Cultcow Russell Greer / @theofficialinstaofrussellgreer - Swift-Obsessed Sex Pest, Magical Star Buddy

Biggest failure of Russell's career?

  • Rejected from America's Got Talent

    Votes: 21 7.1%
  • Suing Taylor Swift (the first time)

    Votes: 39 13.3%
  • Suing Taylor Swift (the second time)

    Votes: 44 15.0%
  • Suing Ariana Grande

    Votes: 38 12.9%
  • Failing to DMCA Kiwi Farms (any of the times)

    Votes: 42 14.3%
  • Spending $4000 to be friendzoned by a hooker at Olive Garden

    Votes: 232 78.9%
  • Making his parents sad

    Votes: 46 15.6%
  • Catfished by a I HAVE AUTISM PLEASE LAUGH AT ME

    Votes: 38 12.9%
  • "Katy Perry, You Won't Ever Have To Write Another Sad Song"

    Votes: 22 7.5%
  • "I Get You, Taylor Swift"

    Votes: 23 7.8%
  • "I Don't Get You, Taylor Swift"

    Votes: 43 14.6%
  • "Safari Ride"

    Votes: 20 6.8%
  • Stripper didn't want his flowers

    Votes: 27 9.2%

  • Total voters
    294
  • Poll closed .

Barbarella

Guards! To the Mathmos with this winged fruitcake.
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Little did he know, it was Taylor Swift in the car. She’d been driving around, looking for him all night in a horrific snowstorm. After hearing the song Russ sent to her manager, she just had to meet the man who wrote it, buy him some chocolate tard cum, and maybe even suck him some penis.

There he is! Her driver pulled over She stopped by him, but his reaction was strange. He went from a guy about to lurch across the street to a bus stop, to a shivering guy trying to hide behind a light pole. She decided to brave the snowy elements and step out of the car in her red high heels just when he whipped his phone out and started recording.

She took her hand off the door. She knew if she stepped out, paparazzi will come running, lightbulbs flashing. Plus, Russ was already recording what she hoped would be a tender and discreet moment. She doesn’t want attention for Russ’s song, all eyes should be on him alone, so sadly, she pulled back. She drove on, stopping for one, last, wistful glance at the man who could have given her a better life, A tear slipped down her cheek as she sadly whispered, “Jeeves, back to the airport please.”

Hey, it’s as plausible as anything Russ comes up with. :)
 

A Big Bumbling Black Man

never forget your vest in the gangster kitchen
kiwifarms.net
Of course it didn't cross Russ' mind that the person in the car might be lost, or in some sort of trouble. It wouldn't occur to him to ask the driver if he or she were okay and needed any help. Heaven forfend it not be all about Russ.
I would be so unlucky if I was lost somewhere and the only way to get directions would be to decipher the ramblings of a slurpy durptroll who can't stop talking about Taylor Swift.
It's probably better that Russell didn't offer any help.
 

DrJonesHat

A dashing and sophisticated young man
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Little did he know, it was Taylor Swift in the car. She’d been driving around, looking for him all night in a horrific snowstorm. After hearing the song Russ sent to her manager, she just had to meet the man who wrote it, buy him some chocolate tard cum, and maybe even suck him some penis.

There he is! Her driver pulled over She stopped by him, but his reaction was strange. He went from a guy about to lurch across the street to a bus stop, to a shivering guy trying to hide behind a light pole. She decided to brave the snowy elements and step out of the car in her red high heels just when he whipped his phone out and started recording.

She took her hand off the door. She knew if she stepped out, paparazzi will come running, lightbulbs flashing. Plus, Russ was already recording what she hoped would be a tender and discreet moment. She doesn’t want attention for Russ’s song, all eyes should be on him alone, so sadly, she pulled back. She drove on, stopping for one, last, wistful glance at the man who could have given her a better life, A tear slipped down her cheek as she sadly whispered, “Jeeves, back to the airport please.”

Hey, it’s as plausible as anything Russ comes up with. :)
It was me. As @The Dude pointed out, we know what street that was. I was scouting for locations to set up an ambush on orders from Kiwi High Command.
All joking aside, I agree with the above poster, he's starting to lose it. How long before he discovers gang stalking and gets convinced that's what's going on?
 

SpaceAce

Disney Avatar
kiwifarms.net
Cause a brothel and Planned Parenthood is basically the same thing.

