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I don't exactly expect this thread to generate a lot of discussion, but I thought that at least this person might be of interest to the fine forum members and should be briefly discussed. If you have questions on this guy or the political background, I can try to answer them or do further research.
Seppo Lehto is a political activist of Far Right persuasion - basically, a living stereotype of the "let's actually do the jingoistic bullshit that the nationalists rambled about during the WW2". In 2013, he made probably his biggest "achievement" so far: One of the Members of Parliament from the Nationalistic But Totally Not Nazi Party Guys Party decided to invite him to watch the proceedings, and Lehto got thrown to the street pretty fast for throwing a few Nazi salutes. Not only that, but the party decided to fire the MP in question, too, because they're the Totally Not Nazi Party Party, did I mention that?
Lehto is actually notorious enough to warrant a Wikipedia article. Unfortunately, as is the case with many gloriously nutty people, Wikipedia needs edited mass-media sources, and by the time the nutty people actually get noticed by mass media, they probably already have made their presence known to a lot of people who have interesting stories to tell.
Lehto could be best described as a quaint Internet personality whom everyone who has been following the scene has ran into at some point. I ran into Lehto as a very distant observer a really long time ago - somewhere in the late 1990s or early 2000s, in the Usenet. Lehto was often spamming the discussions with pretty damn vile Nazi bullshit, and emailing the same to every politician and manager of a vaguely influential organisation could find.
(One Usenet poster, who had somehow ended up as a recipient of these mass postings, had this thing as his signature: "'Oh, we've heard of Seppo Lehto, but who the hell is [OP]?' - overheard in the Parliament House cafeteria")
It was actually funny how in the late 1990s, we took pride in the fact that the President and the Members of the Parliament could be reached via email ("just like in America!"). Then there's this guy. This is why we can't have nice things.
Since then, Lehto started doing various blogs that contained more of the same, and apparently ran a podcast - which I've never listened to because I think it might physically hurt, the messages and blogs were bad enough.
It's actually unfortunate that, back in the day, I mostly saw cross-posted spam and never actually managed to go to the Usenet groups where the guy primarily hanged in and actually talked to people, because that might have been amusing. I found one website whose maintainer collected this material, but the site was unfortunately put to mothballs long time ago. The maintainer apparently sells the archives on CD-ROM - I should probably approach him at some point.
So, for the benefit of the forumers, I decided to translate the introduction of this website - because I'm sure everyone here will find this insight on particularly interesting and resonating. I've often said that CWCki and Kiwi Farms are particularly interesting to me because back in the day, Finnish BBS and Internet enthusiasts were busy doing exactly same things in documenting various lolcowish personalities. I'd say we're doing a decent enough job.
-------------------------------------------
Welcome to the twilight zone!
What is Total War©?
This website has an archive of correspondence, statements and press releases from Seppo Lehto and Klaus von Grewendorp (née Juutilainen) from the Internet and mailing lists, mostly between 1999-2004. This introduction is meant to explain to the uninitiated readers what this conflict is all about.
Who is Seppo Lehto?
Lehto is a social activist from Tampere. He is the founder, chairman and – as far can be discerned – the only member of Suur-Suomi ry [“Greater Finland” registered non-profit association]. For a decade and a half, Lehto's agenda has been the following:
a) Return of Karelian territories, re-annexation of Eastern Karelia to Finland and claiming war reparations from the genocidal government of Moscow.
b) The destruction of the Russian Federation and the return of its territories to their rightful owners.
c) Deportation of niggers and Moroccoans from Finland, by the means of forestry industry if that proves necessary.
d) Multiplication of the nation in order to populate the fair beaches of lake Ladoga and lake Onega. This procreation is hindered by the unpatriotic activities of various gay, lesbian and Swedish-Finn organisations.
e) Throating of various russkieish factions. Russkie factions are everywhere, especially the mass media and government agencies.
Who is Klaus von Grewendorp?
Klasu is a much more difficult case to describe. Primarily, he is the representative of Finnish germanic (or indogermanic) races and the monarchists. The history of humankind and the entirety of world politics are reduced to the eternal fight of the germanic races against their old enemies. The germanics are originally from the Aldebaran system, from where they came to Earth to found the ancient Atlantis. After the Great Flood, the germanics, with their superior intellect and physical qualities, spread through the world to sow the seeds of higher cultures.
