Share Your School Stories - Weirdos, freaks, and idiots (self-inclusion optional)

MysticMisty

kiwifarms.net
Really should stop powerleveling, but recent posts made me remember this incident in middle school.

So I was taking this film elective where we just watched movies, and one of the films we watched was about this learning-disabled-but-strong kid who befriends a kid who's a genius but has serious physical disabilities. In the end the learning-disabled kid gets better at reading and shit, while the smart one succumbs to his disabilites and fucking dies at like 12.

The teacher asked who we'd rather be, and I said definitely the learning-disabled one because I didn't want to die around my then-current age. They got irritated and scolded me for making that choice.

Still think I was completely right.
We watched that movie my sophomore year of high school. I cried, a lot. And no, it's not the wrong choice because Max is actually a gentle soul who unfortunately looks like his murdering dad, and Kevin reveals that side to everyone.
 

FuckedUp

kiwifarms.net
We watched that movie my sophomore year of high school. I cried, a lot. And no, it's not the wrong choice because Max is actually a gentle soul who unfortunately looks like his murdering dad, and Kevin reveals that side to everyone.
Yeah, I've already disclosed my intelligence test results (which I didn't know at the time I saw the film) more times than the average Quora user, but what's the point of having a five billion IQ if you don't even live past seventh grade? Max may not be a genius, but he's not a literal retard either and can have an actual life.
 

Count groudon

Concentration camp counselor
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Looked it up. Book was called that, but the film was just "The Mighty".
I fucking read that shit when I was 9. That was the first time a book actually made me cry. Why the actual fuck do so many children’s books involve kids and dogs dying? Why couldn’t they just let us enjoy our blissful innocence until that raging bitch called life took it from us a few years down the road? It’s like the kids book version of having some lady get raped in a lifetime movie at this point.
 
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SojuDrnkr

Stays after last call.
kiwifarms.net
In high school during study hall I was hanging out with one of my friends who was reading that graphic novel Mous, and she was showing me the part where the holocaust survivor was filling a cereal box with packing peanuts and sealing it up to return it, basically getting free cereal. I said "wow, that's a jewy thing to do". The study hall teacher stood up and asked me what I said, so I repeated my self. Then she was like "don't say that again!", I was like, "why? It's a very Jewy thing to do" and landed myself in detention.

It's a stupid story, but it was a pretty funny altercation at the time.
 

yoshitsune

Late Heian period cowboy
kiwifarms.net
My Latin teacher in secondary school was very young, he was almost fresh out of graduating uni in fact. He was pretty cool and wanted to make sure everybody understood the material, he also never sat at his desk except for when he did the roll call in the beginning, he conducted his lectures standing. Anyway, one time he told us that he has "important business" to attend to and that we should behave ourselves for the 5-10 minutes that he'll be gone. The school's parking lot was in the back of the building and you had a partial view of it from our classroom. Unfortunately for him, we could just about see that he met some woman (who later on turned out was his then-girlfriend, now-wife) and they were making out for at least 5 minutes straight. When he returned to the classroom he had the biggest shit-eating grin on his face. He also sported an erection, and we noticed. When he looked at the class he saw that all of us had bigger shit-eating grins than he just had. He noticed that we noticed. We noticed that he noticed that we noticed. He noticed that we noticed that he noticed that we noticed. His face changed color 3 times in less than 10 seconds, from a ghostly pale to a sickly yellow to red, and it stayed red until the bell rang. He then sat at his desk and stayed there, not saying anything, not moving even slightly, and neither did we. This went on for about 15 minutes. When we got out of the classroom we all collectively burst out in laughter. Afterwards if we wanted to bust his balls we always alluded to erections, like for example "The grading in the last exam was pretty stiff". Thankfully, he had a really good sense of humor about it.
 

MysticMisty

kiwifarms.net
Yeah, I've already disclosed my intelligence test results (which I didn't know at the time I saw the film) more times than the average Quora user, but what's the point of having a five billion IQ if you don't even live past seventh grade? Max may not be a genius, but he's not a literal retard either and can have an actual life.
The implication anyways is that witnessing his dad murder his mom at 3 completely fucked him up. Otherwise he was of completely normal intelligence, which is not a bad thing by any means.

