The General Thread -

Letthepowerofgoutcompelyo

She saw Ramona Flowers and felt so empowered
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Should probably find a way other than sperging here to keep my extreme anxiety in check.
I make crank calls to viewer feedback lines , mainly local news stations.

I used to terrorize "The Daily Buzz" that was syndicated from 2001-on.

Usually some kind of flatulent shut in.

It's important to sound as serious as you can during the fart sounds.

I think they like it.
 

SIGSEGV

Segmentation fault (core dumped)
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
I make crank calls to viewer feedback lines , mainly local news stations.

I used to terrorize "The Daily Buzz" that was syndicated from 2001-on.

Usually some kind of flatulent shut in.

It's important to sound as serious as you can during the fart sounds.

I think they like it.
BBBBBBBBBRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP

snnnnniiiiiiffffffffffff...oh yes my dear....sssnnnnnnnnnnnniiiiiiiiffffffff....quite pungent indeed...is that....dare I say....sssssssnniff...eggs I smell?......sniff sniff....hmmm...yes...quite so my darling....sniff....quite pungent eggs yes very much so .....ssssssssssssssnnnnnnnnnnnnnnniiiiiiiffffff....ah yes...and also....a hint of....sniff....cheese.....quite wet my dear....sniff...but oh yes...this will do nicely....sniff.....please my dear....another if you please....nice a big now....

BBBBBBRRRRRRRAAAAAAAPPPPPPPFFFFFFFFLLLLLLLLLPPPPPPPPPFFFFFF

Oh yes...very good!....very sloppy and wet my dear....hmmmmm...is that a drop of nugget I see on the rim?...hmmmm.....let me.....let me just have a little taste before the sniff my darling.......hmmmmm....hmm..yes....that is a delicate bit of chocolate my dear....ah yes....let me guess...curry for dinner?....oh quite right I am....aren't I?....ok....time for sniff.....sssssnnnnnnniiiiiiiiffffffff.....hmmm...hhhmmmmm I see...yes....yes indeed as well curry......hmmm....that fragrance is quite noticeable....yes.....onion and garlic chutney I take it my dear?.....hmmmmm....yes quite.....

BBBBBBRRRRRRRRPPPPPPFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFTTTTTTTTTTT

Oh I was not expecting that...that little gust my dear....you caught me off guard...yes...so gentle it was though...hmmmm...let me taste this little one...just one small sniff.....sniff...ah....ssssssnnnnnniiiiiffffffffffff...and yet...so strong...yes...the odor....sniff sniff...hmmm....is that....sniff....hmmm....I can almost taste it my dear.....yes....just...sniff....a little whiff more if you please.....ssssssnnnnnniiiiiffffffffff...ah yes I have it now....yes quite....hhhhmmmm...delectable my dear.....quite exquisite yes.....I dare say...sniff....the most pungent one yet my dear....ssssnnnnniiiifffffffffffffffffffffff....yes....
 

Dr. Ricearoni

This isn't even my most autistic form
kiwifarms.net
I'm sorry if this is the wrong place to ask this but would anyone happen to know a good thread to post this in? I was browsing knowyourmeme and holy shit I think we might need to make a thread on the website after this
723 (1).png

Like holy shit this is incredibly autistic but I can't find a good thread to put it in and I'm worried I don't have enough info here to start my own.
Link to the GoFundMe, seems his real name is Joshua Harris and he's from Augusta, GA, but I'm no internet sleuth so I can't find much info beyond that.
Archive of link

Edit: I'm stupid and posted a link to the image instead of uploading a thumbnail of it
 

Letthepowerofgoutcompelyo

She saw Ramona Flowers and felt so empowered
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
I'm sorry if this is the wrong place to ask this but would anyone happen to know a good thread to post this in? I was browsing knowyourmeme and holy shit I think we might need to make a thread on the website after this


Like holy shit this is incredibly autistic but I can't find a good thread to put it in and I'm worried I don't have enough info here to start my own.
Link to the GoFundMe, seems his real name is Joshua Harris and he's from Augusta, GA, but I'm no internet sleuth so I can't find much info beyond that.
Archive of link
There's the proving grounds for stuff like this, I've learned from it researching potential lolcows whether they are worthy or not of threads or even posting about them in a more general topic.

I've visited that Army base there, that city has something in the water that boosts confidence 1000 percent and decreases intelligence to 65.

I can bet good money he or somebody he knows has a pair of "truck nuts" on his vehicle and hears 3 out of 5 Austin Rhodes shows.

Publix has good subs though.

90 percent of my potential lolcows sputter out because true lolcows are magical and giveth milk aplenty.
 
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Dr. Ricearoni

This isn't even my most autistic form
kiwifarms.net
There's the proving grounds for stuff like this, I've learned from it researching potential lolcows whether they are worthy or not of threads or even posting about them in a more general topic.

I've visited that Army base there, that city has something in the water that boosts confidence 1000 percent and decreases intelligence to 65.

I can bet good money he or somebody he knows has a pair of "truck nuts" on his vehicle and hears 3 out of 5 Austin Rhodes shows.

Publix has good subs though.

90 percent of my potential lolcows sputter out because true lolcows are magical and giveth milk aplenty.
Thank you, I'll gather what info I can and see if it goes anywhere.
 