Fennougrics (or ugric-udmurtians) and the slavs are old enemies of the germanics. Both of those races, unlike the germanics, are descended from monkeys and are communists demanding the nationalisation of means of production and the subjugation of the germanic people. The voice of the ugric-udmurtians in Finland is the nationalistic citizen's organisation Suomen Sisu ry.
Any given person's ugricity, germanicity and slavonicity is – in principle – determined through strict genetic criteria, but in practice, any person may turn out to be ugric or slavonic by disagreeing with Klasu about anything at all.
As he is fighting for the honour of the germanic race, Klasu has several collaborators; the most important are the National Socialist base Valhalla in the Moon, and the Grand Duchy of Monaco – Klasu has a warm relationship to its princesses. Klasu also works in numerous secret projects with various intelligence agencies.
Klasu's real surname is von Grewendorp, but the magistrate that is infiltrated by the ugric-udmutians refuses to register it and claims that Klasu's real surname is Juutilainen. Klasu is currently fighting this forced ugrification in the Supreme Administrative Court of Finland and the European Court of Human Rights.
How exactly are Lehto and Klasu related?
As far as substance goes, outsiders would say that Lehto and Klasu are quite unanimous. Both consider Russia and the factions sympathising with Russia their enemies. Yet, Klasu is Lehto's worst enemy, and Lehto is Klasu's worst enemy. Thus, the material on this website happens to mostly concern the conflict between the two.
No one knows the exact reasons for the conflict. According to the most widely accepted view, Klasu, back when the heaven was new, left his buddy Lehto in a bit of a bind when he ended up in an altercation with the representatives of russkieish factions of Russian Club of Tampere. The complete truth is only known to the gentlemen themselves, and neither is willing to enlighten the others in a credible manner.
On a special note, in his fight against Lehto and other enemies, Klasu will employ sort of a negation of Paasikivian foreign policy: he has no fixed interests, only fixed enemies. If the enemy supports someone, Klasu will oppose them, and vice versa.
Even if Lehto and Klasu hate each other, they understand one another, unlike the most of the surrounding world. They have silently agreed upon the ground rules. The fight will be harsh but fair. Both Lehto and Klasu know that, fundamentally, everything is about sex. Klasu believes that the Russkieness of Lehto is related to the fact that Lehto is a paedophile and a stripper and has admitted to have been in sexual intercourse with a golden retriever. Lehto's view is that Klasu's Russkieness is related to the fact that Klasu's hobbies include sexual intercourses with various woodland creatures and an inflatable rubber person. This will never end in any kind of a consensus, but both gentlemen value well-put arguments much more than a sense of permanent victory. The battle will, quite literally, last forever.
Other characters
In addition to Lehto and Klasu, third parties take part in the discussion. One category is formed by the unhappy recipients of Lehto's mass postings (this includes several very prominent figures), who are mostly asking to get off the mailing list. More active – if random – participants in the discussions include the reichsführer Pekka Siitoin from Vehmaa, party leader Väinö Kuisma from Lahti and party leader Olavi Mäenpää from Turku. They're usually supporting either Lehto or Klasu, but the alliances and their borders shall be in flux, as if in famed Orwell novels.
Regular commenters include Mauno Koivisto, Tellervo Koivisto, Pertti Paasio, Tarja Halonen, marshall Mannerheim, Vladimir Putin, George Bush, Matti Wuori, God and other famous luminaries. Not everyone is convinced that these comments are authentic.
Other side comments are made by Klasu's supporters, who, despite of their vehement claims to the contrary, are commonly believed to be side personalites of Klasu. The reader is left to make his or her own conclusions on the facts.
Since 2001, the third protagonist, in a manner of speaking, has been the undersigned, against which Klasu has taken a judical battle regarding the existence of this website. This side plot is covered in the Legalese Special contained within.
The richness of expression
Absolutely no one who has followed the fight between Lehto and Klasu will deny that the exchange of words is possibly the crudest debate of all time in Finnish language in any media. The debate proceeds with no punches held back. The random readers will be flabbergasted beyond belief, and every overly serious person will stop reading immediately. Many have even criticised the staff for archiving such filth, and some have even reported crimes – claiming various sections of criminal law – to the police. This is not a fruitful approach. Allow me to tell why.
