Really basic things you can't do or didn't know -

RetardedCat

literally gay hitler
kiwifarms.net
I can't hold a conversation in my native tongue for more than 5 minutes without ending up using English. It's gotten to the point where my accent sounds foreign despite the fact that I grew up here, all because I use English more often.

I can't write anything with a pen that anyone else would be able to read, I sometimes end up wondering what the hell I wrote myself.

Can't shuffle cards for shit and also can't walk straight for more than a couple meters if I'm not focusing.
 

Chewy Suarez

specializes in canine couture
kiwifarms.net
My parents convinced me that if you turned those lights on the roof of the car on, you’d get arrested, and I believed it for years. I also didn’t know how to do any basic hairstyles like a ponytail until like three years ago. I never felt like learning and always had my hair down.

Not me but my friend doesn’t have the ability to picture scenarios or anything in general in his head. He unironically thought “imagine you’re in a...” was a saying, and that everyone was like him.
 
  • Like
Reactions: quatchi55

AbyssStarer

kiwifarms.net
I type with my index fingers. The typing programs I had to use when I was younger was super utilitarian and felt patronizing. I usually wound up abusing the computer because I could absolutely not type fast enough. When I switched schools they made me use these.
748245


Their computer program was better but I still couldn't type fast enough to pass the tests after a few classes so I spent the rest of 5th grade pretending to attempt the tests if we had to do the typing program.

I don't even type that slowly, I just cannot type in the home row style.
 

Kiwi Lime Pie

Tasteful in all Spring weather. 🥝
kiwifarms.net
I forgot to add, I did learn to type properly but I preferred the pecking method and used it for the majority of my formative computer years, so now as a young professional my proper typing is noticeably slow and inaccurate.
I never even managed to learn proper typing from the home position(s). It felt too forced, slow, and awkward when using a typing tutorial program in our freshman year Introduction to Computers course. So, I gave up on it and have subsequently used hunt and peck. I can be quite good at it in short bursts, but I struggle mightily on laptops and anything else with smaller than average keys.
 
  • Like
Reactions: quatchi55

Sprig of Parsley

kiwifarms.net
I could never use the L/R-buttons in SNES Street Fighter/Mortal Kombat
I found that most move inputs involving the L button were fucking stupid difficult to do with SF2Turbo. Could manage with the R button but bleh. Killer Instinct had the same issue for me, though I found that <- -> inputs there were a LOT easier to work than quarter-circles or DPs involving L. (this led to me eventually just maining Orchid overall, despite being slightly more comfortable with Jago and Fulgore on an arcade cabinet)
 
  • Like
Reactions: quatchi55

cuddle striker

please wait what is your genotype
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
My parents convinced me that if you turned those lights on the roof of the car on, you’d get arrested, and I believed it for years. I also didn’t know how to do any basic hairstyles like a ponytail until like three years ago. I never felt like learning and always had my hair down.

Not me but my friend doesn’t have the ability to picture scenarios or anything in general in his head. He unironically thought “imagine you’re in a...” was a saying, and that everyone was like him.
how does your friend survive in society? understanding metaphor and simile seems so absolutely necessary to any real communication.
 

Wendy_Carter

Shadows are black as ink, or night, or nightmares.
kiwifarms.net
I cannot explain anything to anyone in a live conversation, online or otherwise, to save my life. I am a very slow thinker, and even preparing for the conversation doesn't help much. This is a very big reason as to why I prefer to keep quiet in an environment where I cannot formulate and edit my thoughts for a very long time (games, chats, most RL situations).
 

Pargon

Drive boy, dog boy, dirty numb angel boy
kiwifarms.net
I can't draw anything beyond a stick figure of such low quality that cavemen would laugh.

I also can't fix a goddamn thing that doesn't have a motherboard. Not even something a simple as a toilet. When the global EMP hits look me up if you're hungry because serving as food for hungry cannibals is about all I'll be good for.
 
Tags
None

About Us

The Kiwi Farms is about eccentric individuals and communities on the Internet. We call them lolcows because they can be milked for amusement or laughs. Our community is bizarrely diverse and spectators are encouraged to join the discussion.

We do not place intrusive ads, host malware, sell data, or run crypto miners with your browser. If you experience these things, you have a virus. If your malware system says otherwise, it is faulty.

Supporting the Forum

How to Help

The Kiwi Farms is constantly attacked by insane people and very expensive to run. It would not be here without community support.

We are on the Brave BAT program. Consider using Brave as your Browser. It's like Chrome but doesn't tell Google what you masturbate to.

BTC: 1EiZnCKCb6Dc4biuto2gJyivwgPRM2YMEQ
BTC+SW: bc1qwv5fzv9u6arksw6ytf79gfvce078vprtc0m55s
ETH: 0xc1071c60ae27c8cc3c834e11289205f8f9c78ca5
LTC: LcDkAj4XxtoPWP5ucw75JadMcDfurwupet
BAT: 0xc1071c60Ae27C8CC3c834E11289205f8F9C78CA5
XMR: 438fUMciiahbYemDyww6afT1atgqK3tSTX25SEmYknpmenTR6wvXDMeco1ThX2E8gBQgm9eKd1KAtEQvKzNMFrmjJJpiino