Containment Random Chris Updates -

[Hollywood Hulk Hogan]

He's (probably) lying. Normal walking speed is around 3mph per hour. 4mph is a very fast walk to a jog (more jog for peeps like Chris). He would be covering about 6ft/1.8m per stride (distance covered by "left" and "right" steps together) at 4mph. Assuming average-ish 30in/0.75m per step, he is taking more than two steps per second. Unless his fitness level has drastically changed since he "did" a "Parkay", I don't think this is possible.

Most gyms also limit cardio time to 30-60 minutes for reasons of courtesy.

Yeah, I was thinking that, too. A 4 mph walk is a 15 minute mile, which is a pretty damn fast walk. Even 3 mph is a pretty brisk walk. Doing two hours of that would be pretty intense for most in shape people.

 

[Trilby]

From a quick search it seems the Anytime Fitness locations people have rated tend to note there are not full locker room/shower facilities, just a changing room, bathroom and a single stall shower. So this happening may not hilariously come to pass. Not to mention I doubt Chris understands the concept of changing into workout clothes and showering (in public no less) afterwards. Heh, I bet he followed that "workout" session with a sweaty, stinky trip to McDonald's.

Wouldn't doubt that. Of course I wonder if he would've liked going to a "Planet Fitness" instead (of course they have lockers/showers anyway)?

Yeah, there's no way Chris is speedwalking for 2 hours straight. This is the same guy who measures the weight of doghouses in tons; if he wasn't compulsively watching the clock, then his estimation skills would probably equate "walked until I'm tired" to "I walked for 2 hours, obviously, because that's how long i assume a fit young woman such as myself can walk". He might not even be doing it on purpose.

I wouldn't doubt if he just made it up.

It brings me no small amount of shame that I have to rate this "informative".

At least we have someone who knows.

Yeah, I was thinking that, too. A 4 mph walk is a 15 minute mile, which is a pretty damn fast walk. Even 3 mph is a pretty brisk walk. Doing two hours of that would be pretty intense for most in shape people.

In my usual walks, it takes me around nearly a half hour to do a mile on foot. I'm sure Chris can't even do that.

 

[LoveYouLongTime]

There's a gym across town from Chris that's a lot fancier with more equipment, pools, a hot tub and a sauna. Would be interesting if Chris joined that gym, or even signed up for a trial because I wonder how far Chris would push the boundaries of womanhood, especially with the sauna. They're located inside the locker rooms, because despite social etiquette being you at least wear a swimsuit, people do like to hang out in the buff.

 

[Nurse Ratchet]

He looks like an obese, autistic 70 year old woman.

Look into [edit:] @Mariposa Electrique 's crystal ball... for those of you that haven't seen..

https://kiwifarms.net/threads/susan-stone-david-l-stone-dance-of-life.30628/

 

[James Howlett]

Look into my crystal ball...

https://kiwifarms.net/threads/susan-stone-david-l-stone-dance-of-life.30628/

Holy shit, not only is that dudes behavoir unsettling, but the chris-chan similarities...i have no words.

 

[Hollywood Hulk Hogan]

There's a gym across town from Chris that's a lot fancier with more equipment, pools, a hot tub and a sauna. Would be interesting if Chris joined that gym, or even signed up for a trial because I wonder how far Chris would push the boundaries of womanhood, especially with the sauna. They're located inside the locker rooms, because despite social etiquette being you at least wear a swimsuit, people do like to hang out in the buff.

Old people at the gym take advantage of any opportunity to be naked

 

[Xanax]

He's (probably) lying. Normal walking speed is around 3mph per hour. 4mph is a very fast walk to a jog (more jog for peeps like Chris). He would be covering about 6ft/1.8m per stride (distance covered by "left" and "right" steps together) at 4mph. Assuming average-ish 30in/0.75m per step, he is taking more than two steps per second. Unless his fitness level has drastically changed since he "did" a "Parkay", I don't think this is possible.

Most gyms also limit cardio time to 30-60 minutes for reasons of courtesy.