What's the point?
For a random passer-by, the archived material in this website is just an endless stream of obscenities. People often ask us – the people who analyse this material for a hobby – what exactly is so fascinating about Lehto's and Klasu's messages. I'll try to explain it as best I can in the following.
The Internet is full of strange things, but few of them are original in any way. The Internet seems to mostly be a communications channel for old phenomena. It has geneological research – people used to do that before the Internet. It has pornography – previously, you could get it on video tapes and magazines. It has information – previously, you could get it from encyclopaedias. Total War© is one of the few phenomena that are only possible because of the Internet.
The beauty of Total War© is based on the same conflict that Salvador Dali's paintings are riding on. There are two dimensions – the dream world and the waking world. Both of these are based on certain paradigms and causal laws. The laws of dream and waking world conflict with one another, and due to this, during the transition – the waking – a person will be confused for a while. In the morning, for a few moments, the paradigms of dream will force their way to the waking world, but by the time he or she gets to the bathroom, the waking person has already gotten reoriented to the laws of the waking world. In normal conditions, the dream and the wake shall never meet.
Total War© isn't being waged in the same dimension where most of the people live their ordinary life. The Internet has brought the surface of the Total War© dimension in contact with the surface of our world. This creates a conflict. I had this revelation when I was discussing one of the episodes contained in this corpus with a friend of mine. One beautiful morning, the head of the Student Association Choir of Helsinki School of Economics, Erik Pöntiskoski, was one of the hundreds of recipients of an email from Lehto. The email contained a “list of animals which the kike swine Klaus Juutilainen has buggered or attempted to bugger”.
Pöntiskoski reacted as most people would react. He did not now
When contrasted with the paradigms of our dimension, Lehto's message made absolutely no sense whatsoever. But what Pöntiskoski didn't know was that this message was not sent from this dimension. It was sent from a dimension which has paradigms and causalities that unquestionably dictate that Klaus Juutilainen is running around the forests of Tesoma, attempting to bugger various animals in their anal holes. This tendency of Klaus Juutilainen is related to his russkieness, because the buggering of animals, along with other hobbies of his, is an essental part of russkieness. Russkieness is a national scourge, the true antithesis of right-minded Greater Finnishness. Therefore, the fact that Klaus Juutilainen yearns to bugger animals is of national significance, and this matter is relevant to everybody, including the Student Association Choir.
As he sent the message from the Total War© dimension, Lehto was thinking by the aforementioned laws of nature. As such, Pöntiskoski's reaction was just as incomprehensible to Lehto as Lehto's original message has been to Pöntiskoski. This made Lehto ask, in his annoyance, if Pöntiskoski was “a russkie, if [he] is so unwilling to receive Greater-Finnish material”, and whether the Student Association Choir are “patriotic singers or russkie-minded commie wankers”.
Importantly, the beauty of Total War© isn't based on the spew of obscenities. The beauty is in the conflict which is created when two universes that are based on completely different laws are in constant contact through the Internet, and the representatives of both universes believe that there is only one universe. Due to the latter fact, the people involved generally don't see anything funny in the situation. From Pöntiskoski's point of view, there's a chaotic and out-of-control foul-mouth called Lehto who is rampaging in the Internet. From Lehto's point of view, the Student Association Choir, and all other places, have been infested with immeasurably many russkie-minded commie wankers, who just don't get even simple facts. An educated reader is in a fortuitous position, because he or she can follow the conflict as a fly in the ceiling, aware that two dimensions are warring with each other, and that both dimension thinks they're the only one.
These musings are meant to assist the reader through the initiation phase that took me at least six months to get through. Only then did I realise that the things I read had their own internal orders and predictabilities, if you do not try to foce them into the template of the “normal world”. I wish you very happy reading, and as a closing note, I'll quote a friend of mine who has been thinking a lot about these issues:
Not even a seeing hen can find the seeds to eat where none can be found. Finding the truth can be frustrating, if the true substance of the debate is missing altogether.
Seppo's and Klasu's activities must be taken as they are, au naturel. Things must flow over you and you must maintain your unfathomably deep calm, like a zen monk.
When the recipient is fully clear in mind, things start to happen. Everything is true, and everything is related to everything else.
