SUPER EXCITING PURCHASE! - 8/28/2019 - (Day 71 of this 100-Day Nightmare)

Jul 5, 2019

Will update with recap. Edit: RECAP!

SUPER EXCITING PURCHASE! - 8/28/2019 (Day 71 of this 100-Day Nightmare)
Because I hate myself and my blood pressure enough to watch these "inscrutiateen" videos so YOU DON'T HAVE TO:

- "I'm a little swollen when I first wake up" (No, you're swollen ALL THE TIME, SwollenLynn!)

- Reminder of DOLLAR TREE HAUL fake flowers (that we all know Necky bought since Hamber can't fit inside a Dollar Tree and there's no scooters)

- "Window seel" (WORDS MEAN THINGS. Moving on.)

- About to eat "first meal" (brief shot of dem toes for the fetishists out there).

- SUBWAY FOOTLONG! Multi-grain bread, lettuce, turkey, olive, onion, and "light mayonnaise". (Not gonna mookbong it?)

- Hamber is SUPER EXCITED. (Must the titular purchase, and we're only ONE minute in?)

- Hamber is briefly amazed that cats (unlike her) can JUMP.

- Hamber has previously used a FitBit. And has purchased an Apple Watch. Marvel at its charging capabilities! Its black band!

- A "move goal" can be set with the Apple Watch of how many calories you want to burn!

- Hamber has set the lofty goal of 500 caloreez even though "everyone burns calories naturally just sitting and doing absolutely nothing" (clearly her TRUE goal).

- Wait wait wait, she just claimed she burns 2800 calories from her DOING NOTHING, but has set a goal of "an extra 500" via the watch? Thanks, MathLynn!

- Eric in his Pokemon onesie pajamas. Is she trying to "get back at him" for him recording her in his vlogs? (Obviously not the recent one, but he does frequently do it, even however long ago this video was in the timeline.)

- "Eric is down weight, y'all!" (JealousLynn is not, y'all!)

- Hamber learned about "incognito mode" on YouTube today and tries to FLEX dat knowledge on Eric while trying to shame his YouTube watching habits and calls him a LAH.

Comment from "EAT WITH ME | CAN'T SATISFY EVERYONE" from 3,357 comments: "Omg...cook your food by yourself! And you won't have a problem with sodium."
Response: Yes, you CAN watch your sodium if you're cooking but it depends on what you're cooking. Thanks for the "advice" and "constructive criticism". (She will still not cook anything.)

- Shelf-ass pats herself for doing this new segment TWO DAYS IN A ROW (despite the fact that videos will likely stop entirely in 4 more videos)!

TL;DR: It's the Apple Watch we already saw her wearing in the more-up-to-date Eric video! SKIP.
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Hamberlard Raid

All is full of love, except troons
True & Honest Fan
Nov 25, 2018
Mascara or death?


Let’s go fill the Internet with crime, come on!
True & Honest Fan
Mar 15, 2019
I thought I was so clever for predicting that this video would be yet another “look what I bought!!!” but then I realized she only has like three types of videos anyways...So much for wanting to express all your creative new ideas, Amber.