The Cole Smithey Thread -

DCM90

Voltor for Glick
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Something I've always wondered is where did Cole go when he moved out at 17? He wouldn't be able to go to University of San Diego until the next year, the Rocking Dogs weren't yet formed so he couldn't stay with them and it couldn't have been anyone locally because I have a feeling Chris would've let slip about Cole staying with someone locally. Did he just drive out to California in his car and stay in Section 8 housing or did he know someone already there and stay with them? Or did he spend his time as a barely legal sexy buddy for some old Hollywood socialite?
he was a street punk rocker kid.
 
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praktica

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Something I've always wondered is where did Cole go when he moved out at 17? He wouldn't be able to go to University of San Diego until the next year, the Rocking Dogs weren't yet formed so he couldn't stay with them and it couldn't have been anyone locally because I have a feeling Chris would've let slip about Cole staying with someone locally. Did he just drive out to California in his car and stay in Section 8 housing or did he know someone already there and stay with them? Or did he spend his time as a barely legal sexy buddy for some old Hollywood socialite?
Like the Weston men do when they hit skid row, he'd have worked his hustle.
738984

With the ladies only, of course.
 

ExceptionallyExceptional

GET OFF MY LAWN!
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Like the Weston men do when they hit skid row, he'd have worked his hustle.
View attachment 738984
With the ladies only, of course.
Holy shit, Chris actually looks like a normal dude there. He should have kept THAT up at least. He might be a sperg but this way he at least looks like someone who could find a girlfriend if he really tried. Granted he wouldn't be banging 10s, but he could probably fuck chicks like Lagoona Blue, which would probably be far more than he could have ever scored by being himself. They share some common interests and are both utter autists, so it could have worked. And with Chris' penchant for e-begging he could likely scrounge up enough to afford to get her a ticket over here to bang him. She might even have been able to keep him more grounded than he is now.

But no, instead he listened to assholes on the internet, ruined his sex drive with tiddy pills, never took care of himself physically or mentally and fell screaming into insanity where he once used to be gently drifting on the winds of tism.

It could have been yours, Chris. A somewhat normal life.... or as normal as you could ever have hoped for.
 

Slowinthemind

Riding the rickshaw of short buses
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Holy shit, Chris actually looks like a normal dude there. He should have kept THAT up at least. He might be a sperg but this way he at least looks like someone who could find a girlfriend if he really tried. Granted he wouldn't be banging 10s, but he could probably fuck chicks like Lagoona Blue, which would probably be far more than he could have ever scored by being himself. They share some common interests and are both utter autists, so it could have worked. And with Chris' penchant for e-begging he could likely scrounge up enough to afford to get her a ticket over here to bang him. She might even have been able to keep him more grounded than he is now.

But no, instead he listened to assholes on the internet, ruined his sex drive with tiddy pills, never took care of himself physically or mentally and fell screaming into insanity where he once used to be gently drifting on the winds of tism.

It could have been yours, Chris. A somewhat normal life.... or as normal as you could ever have hoped for.
A beating as a teenager would have sorted him out too.
 

crayolasword

kiwifarms.net

Attachments

Mesh Gear Fox

Play the guitar on the MTV
True & Honest Fan
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Cole Smithey said:
I'll never forget seeing the outline of the Rockin' Dogs demo in Lou's pocket. I'm sure he listened to it at least once.
Yeah, no buddy. I'm sure it went in the garbage can as soon as he got off stage. People do that shit all the time to folks in the entertainment industry (everybody's got a script or a demo), these guys are used to it. Reed just picked it up to be polite.
 

Apteryx Owenii

formerly a jerkop, wants to avoid merge
True & Honest Fan
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Holy shit, Chris actually looks like a normal dude there. He should have kept THAT up at least. He might be a sperg but this way he at least looks like someone who could find a girlfriend if he really tried... But no, instead he listened to assholes on the internet...
Assholes on the internet are the ones that got him to dress "like a normal dude" there. Left to his own devices, before the internet really discovered him and started messing with him, he looks like this:
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Since he's always being fucked with (and because he's got the tism), I can see why he was unable to determine that he should go with a particular brand of fuckery over the others. Cole is a pretentious ass but he was able to actually get himself a life.
 

Jack Awful

Laughs at Tards
kiwifarms.net
Oh well, at least Cole is married and seems to have a happy life with his wife and friends, Chris will never have that.
They each have what the other wants (kind of)

Cole has a loving wife that supports him financially so he can lie around all day creating content, which is what Chris wants.

Chris has enough internet fame for strangers to support his Patreon, even though he doesn't make any content, and has people literally willing to buy his garbage off eBay just so they can own something he touched, which is what Cole wants.

Yeah, Chris's internet fame is people laughing at him for being a tard, and even though Cole makes consistent content, it's mediocre and no one watches it, but I still found it interesting.