• ”This is why I stick to 2D."
    "But for real though..”
  1. We are doing a very limited time run of SFW merch.

    Help fund the war effort! (F.A.Q.)

Trainwreck Raven Sparks

Discussion in 'Beauty Parlour' started by littlebiscuits, Sep 26, 2014.

Forum Guidelines

The Beauty Parlour is for women or not-women in the sphere of cosplay and the beauty industry that is not strictly limited to lolcows.

  • Hide your powerlevel. Avoid revealing intimate, embarrassing details about yourself. Declaring a post powerleveling does not magically exempt you from this rule.
  • No thirst. No one cares if you want to have sex with someone. Reporting thirst posts to mods is encouraged.
  • Be civil. Don't get angry over Lolcows. If you need to tell people you're better than someone, you're probably not.
  • No trolling plans. We are not an autistic Illuminati. Failtrolls will be ridiculed mercilessly.

@CasualSeppuku, @Broken Pussy, @Melchett

  1. Come on, you all knew a Raven thread was coming. But! in case you didn't, here is a brief background on this special lady.


    https://www.facebook.com/Goth.Boys (a facebook page she created which in retrospect is now really creepy given her relationship with teen boys.)


    Raven Sparks, ( yes that is her legal name, she's had it changed) is a 38 year old Goth who lives in NZ with her 18 year old husband, Logan. They married when Logan was just 16. And that's just the tip of the iceberg.

    Raven and her child bride met when Raven's son, Dorian brought Logan home for a playdate after school.
    Dorian is a year older than Logan. :'(


    Raven has a long history of ranting and raving over the internet, but recently she has launching into a campaign against the evil trolls who called protective services on her child bride.


    you can read all about it here, including the part about the police almost arresting her and taking her son due to her being a pedophile. I really recommend it, its quite a read.

    Also, Raven hates "poser goths" and "whores" and doesn't believe in nudity. So of course her molding page is full of naked pictures. Also, logan isn't allowed to have female friends on facebook.


    She also claims not to love her son, which is kind of sad for him, but not really surprising considering all her other craziness.


    Raven also claims to have had a long hard life of abuse, rape, and abandonment. She'll tell her story to anyone who will listen, but it's always wildly inconsistent, and of course, nothing is EVER her fault. :left:
    • Informative  x 42
    • Like  x 2
    • Disagree  x 1
    •  x 1
    • Horrifying  x 1

    littlebiscuits mean girl
    True & Honest Fan

  2. >Also, Raven [...] doesn't believe in nudity.
    So she's against nudity, but has a gallery with it?

    Also, what was the age of consent in NZ when she married him? Now it's 16, according to Wikipedia.
    • Informative Informative x 4
    #2 ToroidalBoat, Sep 26, 2014
    Last edited: Sep 26, 2014

    ToroidalBoat Token Hispanic K-Farmer Friend
    True & Honest Fan

  3. Did she throw a can of Spaghettios on her stall door?

    Otherwise 8/10 for a lolcow, she's the right kind of chubby ifuknowwhatimean
    • Agree  x 21
    • Like  x 5
    • Optimistic  x 4
    • Disagree  x 2
    • Dumb  x 1

    A-Stump Dr Robotdick

  4. Nah yo
    • Dislike Dislike x 3
    • Like Like x 1
    • Agree Agree x 1
    • Dumb Dumb x 1
    Butta Face Lopez

    True & Honest Fan

  5. [​IMG]

    Oh I forgot. This is lorelei, her baby doll. She claims to love the doll more than her actual child.
    • Informative  x 16
    • Feels  x 8
    • Like  x 1
    • Dislike  x 1
    • Horrifying  x 1

    littlebiscuits mean girl
    True & Honest Fan

  6. She looks to be a cruel hearted bitch, but she doesn't look to be lolcow material. She ain't funny.
    Side note: She is one hot goth chick.
    • Disagree  x 54
    • Agree  x 5
    • Autistic  x 5
    • Like  x 3
    • Dislike  x 1

    BellaKazza Cuter Then You

  7. As someone who knows this from personal experience, don't stick it in crazy and this bitch screams cray cray.
    • Agree Agree x 31
    • Winner Winner x 11
    • Semper Fidelis Semper Fidelis x 2
    • Like Like x 1

    Surtur Destroyer of the Universe.
    Retired Staff

  8. So she's basically the pixy people would have sex with?
    • Winner Winner x 22
    • Agree Agree x 3
    • Like Like x 1
    Count groudon

    Count groudon Saltier than Njord's left testicle

  9. [​IMG]

    I don't know about hot....but if you like goths I guess she has decent style. And yes, this is a prime example of, "never promise crazy a baby!"
    • Winner Winner x 8

    littlebiscuits mean girl
    True & Honest Fan

  10. Looks like a fair bit of photoshopping in the op pic. Someone has a lot of issues.
    • Agree Agree x 7
    • Disagree Disagree x 1

    kcbbq Are tarps Gary?

