Stupid things you thought as a kid - we were all dumbasses when we were kids

Tiny Clanger

True & Honest Fan
I thought if you looked down drains you'd be able to see Australia. I tried. A lot. (Since then I have discovered Dynastia and am profoundly thankful 'straya never looked back.)

And I thought spring meant huge bumble-bees on springs bounced around on the snow.

And that burglars were ekectrical plugs with legs who wore a flat-cap and held a spanner.

I think I might've been a bit odd.

Kiwi Lime Pie

The tasteful summer treat. 🥝🥧🐈
When i was 5 i thought if you didn't have a chimney, santa just knocked on the door.
I was told he sent a fairy through the letterbox to unlock the door for him so he can walk in like he didn't just commit a crime.
i asked my dad once how Santa got in since we didint have a chimney. said he used magic and got through the oven instead.
My grandma said Santa had a master passkey that allowed him to enter any house without a chimney -- hers included because the chimney had been boarded over and rendered unusable. I'm surprised she didn't claim he put them in the milk chute.

Spastic Colon

Awww - yeah - tism
True & Honest Fan
I thought I could figure out if the electrical fence was on by touching it with a blade of grass. I thought it would burn the grass. That's how I learned about electrical conductivity.

I thought that there were Indians (in traditional Native American dress, I assumed) running around the mountains. My dad told us that the "Watch for Fallen Rocks" sign was about an Indian dude named "Fallen Rocks" who would run out into the road sometimes. My dad thought it was funny to tell us outrageous stories. I was obviously a dumb kid and believed it. I always kept an eye out for an Indian man when we were driving through the mountains.


Ki ki ki ma ma ma
After I saw episode of Arthur titled more I believed for years a bank account would grow and grow on it's own (there's a scene where the tibble twins show off theirs and give this rudimentary explanation about how they work) and was always asking my parents to open one for me.

Well as an adult I know better and while a savings account does technically grow with interest most of that comes from money deposited into the checking account and that's if you have it to begin with.

Also when I was kid and learned colonel Sanders was a real person I wanted to meet him and thank him for inventing KFC...then I found out he died before I was even born and that's how I learned what death is.


welcome to god's mosh pit
My parents loved taking me to Carl Sandburg's property as a kid, and I had no idea who he was. His name, however, was very similar (at least to my five year old ears) as Colonel Sanders, and so I thought it was his house. I was always confused as to why they only talked about some books and poems that he'd written, why his house wasn't in Kentucky, and why they didn't mention the fact that he made chicken.