Anyways since this was an English class we didn't discuss who we'd rather be, but the literary themes and shit. The teacher was a bit lazy so sometimes instead of spending weeks reading and discussing a single book, we'd spend a few days watching a movie and then discuss that. The movies themselves could be hit or miss, but almost all the books she assigned would up being shit, so it was preferable.
 

Olhelm

The Hermit of KiwiFarms
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Alright, so this might be a long one. Forewarning.

When I was a kid, I was a part of a lot of AP/GT classes in elementary school, and the first year of middle school. Now, personally, I don't really think I was smart enough to justify the placement, I just read a lot of books and had a habit of using a lot of really big words in sentences. Apparently, that was enough to justify the decision.

Now, due to a number of reasons, I was a bullied kid as well, least of all being my placement in nerd classes. I was also white in a primarily black and latino school system, I was chubby, and I read books. So, most of my time growing up was pretty isolated in an educational sense. That being said, teachers and staff tended to like me a lot because I was quiet and I tended to at the very least have a grasp on my subjects. Except for math. Never did well in math.

Now, fast forward to 7th grade. I'm in middle school, and now have a reputation as the "quiet kid". You know the kind. Honestly, no quiet kid WANTS to be the quiet kid, but I had my role, and usually got into fights in PE. I think I may have only started one or two of em, while the rest usually came from a select group of students who believed that donkey-punching me was just the best thing in the world. I was in ISS (In-school Suspension) quite a lot due to this, but the teacher in charge of it was typically sympathetic towards me. I think overall I was in ISS for a total of five months' worth of that school year and had over 45 'conflicts' on my record.

And then Art Class started. It was the new semester, and my electives had shifted. I walked in, took a seat. Now, for a bit of outside context this was the point in my life when I started listening to heavier music, and my love of metal really started to blossom. I was listening to all the classics: Cannibal Corpse, Cattle Decapitation, the works. What I found just as interesting as the music itself, though, was the different album covers. I had never really seen art like that. Hell, I remember having my eyes covered by my brother when I was really little when there was a topless scene in a horror movie (I think it was Ghost Ship?). So, during the nights, I would study the different gory album covers, read up on their composition, who designed them, why, all that jazz. I wouldn't say I was drawn to all the gore necessarily, more just how well they complimented the music, as well as the skill that went into making them.

So, Art. You can imagine what I was thinking when I signed up, since I was doing all this research outside of class. As the quiet kid, I had a table to myself, until a kid that had never met me sat across from me. This was a huge deal to me, as actually having someone to talk to was exceedingly rare, so I started chatting about art. Turns out, he was an art fan too, and he had a pretty big artbook he carried with him.

Now, in my pre-teen, dumb state of mind, I bring up the album covers, to see if he knew what I was talking about. He didn't, so I started explaining all of the ones that were my favorites. Acid baths, maggotty corpses, all that jazz. He started getting really uncomfortable, so I stopped myself, and pushed my nose into my own book. I didn't really know how to handle that sort of situation, since I never really had the chance to talk to my peers.

Well, class starts, kid goes right to the teacher, and stays there. Teacher makes a phone call, and the Superintendent of the school comes into the room, and calls for me. I got really confused, and once I stepped outside, I saw that he had two police officers with him. I get escorted to the conference room in the office, you know, the place you're taken when what you've done is SO bad, that the regular principal's office isn't extreme enough to handle the weight of what you've done? I was confused out of my mind, and that's when they tell me, and I remember the words exactly:

"We're under the belief that you've threatened to murder another student."

For about half an hour, they interrogated me, threatened me, all the while I had broken down into a sobbing wreck. I had no idea what they were even talking about, and when I tried to explain myself, it got shut down, because "Kids your age don't listen to that kind of music". They make a phone call to my mom, tell her the situation, and remark that I'm going to be marked as a "terrorist" in my permanent record. When my mom got there, she was like a whirlwind of anger and indignation the likes of which I had never before been witness to. Granted, she's a short woman, only 5'5, and I was already 6 feet by that time, but I felt completely insignificant when she bore down on me and told me how badly I had messed up. She then wheeled around, and quite literally backed the superintendent into the corner, screaming at him about how much I've already been mistreated by the system, and how often I was punished for defending myself against bullies.

