Taking bets for Jonathan's fate -

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What is Jonathan's fate?


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AnOminous

Really?
True & Honest Fan
Retired Staff
kiwifarms.net
He is too much of narcissist to actually kill him self on purpose.

My first bet is accidental death by screwing up a fake suicide.
Second bet is murdered via a angry parent or gang consisting of minority groups he has offended.


Though seeing how cucked the west is becoming, he will likely end up as prime minister of Canada.
My first bet is cirrhosis. Or multiple organ failure in general.
 

Vagivagal Syncope

kiwifarms.net
I really doubt he'd off himself. Offing himself would immediately close the book on him. In Canadian mainstream news, a suicide often goes unreported, or is reported as a footnote in some other related news. It's been that way for years. No news org wants to be the one that published the story that convinced a whole bunch of Incel Trans folk to off themselves.

He's getting virtually no mainstream media attention, so he's fighting with the whole "news of the moment" social media news sources. Those sources post all kinds of weird stuff all over the world, every second of every day. If Jon even stops for a minute, his story just kinda flies by and fades, only to be taken up by whatever else is going on in the world.

No news media with any real repeatability or permanence is covering him. I bet that's what he's trying to break through.

Ask yourself what you think he'd do to break through and achieve news-worthiness over time. Is he capable of it? If not, he'll fade away. If he is, it will likely be heinous and the act itself with be reported on - everything else will be thrown out.
 

Junkail

kiwifarms.net

Weeb Slinger

kiwifarms.net
I fully expect Jonathan Yaniv to steer his mobility scooter along the slimy trail left behind by Courtney Love and adopt the physical properties of a virulent un-killable bacteria that has assumed the approximate form of a human being: A fleshy katamari, composed of clumping co-morbidities, and resistant to all known social antibiotics, who eventually grows so large that he places the kind of strain upon the local healthcare infrastructure that is ordinarily only experienced during serious pandemics.

Despite his menagerie of real and imagined illnesses, Yaniv will not die. He is destined to become the clinically obese boulder that society must repeatedly push up the hill, as he shrieks about his pronouns and coerces vulnerable, religious women of colour into placing their hands in the approximate region of his genitalia, while hissing aggressively racist imprecations at them under his laboured breath.

The cycle of lawsuits, skirmishes along the fringes of the law and miscellaneous incidents, that will draw mostly negative attention and earn him a semi-permanent spot in the 'local man' section of the press, will continue for as long as the rarefied oxygen of Canadian tolerance is farted out through the doors of the country's parliament and social institutions.

A wildcard is how much influence Miriam Yaniv has over her son, and whether she might eventually consider moving him to another area of Canada, or out of the country altogether.

Nobody will ever voluntarily have sex with Jonathan. There will be no Yaniv junior, inhabiting any of the 71 possible genders, to carry his bright flame into the latter half of the 21st century.
 

FinnKitty

kiwifarms.net
A wildcard is how much influence Miriam Yaniv has over her son, and whether she might eventually consider moving him to another area of Canada, or out of the country altogether.
My knowledge of Canada is pretty limited, but isn't BC a leftist paradise compared to some based enclaves? Then again, Quebec also seems to hate the immigrants.
 
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Alba gu brath

kiwifarms.net
My knowledge of Canada is pretty limited, but isn't BC a leftist paradise compared to some based enclaves? Then again, Quebec also seems to hate the immigrants.
Yeah, from what I can remember, take with a grain of salt here as well, Quebec is more right wing, their French identitarians ain't been left for good wee while.
"Oh huu, wve cannot hav dhese peoples coming here and not speaking ze French! Qu!"
 

Spastic Colon

I feel pretty
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
After losing in the HRT and being warned to not file any more claims, he has to abandon his get rich quick scheme of extorting businesses. He still tries to put on a brave lesbian/human rights advocate face for his 3 genuine twitter fans, but eventually drops off social media and everyone forgets him until the next time a troon makes the news and the "wax my balls" guy gets brought up. For a while he tries his hand at phone sex work, but finds that the only people interested in hearing Elmo talk dirty to them are other pedo troons like himself. He is depressed because he was certain that the Elmo voice would lure a young girl in eventually so he could deflower her (only with a tampon since he hasn't actually seen his penis in a few years and is concerned that it may have actually fallen off) and continues his downward spiral.

