Recipes/Baking Thread -

Jackie Chin

The Man, the Myth, the Legend
kiwifarms.net
I was thinking today that it would be cool if there was a thread like this. So if any of you bake or have any recipes you can share them! But I don't have any...yet.
 

Angelica Rosechu

666% Homo
kiwifarms.net
I have an almost Satanic power when it comes to baking that was inherited from my mother. I once tried to make chocolate chip cookies, only realizing halfway through that I had no oil, and substituted with corn syrup. I did not end up with cookies. What I ended up with was some sort of strange sticky combination between a scone or crumpet and some kind of biscotti. And it was delicious. Great with tea.

  • 2 1/2 cups of flour
  • 1 tsp baking soda
  • 1/2 tsp salt
  • as much vegetable oil as you have on hand plus the amount of corn syrup adding up to 1 cup
  • 1 cup brown sugar
  • 1/2 cup white sugar
  • 2 eggs
  • as much vanilla as your lil pea-pickin' heart desires
  • 1/2 grocery store's worth of chocolate chips
Preheat your oven to 350 F.
Mix up your flour, baking soda, and salt.
Mix your sugars and vanilla together in another bowl.
Begin to pour in vegetable oil.
Realize you don't have enough.
Freeze like a deer in headlights.
Contemplate the folly of man.
Let GodBear guide you and grab a bottle of corn syrup. Throw that in instead.
Beat in your eggs.
Now mix in your dry ingredients.
Stare at the unholy lumpy abberation you have wrought.
Smoosh some together like you're making mud pies and throw 'em on a pan. Make 'em big.
Bake until they're done. Twelve minutes maybe.
Let them cool, you impatient children. These are not hot pockets. Don't burn your mouth on them.
Serve with tea or hot chocolate or whatever. I don't know your life.
Explain to your mother once she gets home that you're not quite sure WHAT happened, but they taste pretty good so whatever.

Make them for friends, I don't care. Name the biggest and lumpiest one after me.
 

Grand Number of Pounds

Sonichu fan
kiwifarms.net
My mom's cocoa, marshmallow cream and peanut butter brownies:

K0H1zHm.jpg


You make whatever brownies you like, and while it's slightly warm, cover them in peanut butter and then marshmallow cream. Then you put on a layer of cocoa.

Cocoa recipe:

2 tablespoons butter
2 tablespoons cocoa
2 tablespoons water
1 cup powdered sugar
 
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MerriedxReldnahc

Sir Richard Pump-A-Loaf
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
I've been on a big lemon kick recently and I'm thinking of making lemon squares sometime (Not now though, I have so many treats in the kitchen!)

1 cup flour
1/2 cup butter
1/4 powdered sugar
2 eggs
1 cup regular sugar
1/2 tsp. baking powder
1/4 tsp. salt
2 tbsp. (or more) lemon juice

Heat the oven to 350
Mix the flour, butter, and powdered sugar together
Press the mixture into a square pan (8x8 or so) and bake it for 20 minutes.
Mix all the other crap together, and pour it over the baked crust.
Bake for another 25 minutes until it is beautiful and happy

I'd like to see what happens when I use lime juice, or a mixture of the two. Maybe mostly lemon with a bit of lime?
Also if anyone has recipes with ginger I'd like to hear one, I bought a ginger root and have no clue what to do with it!
 

fuzzypickles

True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
This might not be a recipe for desert, but here's one that I found in an Indian cookbook, and modified to my family's tastes:

Meat:
2 lbs. of steak
1 tablespoon of vegetable oil
Wooden skewers, to skewer the beef

Marinade:
4 tablespoons of minced garlic
2 tablespoons of peeled, grated ginger
1/2 teaspoon of turmeric
1/2 teaspoon of cayenne pepper
1 1/2 teaspoons of salt
4 teaspoons of Garam Masala
6 tablespoons of plain yogurt
1/2 cup of rinsed, chopped mint leaves
1 tablespoon of vegetable oil

Steps:
  • Wash your beef with cold water and cut into 1-inch cubes
  • Put your marinade ingredients into a large bowl and mix well. Add the meat and mix well. Marinate for at least 2 hours, overnight at the most.
  • Preheat the oven to 450 deg. Fahrenheit, and take out your meat mixture in the meantime. Spread your oil on the baking sheet.
  • Thread the beef evenly onto the skewers, and lay them on the sheet. Bake for 10 minutes.
  • Turn the skewers and continue baking to your desired doneness. Afterwards, serve!
I recommend serving this with a side of Rice with Cumin and Peas and a spoonful of Raita or plain yogurt. Recipes for the rice and the raita to follow. Seeing as it's summer right now, I would advise going outside and grilling your kebabs, as that will be sure to be delicious too!
 

Kamen Rider Black RX

Winner: Cole Smithey Award for Valued Opinion
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
My personal steak:
1 Steak
3-5 Strips of bacon
1 teaspoon of butter
2 slices of cheddar cheese
1 small onion
1 Jalapeno pepper
Salt
Pepper

Set your stove to medium and place 1 teaspoon of butter into frying pan. When butter is melted, add steak and bacon to the pan. During this time, slice the onion and jalepeno. Onion should be sliced into rings. Add onion and peppers to the pan.

The bacon should be cooked about the time the steak is medium rare. At this point, season the steak with pepper and salt and place the cheese on top of the steak. Add a dash of water and cover for 20 seconds. Cheese should be melted at this point.

Remove steak from pan. Top with onions, pepper and bacon. If crispy bacon is preferred, cook it before adding the steak to the pan.
 

exball

He's fat! Iiiiii'm thin!
kiwifarms.net
How I stay alive.

What you'll need:
One cheap ass cup of noodles.
One Kettle.
Basically no money.

1 Boil the kettle.
2 Pour boiling water in your noodles.
3 Wait until hydrated.
 

Mourning Dove

Zenaida macroura
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
I recently had a dream about s'more cookies or s'more brownies. It made me crave them when I woke up. I need to try this recipe. It must be destiny! *drool*
 

Pikonic

Don’t worry about the mask I’m vaccinated
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
How I stay alive.

What you'll need:
One cheap ass cup of noodles.
One Kettle.
Basically no money.

1 Boil the kettle.
2 Pour boiling water in your noodles.
3 Wait until hydrated.
I also lived on that till I was 23
 

AnimuGinger

Schmuck in Scrubs
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
I'm actually looking for cheap recipes for when I move out. Stuff to feed myself with without spending much money. I have your basic black beans and rice, burritos, fried rice, etc. I'm just wondering if you guys have any input on cheap shit I could make myself so I don't die.
 

Bugaboo

I have to kill fast and bullets too slow
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
I'm gonna troll you all by posting a recipe for crab food
tumblr_na46chke1W1tbnkw0o1_500.jpg

Crabbie Freezer Cookies AKA The Crab Turd

Ingredients:

  • Natural Peanut Butter (unsalted, unsweetened)
  • Liquid Honey (go for local honey)
  • Rolled Oats
  • Black or Brown Rice (not instant)
  • Dried Mysis Shrimp OR Dried Krill
  • Dried Bloodworms
Grind up the rice and oats in a food processor Chop up the mysis shrimp and mix all the dry ingredients together. Spoon in the peanut butter and honey mix it up a little with a spoon. Dump the mixture onto a clean cutting board and mix it together with your hands until it turns into a sort of dough like thing and then roll it into a log. Cut it with a butter knife into little cookies, place in a plastic bag and pop in the freezer until hard.

I fed it to the crabs, they loved it.
 
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