Stupid things you thought as a kid - we were all dumbasses when we were kids

Bender

The greatest robot fighter of all time
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
My fucking father told me that with a streight face, and re-enforced it too as I got a bit older. He thought it was the funniest fucking thing in the world when I tried to tell my friends this little fact about cows. (strawberry tard cum didn't really exist where i was at the time) 20 years later, he tried to pull that same shit with my daughter and I shut him down fast. He had the nerve to call me a spoilsport.
That is the the daddiest of dad pranks and it's fucking hilarious.
 

MerriedxReldnahc

World's Okay-est Proctologist
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
When I was 8, my dad convinced me that asian women had slanted vaginas.
I believed him until I was 14
One of my Facebook aquaintances swears up and down that he owns an authentic photo of an asian woman with a sideways vagina, but he just can't share it lest he get the FB banhammer. Apparently there is such a thing known as a "3 o'clock pussy" where it is tilted.
 

The Last Stand

I'm thankful that ladies like Joan existed.
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
One of my Facebook aquaintances swears up and down that he owns an authentic photo of an asian woman with a sideways vagina, but he just can't share it lest he get the FB banhammer. Apparently there is such a thing known as a "3 o'clock pussy" where it is tilted.
Reminds me. I thought women literally shit out children.
 

AnaV

I fell for bait and should get capital punishment
kiwifarms.net
Genuinely believed my folks could get accurate and extremely detailed web logs from just calling our ISP provider.
Reminds me. I thought women literally shit out children.
I thought women pissed out their ass and gave birth through their belly button, you're smarter than me.
 
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Exist0

ChuckleHead
kiwifarms.net
Got a couple. Word filter will be fun.
Used to think that because ladies made milk from their boobies, men made water.

Before I started school I watched the movie "Young Einstein" a shit load. According to that movie, Albert Einstein grew up on a apple farm in Tasmania and became famous for putting bubbles in beer. I argued so hard with my grade 1 teacher about Einstein.

My father always said I'd get square eyes from staring at the TV too much, I put cardboard and foil around it to make a circle. No square eyes
 

Smaug's Smokey Hole

Sweeney did nothing wrong.
kiwifarms.net
I also thought professional wrestling was real. I would think: How are they still alive after being hit by a chair?

I read a Don Martin comic where they showed that wrestlers got a small hole drilled into their forehead where a fake blood ampule could be placed, like a magic trick. Somehow seemed more reasonable than cutting yourself with a razor.
 

albert chan

I am a beautiful dark twisted kiwi
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
I used to joke around as a teenager thinking that if you get rid of guns in America, then there won’t be any more wars.

Now I see more black people either killing or pistol whipping other black people or cops in daylight/evening.
 

Heartmoth

Daisymaes Husbind
kiwifarms.net
I thought that syrians were aliens who hoarded guns and looked like this. Prolly just listened to too much rush Limbaugh as a kid.
Dug_full_body.png
 
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Save the Loli

kiwifarms.net
When I was a kid I never ate jelly donuts and my mom never bought them for me, so I thought the onigiri on Pokemon which the 4kids dub called jelly donuts were actually what jelly donuts looked like IRL and I was really confused when someone offered me jelly donuts somewhere and it looked nothing like that. But I was happy when I saw a white jelly donut that looked like an onigiri, but then I ate it and thought it was nasty compared to other donuts.
 
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