The "Is Kat Pregnant" speculation thread - MichaelScottShoutingNo.GIF

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Quantum Diabetes

You got the touch..you got the powahhh…yeah!
True & Honest Fan
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It would be an unholy half-horse, half-potato abomination!
Computer generated baby photo here
pixomatic_11282020124045413.png
 

Autism Spectroscopy

There are definite peaks in your autism spectrum
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Seeing new posts for this thread reminds me of the time a mysterious noise could be heard on the stream and people were arguing over whether or not it was the cries of a baby.

Those were good times. lol
Thank fucking god for that, Phil can't take proper care about anything materialistic, let go a child.

So, we need to talk. I need tips for diapers, honest to god. Phil Jr. shits like 12 times a day! I definitely don't wear them, I know there is a meme and those insane fuckers say that I do *shows Zelda pajama pants with obvious diaper lines* so, you are banned if you mention it again.
 

Sparkletor 2.0

Shhhh
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Phil is almost 40. Spends every day playing video games in his pajama pants and video game tshirts. Idea of fun is going to the pet shop at the mall or eating fast food. Constant ear infections. Can't cook, clean, and only bathes twice a week. Constantly throws tantrums. Went bankrupt because he put everything on a dozen different credit cards. Spent a fortune on comic book statues. Avoids responsibility at every turn.

Kat doesn't want a kid because she already has to take care of a man who acts like an 8 year old. Phil doesn't want a kid because he wants to be an 8 year old kid permanently.
 

TheGoutburglar

The only good pigroach is a salty one.
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Kat doesn't want a kid because she already has to take care of a man who acts like an 8 year old.

Although it's debatable how much she actually takes care of Phil. She doesn't seem to cook much, if at all, and obviously NO ONE cleans his "office", let alone her. There is only so dirty the rest of the condo can get given that neither of them do anything, most I can think of is tending to Jasper and keeping her own room tidy (or not, if she's a slob like him).

And honestly, I would take a ton of chores over having to listen to him. Especially when he feels like bitching about something, which is probably every day. Wouldn't be too hard, just take care of whatever needs doing inside while he's passed out and then go outside to do yard work after he wakes up. He wouldn't follow, he hates outside.
 

TheGoutburglar

The only good pigroach is a salty one.
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Remember when her hobbies were supposedly cooking and cleaning? The housewife full-court press didn't last long at all.

Who the fuck has hobbies like that? Apparently not even the woman that Phil chose to be his replacement mother.

And I would think that of him even if I knew nothing else about Phil, because holy shit is that a red flag. Some girl tells me that those are her hobbies, I'm out. Whether she's baiting me with bullshit, or is serious and therefore way too weird for me, no thanks.
 

Schmeckel

If you miss it, you must be blind!
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Aren’t you one of the most active users here, voluntarily hanging off every word DSP has to say?
We're all a bunch of brainless, window licking nudniks, here. Doesn't matter the level of activity. If you say one less than pleasant thing about Dave, you're clearly a 'tractor and deserve to be pitched to the sun.
 

TheGoutburglar

The only good pigroach is a salty one.
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I meant that if I was Khet, I would rather be busy than not busy, since actually living with the pigroach is vastly different from hanging out on a forum dedicated to laughing at him.

For example, I don't hear him snorting all damn day. Khet does, if she doesn't have a distraction.
 

Cyber Bowling

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I meant that if I was Khet, I would rather be busy than not busy, since actually living with the pigroach is vastly different from hanging out on a forum dedicated to laughing at him.

For example, I don't hear him snorting all damn day. Khet does, if she doesn't have a distraction.
I think Phil's streaming life is her distraction. We know where Phil is most of the day, and Khet clearly isn't there with him. With the small hints we've gotten at their life, she isn't really hanging out with him after his streams. I'd wager that his wheelchairs/detractor communities spend more time with Phil each week then she does.
 

TheGoutburglar

The only good pigroach is a salty one.
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If that's the case, and Phil doesn't care, that sure says a lot about how pointless it was for him to get married.

I mean, we know it's for appearances, but Phil seriously could have pulled off looking like mature adult in front of his retards without having someone living there who isn't even going to be the maid he wants her to be.
 

Ptolemy

Companion
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If that's the case, and Phil doesn't care, that sure says a lot about how pointless it was for him to get married.

I mean, we know it's for appearances, but Phil seriously could have pulled off looking like mature adult in front of his retards without having someone living there who isn't even going to be the maid he wants her to be.
Getting married is about the idea of locking up the food preparer and the house cleaner. He figured that out when Panda left.