View attachment 693209
If I can't have control of a woman's body, neither should she.

How long until this is another "shock jock" quote.
This actually upsets me. I know he's said it before, but to have it just there just in a sentence like that.
I'm actually mad at the internet.
 

Russtard

I have the right to fuck 9's and 10's
kiwifarms.net
This actually upsets me. I know he's said it before, but to have it just there just in a sentence like that.
I'm actually mad at the internet.
Russhole makes it really hard not to a-log. He’s the only cow I feel genuinely disgusted by. You just have to think of him as the Milo of exceptional individuals.

How will People Magazine ever recover?
The thought of Russ Katy Perry-video crying and forming a new trauma lump over no one caring about his plights is hysterical. And he thinks moving will fix this.
 

Heckler1

kiwifarms.net
It's a pity Russ never trend to run for public office on a delusional pro-hooker (Russ' personal harem) platform. I would imagine that would make for some funny Local election news stories. Unfortuneately thats probably more work than Russ wants to do, and so he'll 'just keep making half-assed lolsuits and whining on twitter.
 

AnOminous

do you see what happens
True & Honest Fan
Retired Staff
kiwifarms.net
It's a pity Russ never trend to run for public office on a delusional pro-hooker (Russ' personal harem) platform. I would imagine that would make for some funny Local election news stories. Unfortuneately thats probably more work than Russ wants to do, and so he'll 'just keep making half-assed lolsuits and whining on twitter.
I wonder if he's given up on lolsuits. He didn't even challenge the magistrate's dismissal which is why it became final, nor did he react publicly to his humiliating defeat. And now all he is doing is chimping out on random instathots and news stories and feebly responding to people calling him out for being an asshole.
 

AbraCadaver

Member of the SUIT YOURSELF Army
kiwifarms.net
I wonder if he's given up on lolsuits. He didn't even challenge the magistrate's dismissal which is why it became final, nor did he react publicly to his humiliating defeat. And now all he is doing is chimping out on random instathots and news stories and feebly responding to people calling him out for being an asshole.
He’s probably out of money. He doesn’t even venmo dollars anymore that we can tell.
 

Bunny at Law

kiwifarms.net
I wonder if he's given up on lolsuits. He didn't even challenge the magistrate's dismissal which is why it became final, nor did he react publicly to his humiliating defeat. And now all he is doing is chimping out on random instathots and news stories and feebly responding to people calling him out for being an asshole.
This makes me kind of excited. We've watched Russ morph from a creepy Nice Guy raging at strippers/hookers to Real Stalker with Taylor and Ariana, whatever could he have in store for us now!?
 

lamp shade

Lights and plights.
kiwifarms.net
This makes me kind of excited. We've watched Russ morph from a creepy Nice Guy raging at strippers/hookers to Real Stalker with Taylor and Ariana, whatever could he have in store for us now!?
I was just looking back in the early pages for the photo of Ariana’s security guard and wow he was a very different cow in the beginning. I highly recommend any new Russtafarians go back and at least read the first couple hundred pages. The good ol’ days.
 

About Us

The Kiwi Farms is about eccentric individuals and communities on the Internet. We call them lolcows because they can be milked for amusement or laughs. Our community is bizarrely diverse and spectators are encouraged to join the discussion.

We do not place intrusive ads, host malware, sell data, or run crypto miners with your browser. If you experience these things, you have a virus. If your malware system says otherwise, it is faulty.

Supporting the Forum

How to Help

The Kiwi Farms is constantly attacked by insane people and very expensive to run. It would not be here without community support.

We are on the Brave BAT program. Consider using Brave as your Browser. It's like Chrome but doesn't tell Google what you masturbate to.

BTC: 1EiZnCKCb6Dc4biuto2gJyivwgPRM2YMEQ
BTC+SW: bc1qwv5fzv9u6arksw6ytf79gfvce078vprtc0m55s
ETH: 0xc1071c60ae27c8cc3c834e11289205f8f9c78ca5
LTC: LcDkAj4XxtoPWP5ucw75JadMcDfurwupet
BAT: 0xc1071c60Ae27C8CC3c834E11289205f8F9C78CA5
XMR: 438fUMciiahbYemDyww6afT1atgqK3tSTX25SEmYknpmenTR6wvXDMeco1ThX2E8gBQgm9eKd1KAtEQvKzNMFrmjJJpiino