have a medical condition. So now I'm furious. I've spent about $9200 dollars in accommodations (elevator update, chair, desk) and another $300 in paid time off for this woman thinking she was ill, and she had done this on purpose and lied to me.

What can I do? Can I fire Sarah? I don't even want to look at her right now. If I fire her, can she file a disability complaint? Can I report this as fraud? Do I sue her?

We do have a company lawyer, however he is one vacation for the next two weeks. His partner said he may be able to look at this for me, however he is swamped and said he might not be able to get to it before our usual lawyer would be back. This is why I'm coming here, as at this point I'm considering even putting her on paid leave if I have to so I don't have to pretend like nothing is wrong for two weeks.

II: http://archive.md/6ZNL0
Edit: I've received a few messages and read a few BOLA comments saying I should out Sarah, even by doing it secretly. That is absolutely out of the question. Please stop messaging and commenting to that effect.

Hey everyone, I really didn't expect to have an update so soon, but my husband found something new last night and I just spent 2 1/2 hours on a skype call with my lawyer (while he's on vacation, bless his heart) so here we are. I'd also like to thank everyone who left comments in my last thread and helped me come around to waiting for my lawyer (even if it didn't go that way in the end). The majority of you were really kind and informative.

Also my last post was at risk for doxxing according to mods, so I'm going to be much more vague with this one on locations / website data. Mods, if you want something else changed please let me know.

So, onto this weekend's events. Lots of people were saying my best bet at this point would be gathering together the evidence of sick days lining up with photoshoots, so I brought all my work files home and started to go at it. Eventually I got too emotionally tired and started crying, and so my husband took over to do some of the match up work for me (he was already aware of what was going on, as he was present when I found Sarah and her husband's pictures online). While I had taken a bunch of screen shots I really had avoided looking at the actual pictures out of a mix of awkwardness / anger, and fixated on the dates listed more. However, at one point my husband called me over and asked me to look at a particular set.

Because of our field, my office has a large store room where we keep items used for set up. One of her picture sets had been taken in this store room over the weekend and had a title somewhere along the lines of "Naughty Work" (but not that). To give a bit of an idea of how this was even possible, my building doesn't have key locks we have a code pad system. My employees all have the codes, and it's not uncommon for any of my employees to visit the office on a weekend to do extra work or even just grab something they forgot to take home. All of that data is saved however, so I then pulled the keypad records from our server and sure enough, her code was used the day before the album was posted.

At this point I'm ashamed to say I lost it pretty hard and started screaming at the screen. It took a few hours for me to calm down, and then I called my lawyer on his personal cellphone which he said is allowable in an emergency. He picked up, I gave him a short run down and he told me to give him a half hour to finish lunch and then he'd call me right away.

I laid everything out for him (he tactfully avoided asking me how I found this profile aside from "did someone send this to you, did you have reason to look for it, or did you find it accidentally?" which was nice of him) and then asked him what we could do. My lawyer has said we have absolute cause to fire her without worrying about a rebuttal of this being because of her "condition" / weight gain, and that the best thing will be to have security at the door Monday waiting for her with everything at her desk boxed up and a formal letter of her termination.

He then suggested something I hadn't even thought about, which was needing that store room professionally cleaned (they used a plastic sheet but still...) and how to recover the cost of that from Sarah, as well as sending off a take down request for the album as my company logo is visible in at least two portions of it. He did tell me any of the accommodations I gave her without asking for a letter of disability were on me and not pursuable. At this point I'll probably just get the cost of cleaning that store room professionally, and getting rid of Sarah, which is fine with me.

My lawyer said he will be reaching out to a friend or two for help, as he's never faced anything quite like this. I told him that I could believe that, and that I was sorry to have to bring this to him. He joked that it was going to be one hell of a case study someday, and that if I need him for anything else related to this before he's back to give him a call.

As for me, I'm going to take 3 days off work after letting Sarah go to process my hurt feelings like some of you suggested. Then I'm going to have to install a full camera system in my office space, start building a new set of HR policies and look for someone to fill Sarah's position.

Again, thank you all for the advice you gave me even though I didn't end up needing it.

III: http://archive.md/vAtaF
A lot of people asked to know how it went Monday, and I am both glad and sad to say Sarah has been let go without much ado.

I went into work early Monday morning and carefully packed and wrapped all of Sarah's stuff (she had a lot of knick-knacks), deactivated her door access codes and her employee e-mail/log in, took her name off all our official stuff as an employee and then was waiting with security when Sarah showed up for work.

I handed her the letter (checked and cleared by my lawyer late sunday night) and then the security guard handed her the box of her stuff. She opened the letter and quickly read through it and I watched all the color drained from her face when she saw the date I listed for the misuse of company property. I don't want to quote the letter too heavily for privacy, but it also said that she would receive her final paycheque via mail with the $200 removed for the professional floor cleaning, and that all material produced and resulting from the misuse of company property needed to be removed from any "online or physical media within 3 days" or I would have to pursue legal action.

At this point Sarah started to cry and it absolutely broke my heart, but she didn't make any argument (she didn't even say anything at all), but just handed over her employee badge and then she went back to her car sobbing without any incident.

I went back inside and broke the news to everyone else that Sarah had been caught in the misuse of company property and I had to let her go, and that a camera system would be installed this coming Friday. Everyone was pretty shocked, but I asked them to please refrain from discussing the incident as it was a confidential employment matter and they all agreed. Most of them just wanted to make sure I was okay, as apparently I looked a mess.