[Original text by Jussi Halla-Aho]
Seppo Lehto is a political activist of Far Right persuasion - basically, a living stereotype of the "let's actually do the jingoistic bullshit that the nationalists rambled about during the WW2". In 2013, he made probably his biggest "achievement" so far: One of the Members of Parliament from the Nationalistic But Totally Not Nazi Party Guys Party decided to invite him to watch the proceedings, and Lehto got thrown to the street pretty fast for throwing a few Nazi salutes. Not only that, but the party decided to fire the MP in question, too, because they're the Totally Not Nazi Party Party, did I mention that?
Lehto is actually notorious enough to warrant a Wikipedia article. Unfortunately, as is the case with many gloriously nutty people, Wikipedia needs edited mass-media sources, and by the time the nutty people actually get noticed by mass media, they probably already have made their presence known to a lot of people who have interesting stories to tell.
Lehto could be best described as a quaint Internet personality whom everyone who has been following the scene has ran into at some point. I ran into Lehto as a very distant observer a really long time ago - somewhere in the late 1990s or early 2000s, in the Usenet. Lehto was often spamming the discussions with pretty damn vile Nazi bullshit, and emailing the same to every politician and manager of a vaguely influential organisation could find.
(One Usenet poster, who had somehow ended up as a recipient of these mass postings, had this thing as his signature: "'Oh, we've heard of Seppo Lehto, but who the hell is [OP]?' - overheard in the Parliament House cafeteria")
It was actually funny how in the late 1990s, we took pride in the fact that the President and the Members of the Parliament could be reached via email ("just like in America!"). Then there's this guy. This is why we can't have nice things.
Since then, Lehto started doing various blogs that contained more of the same, and apparently ran a podcast - which I've never listened to because I think it might physically hurt, the messages and blogs were bad enough.
It's actually unfortunate that, back in the day, I mostly saw cross-posted spam and never actually managed to go to the Usenet groups where the guy primarily hanged in and actually talked to people, because that might have been amusing. I found one website whose maintainer collected this material, but the site was unfortunately put to mothballs long time ago. The maintainer apparently sells the archives on CD-ROM - I should probably approach him at some point.
So, for the benefit of the forumers, I decided to translate the introduction of this website - because I'm sure everyone here will find this insight on particularly interesting and resonating. I've often said that CWCki and Kiwi Farms are particularly interesting to me because back in the day, Finnish BBS and Internet enthusiasts were busy doing exactly same things in documenting various lolcowish personalities. I'd say we're doing a decent enough job.
-------------------------------------------
Welcome to the twilight zone!
What is Total War©?
This website has an archive of correspondence, statements and press releases from Seppo Lehto and Klaus von Grewendorp (née Juutilainen) from the Internet and mailing lists, mostly between 1999-2004. This introduction is meant to explain to the uninitiated readers what this conflict is all about.
Who is Seppo Lehto?
Lehto is a social activist from Tampere. He is the founder, chairman and – as far can be discerned – the only member of Suur-Suomi ry [“Greater Finland” registered non-profit association]. For a decade and a half, Lehto's agenda has been the following:
a) Return of Karelian territories, re-annexation of Eastern Karelia to Finland and claiming war reparations from the genocidal government of Moscow.
b) The destruction of the Russian Federation and the return of its territories to their rightful owners.
c) Deportation of niggers and Moroccoans from Finland, by the means of forestry industry if that proves necessary.
d) Multiplication of the nation in order to populate the fair beaches of lake Ladoga and lake Onega. This procreation is hindered by the unpatriotic activities of various gay, lesbian and Swedish-Finn organisations.
e) Throating of various russkieish factions. Russkie factions are everywhere, especially the mass media and government agencies.
Who is Klaus von Grewendorp?
Klasu is a much more difficult case to describe. Primarily, he is the representative of Finnish germanic (or indogermanic) races and the monarchists. The history of humankind and the entirety of world politics are reduced to the eternal fight of the germanic races against their old enemies. The germanics are originally from the Aldebaran system, from where they came to Earth to found the ancient Atlantis. After the Great Flood, the germanics, with their superior intellect and physical qualities, spread through the world to sow the seeds of higher cultures.
Fennougrics (or ugric-udmurtians) and the slavs are old enemies of the germanics. Both of those races, unlike the germanics, are descended from monkeys and are communists demanding the nationalisation of means of production and the subjugation of the germanic people. The voice of the ugric-udmurtians in Finland is the nationalistic citizen's organisation Suomen Sisu ry.
