Super Smash Bros Ultimate 07/12/2018 - Autistic Megapowers Collide

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Pubic Enemy #1

Oi m8 wot if ur mam was an email
kiwifarms.net
Just 2 days to go until the DSPhere and the Smash Community combine to create what could potentially be a supermassive black hole of autism, so I thought this had enough potential for its own thread.

In the meantime, let's speculate. Has DSP's hateboner for Nintendo subsided with their recent relaxing over copyright claims? Will he still get claimed anyway because of the massive amount of classic vidya music in the game? It's a fighting game, so he'll be salty - but how salty will he be? Will he fall afoul of some of the more "enthusiastic" Smash fans out there? Will he get streamsniped by Sakurai? Most importantly of all, how long before he completely ragequits A) the online mode and B) the game altogether. Place your bets, folks! Correct answers get a gay sticker.
 

Slamerella

If I won't do it, then who will?
kiwifarms.net
Never forget the man complained about falling off a stage after using Bowser's Bowser Bomb Special, because "what kind of a stage is one you fall off of?"
What a simple man.
 
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Wurstbrot

Basic Understanding Of Time
kiwifarms.net
Online play? Wasn't his plan to play the story mode cuz he's a scared piggy? It will go the usual:
Stares at the screen in silence, dropped inputs, kahman totally unearned, scrubs who abuse lag, I didn't pressed that button, could not blahk, uuuuuurg, this is bullshit man, do they know how to make games? Fuck you Nintendo, snort, I dunno the combos so it's unfair, this opponent is hooorrible. Everything you expect from Street Fighter but the additional hate for Nintendo. Also some "$20 per month for this garbage, everyone! Full price title!" (it's 20/year).
Dave never reinvents himself. This would mean he learned something.

Nintendo could also claim his videos for the rest of the year cuz they announced the change for 2019. Maybe they will show some heart and already act according to their future plan. I hope they won't, just so Dave can roll in his own feces again.

He will ragequit as soon as he makes no money on Smash anymore. With some luck, after the very first week.
 

Wing Zero

kiwifarms.net
As Nintendo's online services are notoriously awful I imagine he's got those excuses pre-ordered.
Also, Sakurai told people in the last Smash direct to get an ethernet adapter for their Switch is they plan to play a lot of online. Do we know if Phil has one or not?
 

Martys_not_smarty

kiwifarms.net
Speaking of adapters does anyone have a good recommendation for one? Asking for a friend of a friend and rather rely on some testimonial from a person.
 

Pubic Enemy #1

Oi m8 wot if ur mam was an email
kiwifarms.net
He’s gonna do the same shit that he does to every online multiplayer game he touches... Drag out the story mode for as long as humanly possible to limit the time in which he plays online, or puts it off entirely.
He'll go through the DSP cycle as with every other fighting game.
  1. Pick a slow heavy character and learn a simple pattern in the single player.
  2. Use this simple pattern to cruise past the lowly-ranked scrubs who've never played Smash before and act like he's hot shit.
  3. Start to lose a few matches as he's gradually matched with better players. Suddenly, these mystical connection issues will start to appear out of nowhere.
  4. Hit his hard skill cap and lose more than he wins. Online lag tactics everywhere now. His scrub pattern is now completely ineffective.
  5. Go on an extended losing streak during one session and ragequit the game as a result.
This normally takes about 7-10 days all told. As Smash has more single player content than most fighting games this might sustain him for a bit longer, but I see him ragequitting online play within a week.
 

samovski

feelsoldman
kiwifarms.net
Oh he's definitely lost the hate for them atm. The idea of making money off another platform? It's like a wet dream for him. But the second he gets a claim off them it'll all start back up again. While I hope as a whole this works out well for Twitch and YT so more people can play and stream Nintendo games, a little part of me hopes he gets claimed day 1.

It would just be perfect. We all know how it's gonna go, dropped inputs, "didn't do that", I was blocking (don't know if smash has blocking never played). At some point he's going to insult the devs and the fanbase. We'll see I guess, but I ain't expecting much from this whole thing.
 
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ZehnBoat

What do Johnny Cash and Devo have in common?
kiwifarms.net
Also, Sakurai told people in the last Smash direct to get an ethernet adapter for their Switch is they plan to play a lot of online. Do we know if Phil has one or not?
lol that's extra work and shit to buy
so you know the answer is no
 

Homaster

kiwifarms.net
Also, Sakurai told people in the last Smash direct to get an ethernet adapter for their Switch is they plan to play a lot of online. Do we know if Phil has one or not?
I believe he got one for ultra street fighter 2 when that came out, i remember him boasting about it in a video
 

This+

kiwifarms.net
I have a feeling he's gonna get bodied by a Down+B spammer and say that's cheap online tactics.
 

BeanBidan

Welcome to Silent Hill faggots.
kiwifarms.net
Apparently Sephiroth is going to be playable? No doubt he'll complain about weapon length and hitboxes.

He will then cry when people use zoning characters. He will cry because the lag although I'd give him a pass on that since smash is notorious for having shit servers and I doubt that will change.
He's going to cry about ledge attackers because they won't let him back on, will cry about characters with counter moves. Basically everything.
 

Comma

kiwifarms.net
The game is being received very well: 94 on Metacritic, 93 on Opencritic. Will young Philip throw the opinions of the professional gaming journalists he loves so much aside, and shout "This game sucks!" at some point?

Oh, and btw: a lot of reviews are saying the singleplayer mode is, among other things, "challenging", "difficult" and "complicated". So I guess that has the potential to turn into a session of
chill_comfy_gaming_10percent.png
 
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