Eventually, he cracked. Through a combination of guilting, pleading, and a healthy touch of outside connections (my dad coached the Supes' kid in little league), the mark was taken off my record, but I was faced with ISS for a whole five months. I was also grounded, and was made to have an escort when leaving and entering the school. The gravity of what had happened took a while to sink in, and I'm still salty as hell about it.

So, yeah. tl;dr - I was labeled a terrorist on my permanent record for talking to another student about death metal.
 

SojuDrnkr

Stays after last call.
kiwifarms.net
Like most high schools, we had a thing called "Pride Week" which was the week leading up to the Homecoming football game. Each class got a hallway which they would decorate, after school hours, and all that junk.

The Freshman hall was always the worst because they had 0 funds saved up to decorate it. Well, during my senior year, somebody in my class dressed up as the grim reaper came running down the Freshman's hall screaming and tore all the Freshman's decorations down with a fake scythe. It was pretty hilarious.

They found out who it was and gave him a weeks suspension. On Friday, the day before the Homecoming game our school has a huge homecoming assembly with skits performed by the cheerleaders and football players, and competitions, like tug-o-war, which takes up the whole day basically. Everyone from our class kept on chanting "Free [x]!" which bothered the principal a whole lot.

There's another story about homecoming of that same year, but I'm on my mobile and don't feel like typing it all out RN.
 

SojuDrnkr

Stays after last call.
kiwifarms.net
I've literally never heard of any high school doing anything like that in my life.
I guess our school did it because we never did homecoming dances. Friday would be the assembly and games, and at night there would be a bonfire where we burn a paper machete of the other school's mascot and stuff like that. Most of us would smoke weed and/or drink before going to it. Sometimes someone would have an after party with a local band.
 

Kiwi Lime Pie

The tasteful summer treat. 🥝🥧🐈
kiwifarms.net
He did finally outgrow trying to steal my shit once he hit puberty thankfully. But now I’m super paranoid about lending people shit.
I can relate. On two separate occasions in college courses, I lent one classmate my copy of an assigned novel and another a group videotape in order for each of them to complete class assignments. In both cases, neither returned the lent item and both conveniently went incommunicado after that. 😠

So, I'm now very reluctant to lend anyone anything other than a spare pen or pencil.

I've literally never heard of any high school doing anything like that in my life.
My high school's version, known as Spirit Week, took place during the week leading up to our football team's homecoming game or our game with our crosstown rival. Each day, we were encouraged to dress up in themes (pajama day, school colors, mismatched clothes, etc.) and each homeroom teacher would send someone who best represented the day's theme to the cafeteria where the student government would then pick one of the nominees from each class as the day's most spirited students. Friday normally saw us have our final hour class replaced with an all-school pep rally.

@SojuDrnkr - I'm assuming your school called this Pride Week before "pride" became something associated with the push for LGBT acceptance.

During the basketball team's game against our crosstown rivals one year, the cheerleaders made one of those banners where the team would run through it on the way to their warm-ups in order to tear it in half and fire up the crowd. Instead, a student or two came out of the bleachers and ran through it before the team could. The offender(s) ended getting in trouble for that stunt and had to write an apology letter and either serve detention or be part of a supervised work detail -- a fancy term for having to pick up trash or wash desks one day after school in lieu of detention.
 

Smurfskii

The Ginger Prince
kiwifarms.net
Highschool's S building (its fucking retarded, supposed to be classes for Science & Math but has other goofy shit, which I'll talk about on this) has IT rooms, which anyone in the Coding, 3D Tinkering etc. clubs can access, and they made a shitty system that works with arduino that has an RFID reader that detects radio waves emitted by the cards we had made, problem is since it hadn't been set to a specific frequency, anything that really had chips could open it, from credit cards with the contactless payment technology and IstanbulKart (Public Transportation cards used in Istanbul, basically the same principle as Oyster cards in London, pic below for both) so people would enter into the room to use the PC's, since school's normal PC's are basically from primitive ages (they dont even have windows activated lol)

