Do you ever just look at porn and cry?
True & Honest Fan
Most of Tumblr's userbase consists of teen and 20-something genderspecials. However, the occasional schizoid older dude pops up, and such is the case of Stone-Man-Warrior, real name Kelly Karl Sleight. Born in 1961, the divorced Sleight lives in Grants Pass, Oregon and spends an inordinate amount of time spewing his crazy fantasies on Tumblr.
Most of his delusions involve paramilitary "terror cells" sent to kill him or disturb his mental health. He accuses his state's governor, Democrat Kate Brown, of being responsible for many of them... but also claims he recently killed the very-much-alive Brown, among others. His neighbors' children are among the "child soldiers" recruited into these terror cells.
Not sure why his blathering frequently involves African lions, but apparently they're part of the "Safari terror cell."
If you want to see where the Kate Brown story goes, expand at your own sanity's peril:
There are almost no pictures of Sleight on the internet; this was the most recent from nearly a decade ago.
Like most paranoid schizophrenics, Stone-Man-Warrior believes everyone around him is engaged in a conspiracy of global proportions with him as the target. His delusions involve being attacked at home on a daily basis by "terror soldiers" sent by nebulous evil forces, who may or may not be Kate Brown depending on the day.
...those are called neighbors. And what is he on about with the Nitrous Oxide?
If people are stealing stuff from your shed, call the cops? But somehow I doubt anything actually happened to the shit in his shed.
He thinks the US military is on his side, but state and local authorities are out to get him for some reason. The Screen Actors' Guild, mentioned earlier as the "SAGCoup Global Domination Crusades of Death" is one of many villains in Stone-Man-Warrior's bizarre universe, and is conspiring with many in government to wreak havoc upon the world:
In addition to Tumblr, Stone-Man-Warrior has been periodically active on Twitter as well. His accounts rarely last very long, but he posts more of the same paranoid nonsense as he does on Tumblr.
I screencapped some stuff from his last Twitter before it got taken down:
I have no idea how his brain is making these connections, but it's hilarious. He thinks carrying a lighter with him can protect him from the "terror soldiers" aka Walmart greeters:
In addition to what you've already seen, Stone-Man-Warrior insists there's an implant in his jaw that records and transmits every word he says and that most of his neighbors have been replaced by terrorist actors.
I'll link his Twitter if/when he remakes it. For now, his only known social media account is his Tumblr (archive).