Tess Holliday / Ryann Maegen Hoven - Landwhale model, Body positive activist, and gigantic fraud

multiverse

Not actually Merissa OR Heather
True & Honest Fan
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Tess is not getting up to get food, she's screeching at Jolene or Bowie to get it because walking the 10 feet is too much on her fucking joints.
Exactly. Rylee isnt there to pull mama up off the couch on command any more. She's probably taught Bowie to put her shoes on, though. Who cares about potty training?

She's boredom eating all day while whining for nail techs and hair / makeup people to come over and give her free treatments for Instagram stories. Quelle surprise.
 

Chamaelirium

~* I don't actually like pizza *~
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I really hate Trump, but I also don't find that joke funny. The copy accompanying the images is real, and it is serious. Someone just altered the image for laughs. Am I just being a dud? But I must admit that I find Corona-chan imagery more visually appealing than Trump's face.
What’s funny is how much those two have in common. At least until he got elected, you could say both were D-listers wildly desperate for fame, both with a revolting appearance, both certified greasy gluttons medically obese and yet who snack on fast food all day, documented and proven to be AWFUL parents, failed marriage(s), both wear too much makeup, they are sleazebuckets who embody the worst of everything people imagine when it comes to stereotypes of Americans. The only difference is Tess has no political ambitions. Two bloated peas in the same overstuffed degenerate pea pod
 
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Angry New Ager

CLINTON 2020: "One Nation, Under a Groove..."
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More like some poor ghostwriter had to sit down with Tess long enough to get enough material to cobble together a book, of sorts. Tess is in no way intelligent or educated enough, or capable of taking on a task as solitary and frustrating as writing a book; somebody else had to do it for her.

That ghostwriter no doubt realized that anybody who takes this overhyped and overpainted deathpig seriously is not much of a reader even at the best of times, and tailored their prose accordingly. Also, one of the goals when ghostwriting somebody's autobiography is to make your writing sound as much like the subject's "voice" as possible--you want the reader to believe the subject actually wrote it because it "sounds" so much like them. Since Tess is an inarticulate, uneducated moron who latches on to whatever softball self-help clichés and catchphrases are popular at the moment, the ghostwriter's primary struggle would have been putting together a cohesive, book-length manuscript that at the same time didn't make her sound too much smarter than she actually is.

Ghostwriting autobiographies for stupid, vacuous people is hard fucking work, on a lot of different levels, and deserves combat pay.
 
More like some poor ghostwriter had to sit down with Tess long enough to get enough material to cobble together a book, of sorts. Tess is in no way intelligent or educated enough, or capable of taking on a task as solitary and frustrating as writing a book; somebody else had to do it for her.

That ghostwriter no doubt realized that anybody who takes this overhyped and overpainted deathpig seriously is not much of a reader even at the best of times, and tailored their prose accordingly. Also, one of the goals when ghostwriting somebody's autobiography is to make your writing sound as much like the subject's "voice" as possible--you want the reader to believe the subject actually wrote it because it "sounds" so much like them. Since Tess is an inarticulate, uneducated moron who latches on to whatever softball self-help clichés and catchphrases are popular at the moment, the ghostwriter's primary struggle would have been putting together a cohesive, book-length manuscript that at the same time didn't make her sound too much smarter than she actually is.

Ghostwriting autobiographies for stupid, vacuous people is hard fucking work, on a lot of different levels, and deserves combat pay.

I think it was a combination of a ghostwriter and Nick, who had been doing most of the writing on her social media posts. One of the best things to pop up when this mess was released is that her brother left a review https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/35010880-the-not-so-subtle-art-of-being-a-fat-girl and basically outed her as a liar.
 

MirnaMinkoff

Mama, nobody sends you a turd and expects to live.
True & Honest Fan
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Let me just emphasize how fucking stupid it is to have long, ratchet, fake pointy nails with a virus spreading. Handwashing ain’t going to do you much good with grimy acrylic nails, full of sticky, hard to wash crevices everywhere.

I don’t believe for a second Tess would be taking the time to use a nail brush to thoroughly scrub every nail each time she washes her hand. It’s absolutely pants on fire stupid to have nails like that right now. (I think her pointy nails look stupid and always a health hazard because she’s nasty, but it x10 worse right now)

I really hate Trump, but I also don't find that joke funny. The copy accompanying the images is real, and it is serious. Someone just altered the image for laughs. Am I just being a dud? But I must admit that I find Corona-chan imagery more visually appealing than Trump's face.
It’s really OTT that the Daily Mail is calling a photo of how every freaking virus behaves “chilling”. I guess it’s chilling if people had no idea how viruses use cells or never bothered to look at microscopic images of them. Look at the corona virus behaving like every other virus in the world!! The maps on how rapidly it spreads work just fine for scare tactics tyvm.

