Tell us about that time you got sweet sweet revenge on someone - Post your best revenge story

[W00K #17]

"When fortune smiles on something as violent and ugly as revenge, it seems proof like no other that not only does God exist, you're doing his will."

Has someone ever fucked you over, really done you wrong, bent you over and went in dry? Have you ever gotten them back, in the most glorious way? Perhaps a school bully, douchebag coworker, or someone who once was a friend.

Tell the farms about it. We (I) want to hear your stories.

 

[Rand /pol/]

Kicked your mother in the stomach when she was pregnant with you because she gave me an STD.

 

[W00K #17]

Kick your mother in the stomach when she was pregnant with you because she gave me an STD.

For the last time dude you got that shit from a toilet seat. Please leave my ma alone it's been years

 

[A Hot Potato]

I'll fucking rape and murder @W00K #17 for being a dummy and making this shitty thread.

 

[The Fool]

38“You have heard that it was said, ‘Eye for eye, and tooth for tooth.’ h 39But I tell you, do not resist an evil person. If anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to them the other cheek also. 40And if anyone wants to sue you and take your shirt, hand over your coat as well. 41If anyone forces you to go one mile, go with them two miles. 42Give to the one who asks you, and do not turn away from the one who wants to borrow from you. 43“You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor i and hate your enemy.’ 44But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, 45that you may be children of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. 46If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? 47And if you greet only your own people, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that? 48Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect.

 

[A Hot Potato]

38“You have heard that it was said, ‘Eye for eye, and tooth for tooth.’ h 39But I tell you, do not resist an evil person. If anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to them the other cheek also. 40And if anyone wants to sue you and take your shirt, hand over your coat as well. 41If anyone forces you to go one mile, go with them two miles. 42Give to the one who asks you, and do not turn away from the one who wants to borrow from you. 43“You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor i and hate your enemy.’ 44But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, 45that you may be children of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. 46If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? 47And if you greet only your own people, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that? 48Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect.

And that's why you are a cuck and I fucked your fucking mom.

 

[AnOminous]

There was this baby that wouldn't stop crying so I shook it until it had brain damage and now it's an SJW.

 

[Guts Gets Some]

Years and years and years back, I deleted some idiot's Youtube account because they gave me the password after I made a fake new identity for MSN Messenger and said my grandpa died, and please upload this dummy video for me on my account to distract you. "I need your password too if I give you mine.... to prove I can trust you."

And yeah, she did. Then after finishing, she sent me one more message "Um.... *poke* you deleted my account."


Long story at what prompted this, and I've mostly forgotten, actually. But it felt pretty good. Her channel was full of dumb shit like "Nostradamus warned us about Bush" and the like. Pretty worth it.

 

[W00K #17]

Years and years and years back, I deleted some idiot's Youtube account because they gave me the password after I made a fake new identity for MSN Messenger and said my grandpa died, and please upload this dummy video for me on my account to distract you. "I need your password too if I give you mine.... to prove I can trust you."

And yeah, she did. Then after finishing, she sent me one more message "Um.... *poke* you deleted my account."


Long story at what prompted this, and I've mostly forgotten, actually. But it felt pretty good. Her channel was full of dumb shit like "Nostradamus warned us about Bush" and the like. Pretty worth it.

She wasn't wrong though.

 

[Bob Page]

Some aspie was being annoying in HS talking about his gary stu comic hero. The teachers didn't do shit. When class was dismissed, I had to stay a bit because of the aforementioned issue. Aspie left his comic stuff behind. So, I took it, ripped it to pieces, and flushed it all down a toilet. No one noticed but the aspie who threw a fit when he found his stuff was gone. I denied everything and never got busted.

 

[QU 734]

One time my gf wouldn't make me a sandwich because she had to go visit a dying relative or some bs so I shot her.

 

[From The Uncanny Valley]

I wrote creepy, borderline threatening messages on an old friend's YouTube account. Don't ask me why I did that, I was drunk.

 

[Keystone]

As a kid I was playing at a family member's house one time on the front lawn and wandered over to the neighbor's next door lawn for a few minutes. Neighbor's kid comes out and yells at me to get off his property. He still lives there, and to this day when I visit that family member's house or pass by it I make a point to spit on the fucker's lawn on the way out.

 

[eldri]

I'll tell you when I finish.

 

[Frogasm]

Saw a guy I didn't like fall down some stairs. No serious injuries.
I consider this a freebie.

 

[Clop]

Trinidad scorpion chili sauce is plentiful and chili is oil-based so it doesn't wash off easy, and even the smallest amount in your hand from a doorknob or a kitchen utensil sticks for a long time until you rub your eyes or jack off.

Next time, use your own toilet paper, Wang.

 

[Otis Boi]

I think my favorite had to be when a kid kept stealing my Lunch so i spiked it with laxatives for a few days straight.I remeber he ended up shitting him self in the hallways and crying i guess he went to the hosptial because no one could figure out why he was having uncontrollable shits. He is my friend now.

 

[The Shadow]

I was working at Taco Bell and this dude is eyeballing my chick. He orders a chalupa. I put it in the walk in freezer before I put it on his tray because, as the Klingons say, revenge is a dish best served cold.

What makes it sweet revenge is that he ordered cinnamon twists too.

Okay I made that whole fucking thing up.

 

[Dolphin Lundgren]

A group of girls picked on me all throughout 6th grade. One time I spit onto the binder of the one who picked on me the most and rubbed it all in when she was away from the table.
It was a small revenge move but it satisfied me.

 

[guccigash]

My thing when I was a kid, and I did this 4 times, when told no if I asked to go to the bathroom in class was just to piss myself right then and there. Did it at brownies, ballet and two different schools. My mum had told me nobody has the right to tell you you can't go to the toilet. So......

Edit- I also got so angry at my neighbours for being assholes (they genuinly were druggies drunk assholes that broke the doors, the fittngs, pissed in the hallways etc, that when they one day broke the law and there were credible witnesses to it I called the police/ASBO team and that combined with the methodical cataloguing and reporting of the vandalism by me was why they got evicted. Yay Aspergers for better neighbourhoods! I've moved now but whoever is there now doesn't have to deal with the assholes.