  11. You know, I'm not really seeing the hotness aspect. She's just too creepy to be remotely attractive, at least in my opinion.
    Poor kid. And poor Logan.
    • Agree Agree x 27
    • Like Like x 1
    • Disagree Disagree x 1
    Randall Fragg

    Randall Fragg Commissar of the Alt-Left
    Staff Member Moderator True & Honest Fan


  12. she actually just posted a video about how she photoshops everything...
    • Disagree Disagree x 2

    littlebiscuits mean girl
    True & Honest Fan

  13. Ugh - the look on Logan's mother's face at the 2012 Commitment Ceremony is heartbreaking. Seems she's trying to support Logan even though he's being taken hostage and making the worst decision of his life.
    • Agree Agree x 8
    • Feels Feels x 2
    • Disagree Disagree x 1
    Enjoy Yer Food


  14. 16 is under the age of consent, at least in my state. Shouldn't she be arrested for being a pedofork?
    • Like Like x 3
    • Agree Agree x 2
    • Optimistic Optimistic x 1
    Johnny Bravo

    Johnny Bravo Bravokin

  15. Bugger, I was a Goth as a teen but this is a incredible amount of crazy.

    She isn't exactly a lolcow yet, but a little nudge here a little prod there we could send her over the edge.
    But that many facial piercings is just not attractive*, one or two maybe but the ones she has just don't look right in the photos of her I have just seen.

    *= I have not got any problem with piercings on the face but I think she has really overdone them.
    • Agree Agree x 3
    • Like Like x 2

    Ravenor Purge.
    Supervisor True & Honest Fan

  16. When I was thirteen I went through a goth phase that lasted an entire school year. Thank God I grew the fuck out of it, Raven acts like an eternal teenager.
    • Agree Agree x 14
    #16 The Joker, Sep 26, 2014
    Last edited: Sep 26, 2014
    The Joker

    The Joker Does not have a girl penis

  17. She's got an american accent. How'd she end up in New Zealand?
    Edit: Watched a couple videos and read some of her stuff. It's just a constant stream of shit. I'd rather fucking shoot myself than hitch to that wagon. No wonder she had to kidnap a teenager.
    • Agree Agree x 5
    #17 Gorogoroth, Sep 26, 2014
    Last edited: Sep 26, 2014
  18. I don't know why, but I read that as the sort of person that people would have pity sex with.
    • Like Like x 3
    Pine Tar

    Pine Tar Disrespecting skeletons
    True & Honest Fan

  19. All things told, she's not too unattractive by goth and lolcow standards. The face makeup, the black clothing and the contacts look awful but I can't say I disagree with too much else about her appearance... :tomgirl:

    But that aside, this chick is definitely deserving of the Horrorcow label. Her personal life sounds insane, like way more than most people I've heard about. Why would a nearly 40 year old person marry a teenager and then brag about it on the internet? It sounds to me like she strong armed the kid into doing that too. That or the kid she married is just as dumb as her.
    • Agree Agree x 14

    Konstantinos The Sword of Atismu

  20. Some kid in NZ wanted her shit and offered to pay for her to come live with him. She agreed because she was homeless. They got married shortly thereafter but obviously it didn't last. She's been married 3-4 times I think?
    • Informative Informative x 21
    • Like Like x 1
    sea panther

    sea panther we did it reddit

  • About Us

    The Kiwi Farms is about eccentric individuals and communities on the Internet. These people are commonly referred to as Lolcows and are each distinct thanks to their erratic public behavior. Spectators are encouraged to join discussion. The wealth of opinions and knowledge shared by users is what has enabled this peculiar fringe community to thrive despite the incredible adversity and contention brought by those we discuss.

    We do not place ads, host malware, sell data, or run crypto miners with your browser. If you experience these things, you have a virus. If your malware system says otherwise, it is faulty.

  • Supporting the Forum

    BTC: 1LXpv9FUiazGB2LVyS44cTTEQFc8CBgPYi

    BTC+SW: bc1qwv5fzv9u6arksw6ytf79gfvce078vprtc0m55s

    ETH: 0xc1071c60ae27c8cc3c834e11289205f8f9c78ca5

    LTC: LNjmyhxThrTMY4izBdcdWqvW287LmCB6bg

    XMR: 438fUMciiahbYemDyww6afT1atgqK3tSTX25SEmYknpmenTR6wvXDMeco1ThX2E8gBQgm9eKd1KAtEQvKzNMFrmjJJpiino

Copyright © 2016 Lolcow LLC
This website may contain offensive or adult content.
Discontinue browsing if it is illegal or against your wishes to see such material.
All content belongs to their respective authors and does not represent Lolcow LLC.
We have not been served any secret court orders and are not under any gag orders.