Cultcow Russell Greer / @theofficialinstaofrussellgreer - Swift-Obsessed Sex Pest, Magical Star Buddy, Now On Probation for E-Stalking

Let's Find Out!

How's the view from sugar heaven, bitch?
True & Honest Fan
I love how he thinks "they tied me to a chair and beat me" is believable. Like yeah okay Taylor Swift had her security or whoever "they" were straight up torture him for shits and giggles, that makes perfect sense. I remember that one time i went to one of her concerts and whilst minding my own buisness Security comes up and just beats the shit out of me 3v1 with flaming baseball bats wrapped in razor wire then dump Tabasco sauce in the wounds literally just because they were bored. True story and if you dont believe it that's discrimination
Okay this is my autistic editor coming out, but do y'all seriously not understand the difference between literally and figuratively?

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Stilgar of Troon

Facial Fremen-isation Surgery
True & Honest Fan
Okay this is my autistic editor coming out, but do y'all seriously not understand the difference between literally and figuratively?

View attachment 1848497
I think the point was made earlier that he waited until he'd unloaded his litany of complaints before clarifying that it was figurative*, in typical Russ fashion, maximising his "pity me" efforts.

*the word he should have used there, incidentally
 
Okay this is my autistic editor coming out, but do y'all seriously not understand the difference between literally and figuratively?

View attachment 1848497
My bad i just saw "tied me to a chair and beat me" part and went full sperg thinking he was actually trying to claim that. Thanks for sharing that pic though because "They grabbed my by the hair and dragged me the mud" is right up there with "suck me my penis" to me now as favorite quote
 

Let's Find Out!

How's the view from sugar heaven, bitch?
True & Honest Fan
I think the point was made earlier that he waited until he'd unloaded his litany of complaints before clarifying that it was figurative*, in typical Russ fashion, maximising his "pity me" efforts.

*the word he should have used there, incidentally
Yes, that point was made by yours truly. :biggrin:

My bad i just saw "tied me to a chair and beat me" part and went full sperg thinking he was actually trying to claim that. Thanks for sharing that pic though because "They grabbed my by the hair and dragged me the mud" is right up there with "suck me my penis" to me now as favorite quote
To be fair, he did save the figurative part for the very end of his retarded accusations. Lord knows I've read something halfway and sperged out over a nothingburger a million times. <3
 

AbraCadaver

HI MARISSA!!!!
True & Honest Fan
Okay this is my autistic editor coming out, but do y'all seriously not understand the difference between literally and figuratively?

View attachment 1848497
Yeah I saw, but deliberately ignored it in favour of comedy.

And yes, the real issue is that he stated these things and then added “...in minecraft” to the end like the fact that none of them even happened was beside the point.
 

Let's Find Out!

How's the view from sugar heaven, bitch?
True & Honest Fan
Yeah I saw, but deliberately ignored it in favour of comedy.

And yes, the real issue is that he stated these things and then added “...in minecraft” to the end like the fact that none of them even happened was beside the point.
NGL, most of the time it's better to do things in the service of comedy.
 

AbraCadaver

HI MARISSA!!!!
True & Honest Fan
NGL, most of the time it's better to do things in the service of comedy.
I enjoy Russ’ bold new literary technique of claiming absurdly violent, completely unrelated and outright fabricated events, followed by “and this was all figurative, but you get my point.”

What point? I now have no idea what actually transpired, because what you “figuratively” said happened has no relationship to what actually happened, nor does it lead one to even draw any logical conclusions.

“The other day my internet provider came to my flat to do a repair and it was terrible. The service man held me down and chewed out my eyes from their sockets, raped me and left me for dead. Of course this is all figurative, but you get my point.”

“I was so mad at the bus driver yesterday because I wanted to sit in the front but instead he burned my house down and framed me for a child’s kidnapping. Figuratively of course, but you get my point.”

I wonder how he would react if Erika had put up a Facebook post saying, “I tried to get Russell Greer to stop pursuing me romantically and to leave me alone, but instead he soaked my car liberally in litres of his own urine and rammed a pickaxe through my mother’s skull, blunt end first. Figuratively, but you get my point.”
 
I enjoy Russ’ bold new literary technique of claiming absurdly violent, completely unrelated and outright fabricated events, followed by “and this was all figurative, but you get my point.”

What point? I now have no idea what actually transpired, because what you “figuratively” said happened has no relationship to what actually happened, nor does it lead one to even draw any logical conclusions.

“The other day my internet provider came to my flat to do a repair and it was terrible. The service man held me down and chewed out my eyes from their sockets, raped me and left me for dead. Of course this is all figurative, but you get my point.”

“I was so mad at the bus driver yesterday because I wanted to sit in the front but instead he burned my house down and framed me for a child’s kidnapping. Figuratively of course, but you get my point.”

I wonder how he would react if Erika had put up a Facebook post saying, “I tried to get Russell Greer to stop pursuing me romantically and to leave me alone, but instead he soaked my car liberally in litres of his own urine and rammed a pickaxe through my mother’s skull, blunt end first. Figuratively, but you get my point.”
His point is that his feelings are really really hurt so he makes over the top physical comparisons to try explaining how extremely hurt he is emotionally by the fact people always drag him the mud but never suck him the penis

To him being politely turned down or made fun of by the farms would be the emotional equivilent of something like this
 
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I enjoy Russ’ bold new literary technique of claiming absurdly violent, completely unrelated and outright fabricated events, followed by “and this was all figurative, but you get my point.”
He especially couldn't resist including shit like that in his book. He even paid (sort of) to have a cheap comic of Taylor Swift stabbing him in the opening pages. In his deranged mind he really does think all of this is equivalent to being told no, though.
 

Apteryx Owenii

formerly a jerkop, wants to avoid merge
True & Honest Fan
Another issue is that he does not use language like normal people. Someone might say, figuratively, that they were "stabbed in the back" or "dragged through the mud." But "they tied me to a chair and beat me" is not a figurative phrase. It's not a metaphor or figure of speech. It's just a thing you said happened and then subsequently admitted did not happen.
 

Kosher Salt

(((NaCl)))
Another issue is that he does not use language like normal people. Someone might say, figuratively, that they were "stabbed in the back" or "dragged through the mud." But "they tied me to a chair and beat me" is not a figurative phrase. It's not a metaphor or figure of speech. It's just a thing you said happened and then subsequently admitted did not happen.
Not to mention that his use of metaphors and figures of speech is fucking weird; he's always mixing them up.
 
He especially couldn't resist including shit like that in his book. He even paid (sort of) to have a cheap comic of Taylor Swift stabbing him in the opening pages. In his deranged mind he really does think all of this is equivalent to being told no, though.
And while we're at it, he GENUINELY thinks that this not only makes him look good, but somehow this will "A WOO HOO HOO" Taylor over to his side?? WTF?
Why would anyone who sees themselves portrayed in that way think: "Oh, wow, my agents are real dicks! I'll just call up this Fussel Mear and ask him if he wants to still go on that field trip to Cold Stone!"
 

DrJonesHat

Billionaire Proctologist
True & Honest Fan
And while we're at it, he GENUINELY thinks that this not only makes him look good, but somehow this will "A WOO HOO HOO" Taylor over to his side?? WTF?
Why would anyone who sees themselves portrayed in that way think: "Oh, wow, my agents are real dicks! I'll just call up this Fussel Mear and ask him if he wants to still go on that field trip to Cold Stone!"
I love how he went from "Taylor's evil agents won't let her get gifts from fans!" to "Taylor HATES me!" when told he was bothering her family.
 
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