This didnt occur to be a problem really since we always had someone in the room on the beefiest pc having fun with VR or doing some other stupid shit, until people noticed they could download minecraft into these PC's if they had an USB or any sort of external drive, so they would download minecraft on them and start fucking playing when there wasnt anyone in there, so you could find a PC when you returned with minecraft on it, with a world they played with school's internet, basically using it as LAN since fortinet is the shittiest fucking internet security guard I had ever seen, you can literally enter the blocked sites by using http secure protocols instead of http normal protocols, as for some reason fortinet cant read these secure connections that are encrypted and not visible to their shit filter :story:

So yeah half the PC's had minecraft downloaded on them and it was a fucking pain in the ass to delete because non administrator accounts on school PC's are so limited, I did have access to one of school's administrator accounts as I had to download VSCode for the new Coding students and the trials on the old ones had expired, but I can't be arsed deleting minecraft off 30+ PC's when they can be downloaded back in a milisecond


P.S I do have another funny story about Minecraft and my school I can write if y'all are interested, this one was in 6th grade when we first got to use our iPads for education, and everyone rebelled against the school playing Minecraft on their iPads with LAN.
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SojuDrnkr

Stays after last call.
kiwifarms.net
@SojuDrnkr - I'm assuming your school called this Pride Week before "pride" became something associated with the push for LGBT acceptance.

This was in the mid-2000s, so I'm not sure if the alphabet mafia appropriated the word "pride" then. But our mascot was a Lion, since a group of lions is called a pride, yaddah yaddah, you get the picture.
 

PotatoSalad4711

Karen Farms gave me diabetes.
kiwifarms.net
I fucking read that shit when I was 9. That was the first time a book actually made me cry. Why the actual fuck do so many children’s books involve kids and dogs dying? Why couldn’t they just let us enjoy our blissful innocence until that raging bitch called life took it from us a few years down the road? It’s like the kids book version of having some lady get raped in a lifetime movie at this point.
Right? I’m still traumatized from reading Where the Red Fern Grows.

I guess our school did it because we never did homecoming dances. Friday would be the assembly and games, and at night there would be a bonfire where we burn a paper machete of the other school's mascot and stuff like that. Most of us would smoke weed and/or drink before going to it. Sometimes someone would have an after party with a local band.
Yep, I think ours was called “School Spirit Week”. It was also the week all the teacher’s houses got TP’d lol.

We had a raffle at one point where the seniors could buy a ticket to win a week of parking in the Principal’s parking spot. The guy who won had a car that broke down. So he put one of those inflatable chairs in the parking space with his name written across it in black marker. I don’t remember what happened to that, but it was the funniest thing.

By contrast, the weirdest thing I’ve ever seen happened in elementary school. There was this boy who was bigger than most of us and decided to be a little shit to everyone in the classroom. He was constantly getting in trouble. One day, we walked into the classroom and this boy was standing up front with an unknown man. The man introduced himself as the boy’s father, gave us a little speech about his son misbehaving and that this was his punishment...and proceeded to bend him over and spank his ass in front of everyone. Apparently this idea was approved by the school.

I don’t remember the kid ever being a problem after that, and no one made fun of him either because we were all afraid of the same fate. That teacher probably had the quietest year ever.
 

Gingervitis

kiwifarms.net
By contrast, the weirdest thing I’ve ever seen happened in elementary school. There was this boy who was bigger than most of us and decided to be a little shit to everyone in the classroom. He was constantly getting in trouble. One day, we walked into the classroom and this boy was standing up front with an unknown man. The man introduced himself as the boy’s father, gave us a little speech about his son misbehaving and that this was his punishment...and proceeded to bend him over and spank his ass in front of everyone. Apparently this idea was approved by the school.

I don’t remember the kid ever being a problem after that, and no one made fun of him either because we were all afraid of the same fate. That teacher probably had the quietest year ever.
This is really weird either way, but did the father pull down his pants for the spanking like in those old cartoons or did he just spank him like a “normal” person?

Either way, could you imagine this happening in current year? It would be a media shitshow.
 
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