Chris also estimated the number of Sonichu fans at around a billion, and valued his own high school graduation ring at $10,000 before changing it to $1,000. He has no idea what numbers mean.

Why exactly is Chris on this sudden fitness kick anyway?

 

[James Howlett]

Chris also estimated the number of Sonichu fans at around a billion, and valued his own high school graduation ring at $10,000 before changing it to $1,000. He has no idea what numbers mean.

Why exactly is Chris on this sudden fitness kick anyway?

I wouldnt be surprised if it has to do with a combonation of the relationsip announcement (ween) $600 from jack (ween) and bronycon (probably legit)

 

[Xanax]

I wouldnt be surprised if it has to do with a combonation of the relationsip announcement (ween) $600 from jack (ween) and bronycon (probably legit)

Chris is trying to bulk up so he can crush any trolls at BronyCon with his fists of steel

 

[Jack Z]

 

[Done]

• Dat combover.
• Same shirt as yesterday's gym picture.

 

[idosometimes]

There's a gym across town from Chris that's a lot fancier with more equipment, pools, a hot tub and a sauna. Would be interesting if Chris joined that gym, or even signed up for a trial because I wonder how far Chris would push the boundaries of womanhood, especially with the sauna. They're located inside the locker rooms, because despite social etiquette being you at least wear a swimsuit, people do like to hang out in the buff.

I doubt Chris would be a locker room problem. He would be far too self conscious with his "Ugly Growth." He might be annoying, but anyone can instantly see that he ain't quite right. An ignorant tranny-hating bigot might say she feels unsafe, but most gym people would ignore it until he got into their own personal space.

He would be a bigger problem in the men's side of things if he found out that guys masturbate for each other in the shower and suck on one another's genitals in the sauna. Damn homos!

Old people at the gym take advantage of any opportunity to be naked

 

[Trilby]

I wouldnt be surprised if it has to do with a combonation of the relationsip announcement (ween) $600 from jack (ween) and bronycon (probably legit)

Thinking of how someone told Chris to "get in touch with his feminine side" that got him on the tomgirl phase years back, I wonder how much was it the same deal where someone told Chris they did women who work out to keep fit?

 

[nvrwastetree]

There's a gym across town from Chris that's a lot fancier with more equipment, pools, a hot tub and a sauna. Would be interesting if Chris joined that gym, or even signed up for a trial because I wonder how far Chris would push the boundaries of womanhood, especially with the sauna. They're located inside the locker rooms, because despite social etiquette being you at least wear a swimsuit, people do like to hang out in the buff.

I would laugh at the inevitable pictures people would take of Chris either wearing a leotard bathing suit, or a *shudder* bikini to swim in the pool and hang out in the sauna. That is, if his ass doesn't end up drowning when he immeadiatly plummets to the bottom of the pool.

Thinking of how someone told Chris to "get in touch with his feminine side" that got him on the tomgirl phase years back, I wonder how much was it the same deal where someone told Chris they did women who work out to keep fit?

Jackie told Chris to get in touch with his feminine side.

 

[ON 190]

View attachment 430943

Beat me to it, dickass.

I still doubt Chris could even make 2 MPH. He'll waddle for 10 minutes, then take a 10 minute break, then waddle... then give up, go back to his house and tweet at whomever his current VA crush is.

(Piggers ARE going all the way this year.)

 

[Apteryx Owenii]

Chris "working out" (whatever he thinks that is) can only mean a troll or his head got too fat for his pony horn.

 

[normankrasner]

Anytime Fitness has a 7 day free trial so let's see if he's committed after a week.

(s)he'll probably forget to cancel

 

[The American Hedgehog]

Chris liked this on YouTube:

 

[James Howlett]

Chris liked this on YouTube:

View attachment 431369

His seems more sincere and self-serving (in a good way) to get fit. I wonder how long it will last and whether or not this has anything to do with getting money.

 

[The American Hedgehog]

Chris bought a new video game. $30.