Of course she reads here. We're her biggest fans.Weren't we just talking about how she hadn't been to pilates in awhile? And now she's back...
Tess Holliday / Ryann Maegen Hoven - Landwhale model, Body positive activist, and gigantic fraud
- Thread starter BILLY MAYS
- Start date
I know people say let your beauty shine but come on Tess, your grease mug is like safety reflector material. There are 6 safety reflectors or her skin.
ExxonMobil, come bring a drill, we got a BP spill and pores for days.
Red arrow is for start the count of chins we have. I've counted 5. The blue is the "cupids trebuchet as @Strine coined" and the yellow is just for wtf is this skin....
I cannot believe any beauty brand uses her as a promo for their stuff, especially skin. It's embarrassing.
I loved the end where she says you can't pay for this joy, actually I did pay for my session. Liar. I believe that as much as I believe she ever skipped a meal.
The Britney spears thing was interesting, all those quotes sound exactly like Tess.. was that the point?
ExxonMobil, come bring a drill, we got a BP spill and pores for days.
Red arrow is for start the count of chins we have. I've counted 5. The blue is the "cupids trebuchet as @Strine coined" and the yellow is just for wtf is this skin....
I cannot believe any beauty brand uses her as a promo for their stuff, especially skin. It's embarrassing.
I loved the end where she says you can't pay for this joy, actually I did pay for my session. Liar. I believe that as much as I believe she ever skipped a meal.
The Britney spears thing was interesting, all those quotes sound exactly like Tess.. was that the point?
Shes morphed from fat lana del Rey to fat Lindsey Lohan
Sad
(Also lol)
Sad
(Also lol)
Lol, Amina's still laboring under the delusion that Lisa Frank chased her out of Amina's old apartment (and it was not her sudden decision quit fulfilling orders and not pay any rent that had anything to do with it.
She might be good for a fat cow thread; she's gone by like 10 different instagram handles and has buried like three seemingly successful businesses because she gets "overwhelmed". I've long suspected that she barely breaks even and is propped up by the husband, and just doesn't enjoy doing actual work for other people.
She's not fat enough for the Deathfats forum, but she'd be a good fit for Beauty Parlour. It's clear she's already a cow; the trooning-out husband just enhances it.
LOL. Who knew Lisa Frank was a time traveler in addition to being a business woman? She OBVIOUSLY hopped on a DeLorean to 2021 to steal your ideas, then went back to the early 80s to pawn off the "unicorns barfing up glitter" aesthetic as her own!
Her skin looks like absolute shit
tessholliday
Starting off cancer ♋️ szn the only way I know how: surrounded by love, water, laughter, looking bratty & no effs given♋️♋️♋️♋️
Pffff she really shoved that other girl halfway behind her. Get your smaller arse back there Becky, TESS IS THE STAR AT ALL TIMES!
She tried to hide the thinner woman with better skin behind her crater-pocked, moon-sized body, and sadly it worked.
Someone needs to tell Tess that you can't get away with the whole sneering "bratty" thing when you're older than 22, maybe 27 if you're really cute and/or talented.
Dobbys Spare Sock
kiwifarms.net
I'd seen a photo posted in a 20 pic collage. Good to know jumping off the roof into the pool is encouraged rather than frowned upon
She looks like a troon version of the Green Giant. Poor giant. He is a nice man and didn't deserve this.
Don't know who this tattoo is of, but rest in pizza, that ruched sides of the bottoms looks as stretched as those gunt atretch marks. And good lord the cellulite... we getting to cellulitis and lymphedema yet?
Edit. Also the over lip lining is spedtastic crayons work and I would never allow myself to be tagged as her MUA if this is what "look" she puts out.
Don't know who this tattoo is of, but rest in pizza, that ruched sides of the bottoms looks as stretched as those gunt atretch marks. And good lord the cellulite... we getting to cellulitis and lymphedema yet?
Edit. Also the over lip lining is spedtastic crayons work and I would never allow myself to be tagged as her MUA if this is what "look" she puts out.
lamp shade
kiwifarms.net
- Highlight
- #18,732
As much as she tried to hide the other woman, this really puts into perspective how deformed Tess’s legs are from fat. Absolutely horrid. I can’t imagine having to lug those things around 24/7.
Lol does she think these pics will get her back into the modelling world? Is that what she's trying to do here?
I can only imagine her claw-ham trotters uploading the pics (accompanied by some bullshit astrology reason for emphasising her worst qualities) and thinking 'THIS is the one. I look so gd hot and adorbs how can the industry ignore me now!!'
It's Lady Gaga, but she looks like a fat drag queen on Tess's arm.
Edit: I really thought it was Lady Gaga this whole time, turns out it is a fat drag queen.
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gingerthief
kiwifarms.net
No, it's Divine, a fat drag queen.
I always thought it is Divine who was a fat drag queen. But with Tess' blown out of proportion arms you never know.
There are people with genuine skin illnesses who have better sketch than Tess.
- Highlight
- #18,737
Ah, that fallen arch! Those splayed toes! That... deathly dark hallux that looks bruised with its dark top, contrasted with that yellow undertone of the pad. Those toes that all look quite unhealthy.
Ah, the liquor. Staves off the feeling of disgust as I stare at this disaster.
Edited because as always, I can't spell to save my life.
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Am I the only one who saw this and instantly got 'hurr durr' going through my head?
"You don't have to settle", says the divorcee who can't get through a date before the guy runs off and never returns.
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