• "What have you got to lose now?"

Celebrity Tess HollidayLandwhale model, Body positive activist, and gigantic fraud

Discussion in 'Beauty Parlour' started by hood LOLCOW, Mar 3, 2016.

Forum Guidelines

The Beauty Parlour is for women or not-women in the sphere of cosplay and the beauty industry that is not strictly limited to lolcows.

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  1. Nothing hides legs that look like Edward James Olmos' face after a severe beating like filters, shadows, and wispy lingerie.
     
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    • Optimistic Optimistic x 1
    Patrick Buttman

    Patrick Buttman big Swiss hand rapist

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  2. "When you aren't sleeping because of a teething baby but somehow had time to do your hair and put on heels."
     
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    Particle Bored

    Particle Bored I am made out of toothpicks and glue

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  3. Sad how narcissism has dellusioned this perso to the point of neglecting a human being, also I hate how the internet nowadays takes the rule of "pic or didnt happen"
     
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  4. Baby don't give a shit how you looking . the sum of this baby's world right now is pain it doesn't understand and isn't equipped to cope with, and it's caretakers.
     
    • Agree Agree x 1
    Sadcake

    Sadcake Mah beetus

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  5. Pain it doesn't understand? Did I miss something and the baby has some sort of issue?
     
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    [Insert Meme Here] Bonjour--I mean, Buenos Diás!

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  6. Teething hurts like a mofo for a baby. That's why teething babies cry so much.
     
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    Sadcake

    Sadcake Mah beetus

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  7. Well duh, I'm a moron.
     
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    [Insert Meme Here] Bonjour--I mean, Buenos Diás!

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  8. She used a selfie she took at a party on NYE; she's an absolute shit mom and I wouldn't put it past her to do her makeup while rolling her eyes at her sobbing infant, but she was using a photo from a different night. Because the most soothing thing for your distressed infant is getting asspats on instagram.
     
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    multiverse

    multiverse in every parallel reality you're a cow
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  9. Tess' older son seems to have turned out normal, but Tess gave birth to him before she became a lolcow. This poor baby doesn't stand a chance given what we know about Tess' feeder/zookeeper, unless someone else takes this baby away from them.
     
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    CalmMyTits

    CalmMyTits Has tentacles in her panties!

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  10. Or, Nana Beth takes pity on the anchor baby and raises him, too. But I doubt it, Beth is fed up with Ryann at the moment.

    Ryann moved back to Mississippi to give birth to her first kid, and stayed there with her mom taking over childcare for around 2-3 years before moving back to Seattle. So Rylee's first few years were influenced mainly by his grandmother. Rylee and Beth are very close, and it's safe to say that Beth's influence on Rylee is what sets him apart from his family of cows. However: Beth isn't around right now, so Rylee is left by the wayside as his mom has a shiny new baby to show off.
     
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    multiverse

    multiverse in every parallel reality you're a cow
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  11. Since Tess keeps on getting bigger and bigger, we can only hope that she goes beyond the point where her body can create/sustain a fetus. Wouldn't it be fucking lulzy if she was literally too fat to fuck? I know chubby women can have a good time and be fun in bed, but someone of Tess' size, their options for sex are very limited, i mean she can't even get up off the floor unassisted, or pick up her leg/bend it.
     
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    CalmMyTits

    CalmMyTits Has tentacles in her panties!

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  12. Tess has admitted to needing the help of multiple people to dress herself. This is probably the only way she's having sex and also explains best why her mother is living with her :story:

    https://voat.co/v/fatpeoplehate/529028
     
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    entropyseekswork

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  13. When you need multiple people to assist you with sex, at that point, is it even worth it?
     
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    CalmMyTits

    CalmMyTits Has tentacles in her panties!

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  14. Tess is so on my 2017 death list.
     
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    Triggered Fivehead

    Triggered Fivehead Inner Lolcow

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  15. When you need multiple people to assist you with sex, at that point, is it even worth it?
     
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    CalmMyTits

    CalmMyTits Has tentacles in her panties!

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  16. IMG_2488.JPG
     
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    FatFuckingClown

    FatFuckingClown *pins you to the ground and force-feeds you crack*
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  17. - Right side of waist does not match left
    - Thumb missing from right side; photoshop error
    - HOLY FUCKING SHIT HER SHADOW. They forgot to shoop her shadow, and it's glorious
    Screen Shot 2017-01-19 at 12.28.08 PM.png

    We see the YAS QWEENs have been replaced by WERK BETCHes. And that Ryann is fishing for new jobs by adding her management tag. Her year long contract with Pennington's will expire in a couple months and she's had no other work since the end of 2015.
     
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    multiverse

    multiverse in every parallel reality you're a cow
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  18. "distressed jeans"

    And understatement if there ever was one.
     
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    Particle Bored

    Particle Bored I am made out of toothpicks and glue

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  19. Holy fuck I can bench press almost 140kg but my bicep is tiny when compared to hers.

    Another extremely shopped photo that proves that she really loves and accepts her body... oh wait.

    This fucking cow looks literally disfigured (the lumps of fat on her thighs look like tumours) unless extremely edited.

    I hate the approach of trying to pretend "I know I'm sexy" instead of admitting that she's a fucking failure and extremely wasted potential and should work on herself.

    If she dies within 10 years trolling the HAES fucktards on social media will be glorious.

    Every time I think she'd be fuckable if she lost like 60% of that fat I just remember this picture http://i.imgur.com/zzMIprH.jpg and any doubt that she's absolutely disgusting under the clothes is gone.
     
    • Agree Agree x 2
    #379 Buzzkill, Jan 19, 2017
    Last edited: Jan 19, 2017
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  20. I don't mean to go against you, but I don't think it's as edited as you're thinking. Her thumb on her right (our left) is stuffed inside the pocket and the thumb on her left (our right) is behind her fat. As for the shadow, it looks like it's just unflattering lighting.

    I do agree, however, that her waistline has probably been edited in some way, or she's using some industrial strength shapewear. Probably a combination of both.
     
    • Agree Agree x 6
    Calling

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