Any given person's ugricity, germanicity and slavonicity is – in principle – determined through strict genetic criteria, but in practice, any person may turn out to be ugric or slavonic by disagreeing with Klasu about anything at all.
As he is fighting for the honour of the germanic race, Klasu has several collaborators; the most important are the National Socialist base Valhalla in the Moon, and the Grand Duchy of Monaco – Klasu has a warm relationship to its princesses. Klasu also works in numerous secret projects with various intelligence agencies.
Klasu's real surname is von Grewendorp, but the magistrate that is infiltrated by the ugric-udmutians refuses to register it and claims that Klasu's real surname is Juutilainen. Klasu is currently fighting this forced ugrification in the Supreme Administrative Court of Finland and the European Court of Human Rights.
How exactly are Lehto and Klasu related?
As far as substance goes, outsiders would say that Lehto and Klasu are quite unanimous. Both consider Russia and the factions sympathising with Russia their enemies. Yet, Klasu is Lehto's worst enemy, and Lehto is Klasu's worst enemy. Thus, the material on this website happens to mostly concern the conflict between the two.
No one knows the exact reasons for the conflict. According to the most widely accepted view, Klasu, back when the heaven was new, left his buddy Lehto in a bit of a bind when he ended up in an altercation with the representatives of russkieish factions of Russian Club of Tampere. The complete truth is only known to the gentlemen themselves, and neither is willing to enlighten the others in a credible manner.
On a special note, in his fight against Lehto and other enemies, Klasu will employ sort of a negation of Paasikivian foreign policy: he has no fixed interests, only fixed enemies. If the enemy supports someone, Klasu will oppose them, and vice versa.
Even if Lehto and Klasu hate each other, they understand one another, unlike the most of the surrounding world. They have silently agreed upon the ground rules. The fight will be harsh but fair. Both Lehto and Klasu know that, fundamentally, everything is about sex. Klasu believes that the Russkieness of Lehto is related to the fact that Lehto is a paedophile and a stripper and has admitted to have been in sexual intercourse with a golden retriever. Lehto's view is that Klasu's Russkieness is related to the fact that Klasu's hobbies include sexual intercourses with various woodland creatures and an inflatable rubber person. This will never end in any kind of a consensus, but both gentlemen value well-put arguments much more than a sense of permanent victory. The battle will, quite literally, last forever.
Other characters
In addition to Lehto and Klasu, third parties take part in the discussion. One category is formed by the unhappy recipients of Lehto's mass postings (this includes several very prominent figures), who are mostly asking to get off the mailing list. More active – if random – participants in the discussions include the reichsführer Pekka Siitoin from Vehmaa, party leader Väinö Kuisma from Lahti and party leader Olavi Mäenpää from Turku. They're usually supporting either Lehto or Klasu, but the alliances and their borders shall be in flux, as if in famed Orwell novels.
Regular commenters include Mauno Koivisto, Tellervo Koivisto, Pertti Paasio, Tarja Halonen, marshall Mannerheim, Vladimir Putin, George Bush, Matti Wuori, God and other famous luminaries. Not everyone is convinced that these comments are authentic.
Other side comments are made by Klasu's supporters, who, despite of their vehement claims to the contrary, are commonly believed to be side personalites of Klasu. The reader is left to make his or her own conclusions on the facts.
Since 2001, the third protagonist, in a manner of speaking, has been the undersigned, against which Klasu has taken a judical battle regarding the existence of this website. This side plot is covered in the Legalese Special contained within.
The richness of expression
Absolutely no one who has followed the fight between Lehto and Klasu will deny that the exchange of words is possibly the crudest debate of all time in Finnish language in any media. The debate proceeds with no punches held back. The random readers will be flabbergasted beyond belief, and every overly serious person will stop reading immediately. Many have even criticised the staff for archiving such filth, and some have even reported crimes – claiming various sections of criminal law – to the police. This is not a fruitful approach. Allow me to tell why.
What's the point?
For a random passer-by, the archived material in this website is just an endless stream of obscenities. People often ask us – the people who analyse this material for a hobby – what exactly is so fascinating about Lehto's and Klasu's messages. I'll try to explain it as best I can in the following.
