Let's Sperg Social Justice Video Games -

[PhantomDiploma]

I'll start with the underwhelming OP "A Decision of Paramount Importance", the game about rummaging through your boyfriend's stuff and forming healthy relationships.

"A Decision of Paramount Importance" is also pretty underwhelming as a game, but I found the premise of violating your date's privacy to determine his character amusing in its own right.

Relationship advice

If you find books about "guns and hand to hand combat" the person you're dating is a "bad guy". This game was made in 2010, before the new Milo book was announced.

Some of the "signs" are a little bit blatant (if he flips out on you and physically threatens you over a political disagreement during dinner) while others, like his taste in books, are more [citation needed] and say more about the creator's prejudices than anything else. Also, if he has beer cans under his bed and "a leaf" in his desk, he's supposed to be a bad guy, which would suggest that most male college students will mutate into abusive monsters if let within whistling distance of a woman.

 

[Antipathy]

It's kind of creepy how the girlfriend character wants to know everything about the male character. Control issues?

 

[Jaimas]

I've suffered through reviewed a few of these turds. The worst ones are, in order:

6. I Get this Call Every Day
You know, I'll give David Gallant credit; this is somewhat distantly amusing and has some good ideas mired under terrible execution. If he could stop acting like an asshole, shrieking about Gamergate, and put some fucking effort in, this very well may have joined the list of games which sucked, but not too badly, but it didn't and because Daveykins is a prat, in the shitbin it goes.
Mitigating Factors: This is competent. It has issues, but it's not a bad design. If there was more gameplay here and the art style wasn't fucking trash, I could give this one a pass.

5. Depression Quest
This one sucks. It's boring, preachy, repetitive, has tons of text, is treated like it's actually something of value, and it's fucking Phil Fish levels of pretentious. It's also long as fuck and a fucking slog to play through, with music that absolutely sucks and photos which usually have no relevance and the most preachy bullshit imaginable.
Mitigating Factors: At least you have decisions to make and you have some fucking impetus on the plot in this fuckpocalypse. It's worth a million times what the top three items on this list are based on that alone.

4. Emergence
Linear and with writing that strongly suggests that it's the writer's fetish, this has an amazing idea and some interesting concepts mired under terrible execution and a bad case of "tell, don't show." A lot of potential here if the developer could pull his head out of his own ass, flesh the game out, and give the player more control.
Mitigating Factors: It's not any of the lower items on this list and in particular it's better-written than the next entry.

3. T-Runner
When your game's credits feature a slam against the Kiwi Farms and special thanks towards Nora Reed, you know you're going to have something special, but if that was unintentional foreshadowing, than T-Runner is irony served in its own juices. "Worst endless runner in the history of video games" barely does it justice. I'm the only person who ever bought a copy of it and I'm glad nobody else has to suffer from this fucking boring pile of fetish-driven refuse. Mark Boyd originally was surprisingly humble about it, and even civil, but quickly trooned out, and now the game is free-to-play. He has yet to fix the fucking menu problems that keep the game from being played on Windows 8 platforms without work-arounds.
Mitigating Factors: Anyone who's ever had questions over whether or not Mark Boyd is an autogynephile need only play through this game. As your character will be triggered and DIE if she makes contact with innocuous words like Dude, things like footballs, and the Male symbol, that's unintentional comedy. Her being killed by massive disembodied penises with huge, swollen testicles, however, pretty much establishes that Mark Boyd has a litany of psychiatric problems and deserves neither praise nor respect. Girl Dick indeed.

2. Hackers Vs Banksters
This game features the most unlikable shits ever, whose lives you have to manage because they're too fucking broken to do anything right while they fucking write for buzzfeed and plan revenge on a local bank because fight the power or something. With a plot that vanishes up its own ass about halfway through because the initial problem of "no money for groceries" had been addressed, and a story of unfocused revenge that frankly makes everyone involved look more autistic than Chris, this game is a rare breed of shit that made me lament the times when Bubsy 3D was the extent of my shit games knowledge. The fact that you have to manage the characters' triggers and eating disorder without any ability to do anything about it, to the point where the game takes you aside to explain that their problems can't be fixed is the kind of thing that made me intentionally try to find a fail state that got everyone involved murdered. I did not find one.
Mitigating Factors: It's that bad, where it becomes comical and easy to make fun of. With no artistic consistency and a plot that makes no sense, the only thing that's redeemable about this is that it's so easy to mock, and that wears off really fast.

1. Patriarchy Simulator 2000
@hood LOLCOW once asked me what the worst SJW/Rat King game I played was. At the time, he asked me if Nora's was the worst. I responded with stating that Nora's "game" doesn't really qualify as one, being more an example of complete failure than anything else. To date, this is the only game that I've reviewed for this site that left me with absolutely nothing of substance to review, to the point where I had to acquire screengrabs from a Touhou fangame and pretended that was the game I was actually reviewing in order to make up for the missing funny. Nora legitimately thinks this game is worth actually paying money over, to boot, so just as Nora is the most disgusting part of the Rat King, she's also got the honor of being the maker of the worst game I've thus far reviewed for this website, a title she will hold forevermore, because I doubt there is anyone else to have released something this threadbare and then tried to charge for it.
Mitigating Factors: None.

 

[alex_theman]

Hey @Jaimas, last link points to Hackers V Banksters.

 

[Jaimas]

Hey @Jaimas, last link points to Hackers V Banksters.

Thanks for the heads-up. It's fixed now.