The "Is Kat Pregnant" speculation thread - MichaelScottShoutingNo.GIF

[Iron Hamster]

The most he would do is have facetime chats with the jarbologist on how to raise another man's child.

 

[millais]

Besides the most plausible "open window" theory, the only other thing I can think of is that maybe Khat took up a babysitting gig to bring in some small additional income. She's only working a handful of hours each week, and there has been some debate over whether that is an entirely voluntary state of affairs on her part or whether they really do need the extra money, but she's just such a poor employee that none of her supervisors are willing to give her extra hours.

 

[GigaOPC]

Khet probs just had a friend over, maybe even the same person who checked in on jasper during the CT pilgrimage. If her friends are about her age they've prob plopped out a couple brood at this point. Phil just doesn't want to tell the truth because he doesn't want people asking why he wasn't with them. Just like when Pandalee had people over a couple times and DSP stayed upstairs avoiding them and the chat was asking him to bring them on stream or quit playing and go be with his guests.

 

[Cyber Bowling]

Besides the most plausible "open window" theory, the only other thing I can think of is that maybe Khat took up a babysitting gig to bring in some small additional income. She's only working a handful of hours each week, and there has been some debate over whether that is an entirely voluntary state of affairs on her part or whether they really do need the extra money, but she's just such a poor employee that none of her supervisors are willing to give her extra hours.

Jumping off of this, if Khet had actually been pregnant, I don't think she'd still be working. Granted, she barely works as it is, but we know she at least works on the weekends, including when Phil streams. While I don't think either one of them would be even remotely close to good parents, I don't think they'd leave their child unsupervised. And if they have been doing that this whole time, I feel like we would have heard the kid before this. If they went the nanny/babysitter route, which I could see them being lazy enough to do, I think it would have come up in the bankruptcy filing, with Phil arguing it was an essential cost for him, since both he and Khet need to work.

 

[DarkSoulsPhil]

Phil would have included the kid in either taxes or bankruptcy forms.

A visiting kid or passing by? More likely

Yes his body language is very defensive and looks like he's a liar. But he does that whenever he doesnt get a meme. Takes him a few weeks to understand deteactor memes

 

[LostMy1stAccount]

Yes his body language is very defensive and looks like he's a liar

This is the norm for him by now. He is a pathological liar at this point and can't even tell the truth regarding the most innocent things in his life.

 

[Nigel of Ukip]

My theory is that it was Jasper.

He just finished work, and was driving home. No traffic or anything, he was home quickly. But due to the Corona panic he forgot the gate remote so he had to leave the car and punch in the gate code, 2662. But before he could walk back to his car he got jumped by those thug deadly trained assassin squirrels and they beat him up. Nothing he could do, he has no claws. So he got home and was panic angry sobbing due to his defeat.
Phil reacted the way he did because he knows it would hurt Jaspers feelings if we heard him sob.

Just keep it simple guys.

 

[strandedcastaway]

1) Phil begs for money for everything, and children actually cost money to raise---and even before they are born. Considering he's bankrupt, if Khet got pregnant he'd have begged night and day for months and gotten a ton of donations.
2) So a baby (?) cried for five seconds in a video...where is it the rest of the time? Wouldn't we hear a baby crying every so often before this? They do that a lot.
3) Phil's in bankruptcy but lied about having a baby on his tax forms just to avoid...what exactly? That's a tax deduction.
4) If you told me that sound was Jasper crying outside the door, I'd believe it. We have cats and they whine and "cry" to get into rooms when doors are closed. Phil keeps the door closed when he's streaming. Not a very complicated theory and 99% the likely answer.
5) Why would you lie about having a baby? We know Phil lies about everything but what would be the benefit? As I wrote, he couldn't use it for sympathy, yet it would change his schedule (which never changes), a baby actually disrupts your life, it makes a lot of noise...it's not a kitten. Also, if you suddenly reveal you had a cat, you're a weird guy. If you reveal you were pretending not to have A CHILD IN YOUR HOME, you're a psycho. For someone so worried about his image, why do that?

 

[tzgnilki]

the thing that makes me the most suspicious was he claimed to have seen/heard the clip and still claimed it was the sound from the fridge

could've said it was a thousand other things, neighbour, khet playing the sims, someone else's mic, cat, chupacabra

nope, it was the fridge

 

[Kosher Dill]

The real answer is that Kat was possessed by a baby demon at the time.

 

[Sparkletor 2.0]

Phil claimed $9000 in business expenses in July of 2019.

Horse breeding can cost thousands and thousands of dollars.

Just throwing that out there.

 

[architect]

I'm not entirely up on this baby lore, but wasn't he saying it was a refrigerator sound effect a few days ago? (Not that I think he's actually hiding a baby)

 

[tzgnilki]

I'm not entirely up on this baby lore, but wasn't he saying it was a refrigerator sound effect a few days ago?

the refrigerator has suddenly become a baby

his pigsplanation about it being the refrigerator

 

[tzgnilki]

after claiming the baby was a refrigerator

the baby is now real but it's the neighbours

 

[Comma]

I'm not entirely up on this baby lore, but wasn't he saying it was a refrigerator sound effect a few days ago?

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It's just DSP failing at acting like he isn't bothered by something. People are memeing on him with the baby stuff, so he can't restrain himself from "casually" pointing out things that could've caused the baby-like sounds. Just like how he "casually" points out there's only 20 minutes left on the stream, totally not trying to hook a last-minute whale or something.

 

[actually]

after claiming the baby was a refrigerator

the baby is now real but it's the neighbours

Believable, tbh. He'd shill that baby so hard.

It's just DSP failing at acting like he isn't bothered by something. People are memeing on him with the baby stuff, so he can't restrain himself from "casually" pointing out things that could've caused the baby-like sounds. Just like how he "casually" points out there's only 20 minutes left on the stream, totally not trying to hook a last-minute whale or something.

I think he's torn between not wanting a child and seeing a kid as being another "real adult" milestone. Probably why he does that really stupid "Jasper is my son" nonsense sometimes.

 

[Cistern Rumbler]

I sincerely hope he never breeds.

 

[Sir Wesley Tailpipe]

Believable, tbh. He'd shill that baby so hard.

He’d be shilling Prince of Hate onesies from his Teespring like a motherfucker.

 

[ditto]

he didn't list the cat, but he did include cat food.

When called out for it I hope he clarifies it's a typo and should be kat food. Potatoes for his wife.

 

[Potato]

I'm not entirely up on this baby lore, but wasn't he saying it was a refrigerator sound effect a few days ago? (Not that I think he's actually hiding a baby)

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The blackest eyes