I know to a normal person marriage doesn't mean binding people together for eternity anymore, but I do think Dave believes getting married will help keep her around long term, just like how calling her his soulmate tries to achieve the same goal.

Khet no longer makes appearances not because she wasn't profitable, but because they made her leave. I doubt it is her decision alone to not want to be on stream, I truly think Dave was shook when he saw that she left the house and will do anything in his power to make sure a maid never leaves because of viewers again.

In truth, he had a lot in common with Panda, it didn't work out with his lifestyle though (among other factors) and I would wager he thinks he is doing everything right, everything correct, by marrying Khet. And if she leaves him he really "did nothing wrong"

:stress:
 

Cyber Bowling

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Sometimes I think Phil married Kat to spite Leanna. Or maybe somehow make her jealous? In his mind, who wouldn’t want to marry him, the Italian stallion, 4th place at evo??!
This is probably part of it. Given his tweets on his wedding night, spiting us was certainly part of it as well. I think LARPing as an adult is another aspect of it, since he can pretend like he accomplished something by getting married. And we all know Phil loves getting accomplishments.

I don't think it is a stretch to say that Phil has a pretty limited view on relationships, both because of how selfish he is, and just a general lack of experience. It seems like Leanna was his first real relationship, and even calling that a relationship, at least in the later years, is being overly generous. Phil barely spent any time with her and treated her pretty poorly. We know he rushed things with Kat, so it's not like he had time to grow up and learn what an actual relationship was supposed to be. And unlike with Leanna, he didn't even have that early phase where they at least seemed to occasionally go out and hang around other people.

Hermit Phil struggles with empathy. When someone dies, he talks about how hard it is on him, or compares it to the ultimate loss and struggle of losing a save file. When something bad happens in the world, he either ignores it or mocks it, until it affects him personally, like his Coronavirus response. Or really, anything vaguely political. I can't imagine a world where someone like that understands what it means to have any kind of connection, let alone a deep one, with someone else, especially someone he barely knows/hasn't taken the time to know.

Because of that, I really don't know what his actual mindset was for marrying Kat, and because it is impossible to get Phil to discuss anything real or meaningful in an honest way, I don't think we'll ever know. Maybe when they eventually break up we'll get a rant where he inadvertently reveals what he was thinking pushing for marriage with her or what he was expecting to get out of it.
 

strandedcastaway

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The wedding itself shows how little Phil cares about anyone but himself, even his "soulmate". He spent about 12 cents of his own money on that wedding (since his parents flew them out there), yet was racking up massive debt elsewhere. If Khet knew Phil was making well over $100,000 a year and (at the time) had at least 10 credit cards, wouldn't she question why they had a tiny ceremony at his parents' house? And why there was no honeymoon?

The largest red flag is the lack of honeymoon. Say what you want spending wisely (though DSP never cared about that any OTHER time), but how could they never go ANYWHERE on a honeymoon? Khet lived this horrible childhood...couldn't he pay for one vacation before she settles into a life as a maid? Phil spent to the point of eventual bankruptcy---you'd think a tiny fraction of that could be on the woman he allegedly loves. But his priority is his gin and mobile games. That shows Khet is merely a bystander living rent free and occasionally making dinner.
 

TheGoutburglar

The only good pigroach is a salty one.
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There is no limit to Phil's selfishness. The same guy who lured Khet in with talk of struggling with alcoholism is the same guy who feels absolutely nothing for Khet's past troubles.

This kind of shit really explains a lot about the DSP you see on camera dismissing suggestions for how to improve the stream for the viewers. Literally everything he does is for his benefit. Even when it looks like he might care about someone else, he WILL inevitably demonstrate that it's an accident at best and a ruse at worst. FFS, you can't even motivate him with the possibility of getting more viewers/money because if it requires any kind of sacrifice on his part, his self-centered brain throws a fucking fit.

It really isn't the kids toys that make him a man-baby, it's the way he hates anything being not about him.
 

RoyalBlast

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There is no limit to Phil's selfishness. The same guy who lured Khet in with talk of struggling with alcoholism is the same guy who feels absolutely nothing for Khet's past troubles.

This kind of shit really explains a lot about the DSP you see on camera dismissing suggestions for how to improve the stream for the viewers. Literally everything he does is for his benefit. Even when it looks like he might care about someone else, he WILL inevitably demonstrate that it's an accident at best and a ruse at worst. FFS, you can't even motivate him with the possibility of getting more viewers/money because if it requires any kind of sacrifice on his part, his self-centered brain throws a fucking fit.

It really isn't the kids toys that make him a man-baby, it's the way he hates anything being not about him.
He also enjoy insulting others for no reason and having power over anyone or anything.