The Internet is full of strange things, but few of them are original in any way. The Internet seems to mostly be a communications channel for old phenomena. It has geneological research – people used to do that before the Internet. It has pornography – previously, you could get it on video tapes and magazines. It has information – previously, you could get it from encyclopaedias. Total War© is one of the few phenomena that are only possible because of the Internet.
The beauty of Total War© is based on the same conflict that Salvador Dali's paintings are riding on. There are two dimensions – the dream world and the waking world. Both of these are based on certain paradigms and causal laws. The laws of dream and waking world conflict with one another, and due to this, during the transition – the waking – a person will be confused for a while. In the morning, for a few moments, the paradigms of dream will force their way to the waking world, but by the time he or she gets to the bathroom, the waking person has already gotten reoriented to the laws of the waking world. In normal conditions, the dream and the wake shall never meet.
Total War© isn't being waged in the same dimension where most of the people live their ordinary life. The Internet has brought the surface of the Total War© dimension in contact with the surface of our world. This creates a conflict. I had this revelation when I was discussing one of the episodes contained in this corpus with a friend of mine. One beautiful morning, the head of the Student Association Choir of Helsinki School of Economics, Erik Pöntiskoski, was one of the hundreds of recipients of an email from Lehto. The email contained a “list of animals which the kike swine Klaus Juutilainen has buggered or attempted to bugger”.
Pöntiskoski reacted as most people would react. He did not now
- who is Klaus Juutilainen,
- why is he a “kike swine”,
- what exactly is a “kike swine”,
- what the hell does “buggering animals” even mean,
- why does this particular issue have any relevance to anything at all in general, and
- why is this particular issue in any way relevant to the Student Association Choir in specific.
When contrasted with the paradigms of our dimension, Lehto's message made absolutely no sense whatsoever. But what Pöntiskoski didn't know was that this message was not sent from this dimension. It was sent from a dimension which has paradigms and causalities that unquestionably dictate that Klaus Juutilainen is running around the forests of Tesoma, attempting to bugger various animals in their anal holes. This tendency of Klaus Juutilainen is related to his russkieness, because the buggering of animals, along with other hobbies of his, is an essental part of russkieness. Russkieness is a national scourge, the true antithesis of right-minded Greater Finnishness. Therefore, the fact that Klaus Juutilainen yearns to bugger animals is of national significance, and this matter is relevant to everybody, including the Student Association Choir.
As he sent the message from the Total War© dimension, Lehto was thinking by the aforementioned laws of nature. As such, Pöntiskoski's reaction was just as incomprehensible to Lehto as Lehto's original message has been to Pöntiskoski. This made Lehto ask, in his annoyance, if Pöntiskoski was “a russkie, if [he] is so unwilling to receive Greater-Finnish material”, and whether the Student Association Choir are “patriotic singers or russkie-minded commie wankers”.
Importantly, the beauty of Total War© isn't based on the spew of obscenities. The beauty is in the conflict which is created when two universes that are based on completely different laws are in constant contact through the Internet, and the representatives of both universes believe that there is only one universe. Due to the latter fact, the people involved generally don't see anything funny in the situation. From Pöntiskoski's point of view, there's a chaotic and out-of-control foul-mouth called Lehto who is rampaging in the Internet. From Lehto's point of view, the Student Association Choir, and all other places, have been infested with immeasurably many russkie-minded commie wankers, who just don't get even simple facts. An educated reader is in a fortuitous position, because he or she can follow the conflict as a fly in the ceiling, aware that two dimensions are warring with each other, and that both dimension thinks they're the only one.
These musings are meant to assist the reader through the initiation phase that took me at least six months to get through. Only then did I realise that the things I read had their own internal orders and predictabilities, if you do not try to foce them into the template of the “normal world”. I wish you very happy reading, and as a closing note, I'll quote a friend of mine who has been thinking a lot about these issues:
Not even a seeing hen can find the seeds to eat where none can be found. Finding the truth can be frustrating, if the true substance of the debate is missing altogether.
Seppo's and Klasu's activities must be taken as they are, au naturel. Things must flow over you and you must maintain your unfathomably deep calm, like a zen monk.
When the recipient is fully clear in mind, things start to happen. Everything is true, and everything is related to everything else.
[Original text by Jussi Halla-Aho]