Letthepowerofgoutcompelyo

She saw Ramona Flowers and felt so empowered
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Thank you, I'll gather what info I can and see if it goes anywhere.
I havent seen the area in over 15 years but if you learn what side of town they're on that really informs what kind of scammy rednecks they are.
Peach orchard area is kinda super trailer trash, near downtown is uppity but poorer crackers who want to rub elbows with dem colored folk, Washington Road area is people who think they're fancy, or old money types.
 

LightDragonman1

kiwifarms.net
I don't really know were else to put this, so here goes.

Honestly, I feel as though I'd be the kind of person who you guys would call a lolcow. I mean, I'm gonna be in my late twenties soon, and yet I'm still living with my parents, only managed to get a standard Art Associates degree despite taking double the amount of time to earn it while many of you guys have earned something much better, still don't know how to drive, and am only working a standard job as a lot associate.

It just really makes me feel like I wasted my life, and that I have very little to look forward to. At the best, all I can see happening is that I at least give you guys one more person to mock and make fun of, especially if I ever try my hand at streaming.

Am I just being overly down on myself?
 

Buster O'Keefe

Enjoys offal
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
I don't really know were else to put this, so here goes.

Honestly, I feel as though I'd be the kind of person who you guys would call a lolcow. I mean, I'm gonna be in my late twenties soon, and yet I'm still living with my parents, only managed to get a standard Art Associates degree despite taking double the amount of time to earn it while many of you guys have earned something much better, still don't know how to drive, and am only working a standard job as a lot associate.

It just really makes me feel like I wasted my life, and that I have very little to look forward to. At the best, all I can see happening is that I at least give you guys one more person to mock and make fun of, especially if I ever try my hand at streaming.

Am I just being overly down on myself?
You should probably kys.
(In Minecraft)
 

Dyn

woman respecter
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
I don't really know were else to put this
Anywhere else. Literally anywhere fucking else.

The Kiwi Farms is not an appropriate venue to openly solicit emotional support or therapy. Nobody here is obligated by social expectations to pretend to care about your mental health or perform any amount of emotional labour on your behalf, and the absolute best-case scenario for you here is to have your cries for help be completely ignored. If you have the means to access a professional therapist, go make an appointment. If you have an outside support network of friends and family, go to them. If you've made personal connections here who might actually care if you live or die, contact them privately.

This is the only warning anybody's ever going to bother to give you. Don't ever do this again.
 

Letthepowerofgoutcompelyo

She saw Ramona Flowers and felt so empowered
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
I don't really know were else to put this, so here goes.

Honestly, I feel as though I'd be the kind of person who you guys would call a lolcow. I mean, I'm gonna be in my late twenties soon, and yet I'm still living with my parents, only managed to get a standard Art Associates degree despite taking double the amount of time to earn it while many of you guys have earned something much better, still don't know how to drive, and am only working a standard job as a lot associate.

It just really makes me feel like I wasted my life, and that I have very little to look forward to. At the best, all I can see happening is that I at least give you guys one more person to mock and make fun of, especially if I ever try my hand at streaming.

Am I just being overly down on myself?
Everything is fucked up right now. Keeping yourself alive until after the Covid-1984 and commie bullshit is defeated should be goal enough for now.

My parents are long dead and I could have more money coming in, but I'm still here. Just focus on getting to 2021.

I miss neet days now and then but my late mother was already a hypochondriac and covid would make me scream at her bullshit all day, its good she isn't around for this.
 

ToroidalBoat

Token Hispanic Friend
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
The late 2010s and 2020 - especially 2020 - have been a huge blow to my optimism. I hope I can still avoid excess pessimism though.
 
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Letthepowerofgoutcompelyo

She saw Ramona Flowers and felt so empowered
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
The late 2010s and 2020 - especially 2020 - have been a huge blow to my optimism. I hope I can still avoid excess pessimism though.
You can have fun even in bad times. Enjoy simple things.

It's hot and I'm listening to the soundtrack to Onrush, right next to the window unit and having cold beverages.
Everything is ok right now.
 

thegooddoctor

kiwifarms.net
I don't really know were else to put this, so here goes.

Honestly, I feel as though I'd be the kind of person who you guys would call a lolcow. I mean, I'm gonna be in my late twenties soon, and yet I'm still living with my parents, only managed to get a standard Art Associates degree despite taking double the amount of time to earn it while many of you guys have earned something much better, still don't know how to drive, and am only working a standard job as a lot associate.

It just really makes me feel like I wasted my life, and that I have very little to look forward to. At the best, all I can see happening is that I at least give you guys one more person to mock and make fun of, especially if I ever try my hand at streaming.

Am I just being overly down on myself?
Look If your serious about how you feel than I’m sorry man, but seriously why did you ever think it would be wise to post about your mental issues In a place like this???! 😑Cmon don’t be a 🤡 with someone who been on the farms long enough, considering your reaction score, don’t you think you’d have gotten it through your head this isn’t the kind of place to powerful your personal issues?? 😫 Jesus I don’t know why some users still don’t get fucking get It?! Do not come to the farms to get legitimate help, I’ll admit their are of course some genuinely kind people here but overall you’d best posting on a mental health website, or I dunno call a damn 👨‍⚕️ Seriously stop using the farms as a hugbox people(:_(😡🚫
 

The Spice boi

I live for customer service
kiwifarms.net
So I've got a pretty freaky experience I want to share with the board. I wouldn't say it's paranormal or anything, more a reminder that the world is crazy and people do crazy shit all the time.

Thing is, I don't know where to share it. I didn't find any personal scary story threads using the search function. Would here be a good place to share it?

Edit: This happened last night, so the details are still pretty solid in my mind
 
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