I'm taking my 3 days off work now, at home with my husband and our dog. I checked her fetlife account late Monday night and the photo set taken in the office has been wiped. Someone suggested I take my account offline for a bit, so I did (since I don't use it much anyways). I have cried a lot the past couple days now that the anger has pretty much gone out. Overall I still feel terrible about everything, but I suspect that will die out over time.

Again, thanks for all the sound advice and surprisingly deep support I received here. I know most of you are in it for the craziness of the journey, but everything you did is still appreciated.

IV: http://archive.md/6IQaK
So for those of you saying this wasn't over, I'm really unhappy to say you were right. At this point I really just WISH this was over, I'm so overwhelmed and drained. Writing it all out has really helped me out, and I know you guys like knowing the ending to stories so I hope no one minds another update. Again, thanks for all of your support during this. I do read everything in BOLA, I just don't reply unless I see people really confused about something.

Now onto the update.

Saturday Sarah's husband showed up at our building after dark, broke into the entrance way and was in the process of trying to break into our offices when the police showed up and arrested him. Thankfully the cleaner was in the upstairs hallway and heard him smash the lock on the door in order to get into the initial entrance way, then hid and called the cops.

According to the police he had a gasoline canister with him and they believe his intention was arson as retaliation for us firing Sarah. They wouldn't say much besides the base facts, however from what I gather (and also what the cleaner told me afterwards) he apparently flipped out when the cops showed up and was yelling incoherently.

The police called me and had me come into the station and relay my full story. It was awful and honestly really embarrassing. At this point they said there'll need to be an arraignment (which I won't be involved in) and then most likely a trial (which I may be required to be a part of) before we know what happens to him, but that they would update me as the case moves along when they can (like if he gets out on bail, etc).

The police are charging Sarah's husband with a handful of things (breaking and entering, attempted arson, apparently assaulting an officer and a few others) however my husband said we could probably recover the damages of the busted door as well. I also got together an emergency meeting for all the building / business owners and informed them of what had gone on (just the basics on Sarah's firing, not the details) and our business offered to hire a night time security guard for the next little while, which they agreed would be prudent. I feel really terrible about this now affecting them -- all of them could've lost their livelihoods. They were really nice about everything, but I can't help feeling like crap.

I sent all of this information off to our lawyer but haven't heard back from him as he's still on vacation.

We've still not heard anything from Sarah either, though all of her social media is gone (not blocked, we checked through an account she would have no reason to block) as well as her account on the website with the fetish photos. I honestly have no idea if she had anything to do with this or not.

So that's it. I'll see if I can update when everything is wrapped up (though some of you mentioned my lawyer may have me take these posts down), but if I'm able to it probably won't be for a while while the police and courts do their thing.


Redditor's doctor calls his mother about his genital warts, and I assume before/while she made his tendies:

upload_2018-6-22_16-13-8.png

https://www.reddit.com/r/legaladvic...y_24_year_old_male_my_doctor_called_and_told/
http://archive.md/sVDYr

Furry wants to lawyer up because their former friend wants their gift fursona back :story:

upload_2018-6-22_16-15-7.png

https://old.reddit.com/r/legaladvice/comments/8ssd0u/usa_im_a_furry_someone_is_trying_to_steal_my/
http://archive.md/GVrZr

There's a lot more of those, to the point where there's a subreddit dedicated to this: r/BestofLegalAdvice. So I recommend going there and making heavy usage of ceddit in case you find content that's been deleted by the mods.

Edit (25th August 2018): @Cato made a great post on the r/legaladvice mods and their exceptional drama HERE.
 

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RadicalCentrist

kiwifarms.net
And that genital wart redditor, didn't it come down to the insurance not paying? Since well, he said his insurance company told him to gtfo after wasting it.
He implies it was a nurses mistake and then says his insurance dropped him, so who can know for sure. Though you'd think a doctor would have his minions shake people someone down, maybe this guy prefers the personal touch.

EDIT: Also that Lithium guy, it warms my heart to see someone try to stick one to the pharmaceutical industry but DIY medication is a Darwin award in the making.
 
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Maiden-TieJuan

Your roving Californialand reporter
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Reddit and their r/legal advice has given me years of amusement. I vaguely remember one that was a guy asking about how could he sue his former roommate for back rent. Turns out that the "former room mate" was his ex boyfriend, and he wanted back years worth of rent that he had paid for their apartment. Then he opened another throwaway account to ask the SAME question in a slightly different way, then another account to ask the SAME thing from his boyfriends point of view (to see if they were lying to him I guess), then again as another account as his mother claiming SHE had paid the rent and her son was suing on her behalf. They ended up connecting all the accounts and it was hilarious.

Edit:
Couldn't find that posting thread, but found my second favorite :

https://www.reddit.com/r/legaladvice/comments/14h7ac/where_can_i_find_an_attorney_for_a_medical/

Has the poster making other accounts to back himself up. And he knows it ALL.
 
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AnOminous

Really?
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Retired Staff
kiwifarms.net
He implies it was a nurses mistake and then says his insurance dropped him, so who can know for sure. Though you'd think a doctor would have his minions shake people someone down, maybe this guy prefers the personal touch.

EDIT: Also that Lithium guy, it warms my heart to see someone try to stick one to the pharmaceutical industry but DIY medication is a Darwin award in the making.
Indeed. Dosage has to be absolutely right, and you need to be given blood tests regularly to make sure it's at the proper levels. Fucking this up can nuke your kidneys or outright kill you, and that's even with pharmaceutical grade treatment done under medical supervision. As bad as taking drugs that can fuck up your mind and body is, this is one of the absolute worst to do that with. There's a reason it's not prescribed as often as it used to be.
 
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