Daily Mail seems disappointed COVID doesn’t behave like the Ebola virus so they could make ppl shit their pants with photos of blood pouring from every orifice. “Dry cough and fever” doesn’t make for good clickbait photos or terrifying copy.
Messy Tessie is just mad that she's going to get even fatter - to the point that no amount of photoshop is going to hide it.
Idk with restaurant closures and less income fatties might start losing some weight against their will. Just not being able to eat out once or twice a day is going to cause them to lose weight.

They can lie about it all they want or pretend online they eat differently but death fats only exist at their size thanks to eating lots of cheap fast food daily. If they cant access large amounts of cheap fried foods and sugar they will lose weight.

Forcing fatties to actually cook meals at home (instead of just lying about it) will cause morbid obesity to decline. Whereas normal and average weight ppl do have to worry about putting on a few pounds due to being cooped up and snacking at home.
 
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Water-T

NOTICE ME SENPAI HANSEN!
True & Honest Fan
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Idk with restaurant closures and less income fatties might start losing some weight against their will. Just not being able to eat out once or twice a day is going to cause them to lose weight.

They can lie about it all they want or pretend online they eat differently but death fats only exist at their size thanks to eating lots of cheap fast food daily. If they cant access large amounts of cheap fried foods and sugar they will lose weight.

Forcing fatties to actually cook meals at home (instead of just lying about it) will cause morbid obesity to decline. Whereas normal and average weight ppl do have to worry about putting on a few pounds due to being cooped up and snacking at home.
Most fast food places have closed their dining areas, but many of them are still doing carry out, drive through, and even delivery. I'm sure Tess's feeder fetishists are more than happy to shell out a little extra cash to make sure she provides the fap content they need.
 

BIG DADDY

kiwifarms.net
Let me just emphasize how fucking stupid it is to have long, ratchet, fake pointy nails with a virus spreading. Handwashing ain’t going to do you much good with grimy acrylic nails, full of sticky, hard to wash crevices everywhere.

I don’t believe for a second Tess would be taking the time to use a nail brush to thoroughly scrub every nail each time she washes her hand. It’s absolutely pants on fire stupid to have nails like that right now. (I think her pointy nails look stupid and always a health hazard because she’s nasty, but it x10 worse right now)


It’s really OTT that the Daily Mail is calling a photo of how every freaking virus behaves “chilling”. I guess it’s chilling if people had no idea how viruses use cells or never bothered to look at microscopic images of them. Look at the corona virus behaving like every other virus in the world!! The maps on how rapidly it spreads work just fine for scare tactics tyvm.

Daily Mail seems disappointed COVID doesn’t behave like the Ebola virus so they could make ppl shit their pants with photos of blood pouring from every orifice. “Dry cough and fever” doesn’t make for good clickbait photos or terrifying copy.

Idk with restaurant closures and less income fatties might start losing some weight against their will. Just not being able to eat out once or twice a day is going to cause them to lose weight.

They can lie about it all they want or pretend online they eat differently but death fats only exist at their size thanks to eating lots of cheap fast food daily. If they cant access large amounts of cheap fried foods and sugar they will lose weight.

Forcing fatties to actually cook meals at home (instead of just lying about it) will cause morbid obesity to decline. Whereas normal and average weight ppl do have to worry about putting on a few pounds due to being cooped up and snacking at home.
I think it depends if stores are all sold out of coke and potato chips. Fast food is obv a major factor, but I’ve known people who are pretty obese by having low activity + 4-5 sodas a day + a full-size bag of Lay + cookies/bags of cheese/beer. I think some fats will definitely lose weight from this, but not any of our cows, who will do anything from bumming money off Patreon to porn to hitting up companies for mail-order food in exchange for Instagram promotion like Tess does. Never discount the ability of an addict to get their fix.

Also lol. Tess, Chantal, Jay, Corissa, and their entire lot will eat uncooked pasta from a box and full sticks of butter before trying to home cook more than like one meal a month. The bar is so low but I really do think they’re that lazy.
 

multiverse

Not actually Merissa OR Heather
True & Honest Fan
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I'm fat phobic 24/7, I don't need a pandemic for it to happen.
The privilege oozing from these fats is kind of unreal. Their biggest concern is that people are trying to maintain healthy weights and be physically active during this time?

You know reality hasn't hit them yet because they aren't crying about not being able to afford takeout, or about how the grocery stores don't have any Pringles (or almost anything else right now - hell, the local stores are low on FLOUR right now, let alone premade bread).