responding to comments & torrid haul 03/07/21 - LOL, She's FAT.

Hamberlard Raid

No one give that meat mountain any more money.
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
You know exactly what I am about to do.
  • Hey guyz!
  • Welcome TO me tryeen to stay relevant
  • Multitood of topicks!!
  • Like a podcast!!!
  • Watcheen podcasts!!!
  • They do theens
  • Nice to have sumtheen to listen 2!!!
  • THIS IS NOT A PODCAST
  • I AM STRUGGLING TO FORM SENTENCES
  • Bewks in February!!!!
  • I read one ☹
  • I read 24 in Januaree
  • FUCK YOU TO THOSE WHO DENY MY LITERARY CAPABILITIES AND PROFOUND KNOWLEDGE OF 16TH CENTURY FRENCH LITERATURE ABOUT EXISTENTIALISM AND CARTESIAN SKEPTICISM
  • I do not crack spines!!
  • I just crack furniture!
  • This book is about yadda yadda yadda
  • There’s like a guy
  • Like a girl too
  • THREE TWISTS
  • SHOOK
  • SHAKEN
  • SHORN
  • 5/5
  • Me and mah aunt send giffs for hollahdaze!!!
  • Started with Valentime’s
  • KYUUUUUUUUUUUUUTE
  • Card!!!!
  • Eareens!!!
  • Spatchulae with heart on it!!!
  • Cookeen with love madders!!!!
  • PENS!!!
  • Notepads!!!!
  • Clips!!!
  • Universe byuook!
  • Flip to page
  • Talkeen about makeen budjhits!
  • It says I need a reality check????
  • I been spendeen monee!!!!! (even though I claim to be very frugal when presented with pointed criticism)
  • READEEN COMMENTS!!
  • Top 3
  • I HAVE A DOCTOR’S APPOINTMENT FOR MAH PELVIC PAIN
  • “This pain was there even before I was diagnosed with cancer, so it’s not cancer” ~ Oncologistlynn, 2021
  • Scheduled a CT scan and oncologist appointment
  • Comments are making fun of her being “bare nakee” and being massively immature
  • I AM NOT AFRAID TO TALK ABOUT SEXUAL THINGS
  • DO NOT WANT TO BE DEMONITIZED
  • Hot topic dress!!!!
  • U-neek????
  • Shirt!
  • Long shirt!
  • Sleep gown!
  • Weareen moo-moos as regular clothes!
  • Torrid underwear!!!
  • Skollls!
  • I DO NOT WEAR CHILDREN’S UNDERWEAR!
  • Leave that to Sophie Labelle… (btw a much more interesting cow)
  • Watcheen Firefly Lane
  • I CRIED
  • I SHOOK
  • I had an idea!!!
  • Write byuk names on raffle tickets, put it in jar, and pull out ticket!!!
  • FUCK
  • I AM A GENIUS
  • Reading two books!!
  • One YA novel she is blitzing through
  • The other is a complex read with an abnormal page structure
  • Bit too complex for our 9-year-old protagonist
  • OOP
  • MY CAMERA FELL ☹
  • DA universe is telleen me to stop filmeen!!!
  • Bi
Loving the black and white flashback shots.
1615148209875.png
They do look familiar though.
1615148201355.png
Hamberlard review: 2/10, SKIP
Some final thoughts:
Is the aunt, Aunt Tammie?
Is she finally smartening up and producing worthwhile videos? This video is by no means watchable, but compared to previous ones, it is a step up.
Friendly reminder of what Amber considers "cooking with love":
ambertacoslop.gif

The tatertards are planning another mass unsubscribe event?
1615149343911.png

My favorite moment (this is THE perfect example of Amberlogic):
Viewers expressed concern with Amber's nonchalant attitude toward her pelvic pain: with the pelvis being the main point of concern back when she had Stage 1B, Grade 2 uterine cancer. Amber posits that this pain could not be a symptom of cancer because she has had this pain before she was diagnosed with cancer. I'm sorry, WHAT?!

"I know this pain is not from cancer, because I had it before I was diagnosed with cancer!" ~ Oncologistlynn, 2021
 
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Pippeyy

kiwifarms.net
She read one book.
Got cheap chinese crap for Valentine's day.
Has a doc appt & CT scheduled
She isn't immature in real life, only on YouTube cause demonized.
Torrid and Hot Topic shit.
Her Garfield underwear are the width of a twin size blanket, I swear.
She likes some show with people no one cares about.
There, saved you 15 minutes of absolutely nothing
 

some cunt

fan with a short attention span
kiwifarms.net
I've left this saga alone for a while but never did I expect she'd get even more boring. The heifer looks like she's bed bound and unable to do anything at all, and where the fuck is Becky? I believe the Thumb has checked out and no longer wants anything to do with this bitch, hence no more ring.
 

Babygorlwhisperer

kiwifarms.net
the more i think about it the more iam convinced, the Butler has gone.
it starts with her obvious disappearance in Ambers vids but its also:
-the missing ring
-the missing pets
-the missing earrings (how many pairs she got over Vlogmas? i lost track.)
-the empty Bedroom ( Iam sure Amber taken the Thumbquarters cause they are closer to the fridge.)
-this obscure aunt , comes up out of nowhere and gives her Valentines day presents in March? did we see a present from Becky? i dont remeber.... ( and by the way... is her aunti a retarded fat bitch herself or did she just out of chance loves the same cheap crap Amber likes to buy at Walmart? )

if Amber would not be the stupid lazy cunt she is, i would say she builds some kind of storyline already.
 

sophiexeon

kiwifarms.net
i do wish we could get back to the amount of cringe we had during the Destiny era. This is way too boring to watch, I just read up on here and in the comments section. Like, girl, at least start a new diet or something.

Also, these hauls kinda make sense in terms of ROI. She buys all these random crap, gets paid for showing it on camera, she gets back her money and maybe even get some interest on top of that.

I hope Becky did indeed leave her and we'll finally enter break up saga, maybe new characters in the future too since this gorl can't be left alone without someone to take care of her.
 

Final Gorl

kiwifarms.net
Perhaps it's a from a collective pandemic ennui, but I feel a strong undercurrent of resignation from Amberlynn (and Chantal, to some degree). It's unsettling and hard to pin down.

The absence of Becky and the pets has really showcased how utterly banal Amberlynn is. At least Chantal has a foil in Peetz; imagine Chinny without him!?

I would keep going, but this is already veering wildly into shitpost territory, and I don't want to get closer to addressing just how depressing our gorl is making me feel... yikes.
 
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