Super Smash Bros. -


Totally not evil
Honestly, it's times like this that I miss the Salt Mine subforum the most.
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Sir Toasty ended up deleting this tweet and apologizing for "acting in the heat of the moment" :story:
They really have no concept of the sheer amount of bullshit the meleefags cause for everyone else at events, do they? They have to realize that the jokes about smashers stinking like hobos, shitting themselves to throw off opponents, putting hands through hotel walls, trying to run people over, refusing to vacate casual setups when organizers need them to run matches for people that Paid to be there, gesticulate wildly about how deep a 20 year old game with like 6 viable characters is compared to everything else, and almost always have their top-16’s and 8’s go over by like an hour and screwing everyone else over give ample reason talk shit. I think I left my PC for like half an hour a few games into the Melee grand finals match at EVO to get some snacks before Tekken started; and they were still going when I got back. Also, fuck you for talking shit about Under Night. Everyone and their mother’s been saying they deserved a place on the main stage for years.
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Tanner Glass
Also never forget that Melee, if it were featured in 2019, would be the only game with the following requirements/issues (compared to all other featured games)

Rounds can last for 8 minutes (compared to 99 seconds in traditional games). Melee also has some characters with huge mobility that cannot be stopped from running out the clock, meaning a "stall out" round can last nearly 6 minutes. Melee players typically prefer to play "Best of 5" meaning that a single "set" can run 40 minutes. I'm not sure if EVO runs Bo5, Bo3, or single elimination but it's still very long.
Melee must be played on a Nintendo Gamecube, meaning it's incompatible with most broadcast/streaming equipment (The PS3, PS4, PC, and any other console in TYOOL 2019 uses HDMI). It means that EVO (+ other tournies) must keep, maintain, and update a full second set of broadcast equipment.
Competitive Melee must be played on a CRT television, although all sponsored EVO equipment (and most other tournaments) use low-latency IPS computer monitors that only have HDMI/Displayport inputs. Fancy older ones might have VGA or DVI, but no one that sponsors Fighting Game Tournaments makes a product that takes A/V cables. I can't remember the last time I saw a CRT TV for sale, even in a fucking Walmart. These must be bought because the sponsor cannot and will not provide them for you.
Competitive Melee players primairly use a first party gamecube controller with a specific manufacturing defect. These are alleged to be a 1 in 50 or 1 in 100 (or 1% or 2%) on a controller that is generally no longer manufactured (and hasn't been in years). There's a small re-release with each smash brothers, but there's no data on the defect on the "new" batch. EVO (and other tournies) are not able to keep spares on hand and it isn't uncommon for Melee Pros to forget their controller and drop out of the tournament, which is really exciting for fans.
Melee is so unfun and the community is so toxic that new players don't bother to pick up the game (and will pick up other games) meaning that most melee Top 8s have been identical for a number of years. There are no upsets, there is no "MenaRD wins Capcom Cup" or "Sonicfox comes out of no where and wins tournies", it's the same top tier players (Leffen, Hungrybox, Mew2King, etc) winning the same tournaments using the same characters on the same stages. You are more likely to see an upset watching competitive Catherine or Tetris.
Melee (and all smash games) drive 0 support from the game's creator to the fighting game tournaments. Nintendo does not give a shit about it, where as Capcom, Namco, Arksys, and even fucking ATLUS provide direct support through money for prize pools, added modes, custom stages, sponsorship, league integration, and advertising.


Politics are fucking dumb
True & Honest Fan
Also never forget that Melee, if it were featured in 2019, would be the only game with the following requirements/issues (compared to all other featured games)

Pat was asking for and retweeting all kinds of “Melee is dead” memes all night last night, it was amazing. I can’t wait for the next podcast.
Reactions: Agent Wet

I have been sick and tired of every fighting tournament featuring Smash bending over backwards for Melee's fans ever since Brawl came out. They are some of the most entitled, whiny bitches to come out of a fandom and I feel like they're finally getting what they've long deserved. I hope other fighting tournaments have the nerve to bring in Ultimate and boot Melee out as well.


Epic Gamer Time
Because they have the same mentality as Chris Chan and believe that Lynx body spray can properly replace showers. Mentally, they're like 13
Nah, I'd say they're about 12 mentally, considering they scream like kids did when they played Call of Duty back in the day.


It's time for assembly...FROM HELL!!!
I had a pretty good feeling that Melee was gonna get the boot from EVO after Ultimate came out. Not only does it let Ultimate have a chance to stand on its own, but it also allows for other fighting games to be featured as well.

Plus without getting caught up on the drama, lately I've been finding competitive Ultimate to be more entertaining to watch compared to Melee. It's pretty clear that Melee is on the decline now despite all the denial in the Smash community, especially Melee's.
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