Megathread Random Thoughts & Questions - ADF -


But in the stone age...!
Dear Philip,

You're white. You're the human equivalent of an unseasoned chicken wing covered in mayonnaise. You're so white that if you stepped outside on a snowy day you'd be invisible. You would be the whitest person in the room at a Weird Al concert.

We discarded your saliva sample immediately, because the people who work here didn't spend years mastering advanced genotyping software just to get the plague from opening a vial of rétard spit. However, rest assured that a saliva test is not required to determine, conclusively, that you are whiter than ghost cum.

Please don't send us anything else, as opening your package released several cockroaches into the air and we had to sterilise the entire lab. Your crude drawing of Donald Trump being guillotined by an ambiguously brown-skinned woman has been forwarded to the police.

Yours begrudgingly,

P.S. You're white.

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