Mama Yaniv continues to nag and berate him because so and so at the synagogue was bragging about her son the doctor again and she's stuck with an exceptional individual troon that makes her look like the bad mother that she really is. One day, Yaniv snaps and kills his mother in a fit of rage when Mama Yaniv takes him to task for wasting more money on 38D bras when she knows damn well that he wears a 50 AA. He beats her to death with his pink cane and may or may not run over her a few times with the scooty puff just to be sure.

About six months later, someone in the synagogue finally feels guilty that they have been enjoying the vacation from the unpleasant Mama Yaniv and her defective offspring (which everyone is certain must have been a result of infidelity with a goy because no one of Trump's Chosen People wants to claim Johnny boy as part of the gene pool) and gets the police to do a wellness check. They find him in his condo with the body of Mama Yaniv, a mummified corpse of a dog, and human body parts in the freezer that may or may not be the aunt that no one has seen for quite a while.

Ogre -- in an effort to protect the wholesome troon image -- manages to get a total media blackout on the Yaniv affair in exchange for convincing Johnny to fess up to his crimes. Jon does -- but only after he gets it in writing that he can be housed in the women's prison because "love is ageless" or some other rainbow-ism. He ends up dying in prison when he drops the soap in the shower and the massive exertion to bend over to pick it up causes him to stroke out. Sadly, he never did get to see tits and pussy out in the shower as he was always escorted to the showers when there would be no real women there. His final moments involve making eye contact with the brown female guard (is she Sikh?) who decides to take her 30 minute lunch break before reporting Jon's medical emergency. The only people who mourn his loss are the few people here who remember his glory days of mass producing tard cum because the media still maintains its Yaniv blackout and no one else realizes he is dead.
 

MightyBiteySnake

DEPRESSED SNAKE DEPRESSED SNAKE
kiwifarms.net
Narcissists never kill themselves but Johnny boy might fake it for attention.

Imo the most likely outcome is that he lives way longer than anyone could imagine and he becomes the next generation of Kiwis' Tommy Tooter.

He'll be an occasionally homeless, child/animal molesting old man who insists he's a woman and begs on the street
 

Junkail

kiwifarms.net
Narcissists never kill themselves but Johnny boy might fake it for attention.

Imo the most likely outcome is that he lives way longer than anyone could imagine and he becomes the next generation of Kiwis' Tommy Tooter.

He'll be an occasionally homeless, child/animal molesting old man who insists he's a woman and begs on the street
Would we still be looking at him at that point? I can't see anyone paying attention to a fat pedo for more than a decade.
 

MightyBiteySnake

DEPRESSED SNAKE DEPRESSED SNAKE
kiwifarms.net
Would we still be looking at him at that point? I can't see anyone paying attention to a fat pedo for more than a decade.
I expect most (relatively) healthy lolcows to outlive this web domain/specific community. When I say "the next generation of Kiwis'" I mean more so whatever group in the future carries the torch if laughing at weirdos on the internet
 

Alba gu brath

kiwifarms.net
Yaniv is too narcissistic to neck himself. I see him going the Phil route and just being an obscure potato tranny that everyone forgets about but us. Death By Obscurity.
Aye, idiot was baiting it for ages, if you're going for long jump and a short fall, you're not exactly going to be highlighting it for the whole world. Though considering the head case that Jon is..
 
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Ted Gazynski

kiwifarms.net
Hopefully his lawsuits all get tossed out, but I’m not too optimistic that he’ll face any serious consequences for his disgusting behaviour. He seems like too much of a delusional narcissist to off himself and I doubt he goes out in public enough for immigrants to get him, so he’ll probably just rot away and seek attention on the internet until everybody forgets he ever existed.
 
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