The Julays Seventh Annual Lolcow Awards 2021 - Results are out! - SIX Lolcow of the Year awards. All your favorite cows. Winners have been announced and vote totals posted!

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Hamplanet Fitness

Thanks for the TRIGGERS you SHITS
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Joined
Jan 26, 2018
Featured on Dec 31, 2021 at 4:43 PM: Community managed "Lolcow of the Year" thread.
:julay:

(First Year / Second Year / Third Year / Fourth Year / Fifth Year / Sixth Year)

The Julays are an annual award ceremony for lolcows. The various awards are divided up by subforum or thread tag. Nominees were added based on front-page features and user submissions.

Lolcow of the Year

First, a special commemoration for a cherished lolcow who has been banished to the prison realm. Christian "Christine Jesus Sonichu" Weston Chandler has brought us laughs for years and is now behind bars for repeatedly fucking his geriatric mother. Because Chris' arrest was by far the most momentous event of the year (and one of the most significant in lolcow history), Chris is the Lolcow of the Year for 2021.

goldensonichu.png

Chris will receive the Golden Sonichu (as seen on eBay) to commemorate his continued service to our amusement.

The six other Lolcows of the Year

Unlike past years, where the various winners of the other awards duke it out in a final round to become Lolcow of the Year, the traditional second round has been scrapped because the Lolcow of the Year title has already been awarded.

Instead, there are SIX lesser Lolcow of the Year awards, divided by lolcow prominence and thread activity. This makes it so newer cows and cows from less popular subforums who would normally get crushed in the final round instead face off against others of similar stature. Some cows are big names on other sites, yet have relatively little thread activity - I guesstimated where those cows should be ranked based on a combination of both factors.

We're going back to the old Lolcow of the Year system next year; I'm only doing it this way for 2021 because of Chris.

Remember, when voting, only vote based on the events of 2021!

Message me your votes or post them in this thread. There is a voting template at the bottom for easy formatting.

Best S-Tier Lolcow

S-tier cows have subforums or extremely active threads, averaging over 2 pages of content per day. They also have long histories, numerous features and/or major sagas this year.



Best A-Tier Lolcow

A-tier cows have active threads, with over 200 pages this year. They also have long histories, multiple features and/or major sagas this year.


Best B-Tier lolcow

B-tier cows have fairly active threads, with over 100 pages this year. They also have multiple features and/or major sagas this year.



Best C-Tier Lolcow:

C-tier cows have modest threads, with over 25 pages this year. They've earned themselves a feature or had a major saga this year.



Best D-Tier Lolcow:

D-tier cows haven't had much thread activity but did something noteworthy.



Best F-Tier Lolcow:

This is an award for promising cows whose threads made it out of the Prospering Grounds but died within 5 pages.



Other Awards

Main Forum

Lolcow Salon
Other Forums
The following categories are also being awarded.
  • Best Lolcow-Related Pic: The most entertaining picture a lolcow posted in 2021.
  • Best Lolcow-Related Video: The most entertaining lolcow-related video made in 2021.
  • Best Lolcow Fanwork: The best fanwork for lolcows made in 2021.
  • Best Lolcow Meltdown: The best recorded meltdown a lolcow had in 2021.
  • Best Kevin Gibes Inflated Universe Lolcow: The best lolcow who has a thread or is a prominent recurring cast member of the Kevin Gibes Inflated Universe.
  • Fresh Meat: The best new lolcow of 2021.
  • Best Put to Pasture Lolcow of 2021: Some lolcows didn't survive the year, but only one of our dearly departed will take home this award.

Best Dramacow:



Best Artcow:



Best Careercow:



Best Mad Cow:



Best Horrorcow:



Queen of the Beauty Parlour:



Breaker of Scales:



Best Lolcow Community:



Best Internet Famous Lolcow:



Best Furfag:



Best Rat King Lolcow:



Best Kevin Gibes Inflated Universe Lolcow:



Fresh Meat:

This award is also being honorarily given to nominee Dr. Kathy Rumer / "The Butcher of Ardmore" because it's just too fitting. She had 20 votes.


Best Put to Pasture Lolcow:



Best Lolcow Picture:

"Toe Fungus" (Isabella Loretta Janke) - Winner (67 votes)


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"I am the new Rosa Parks" (Nick Fuentes) (32 votes)

the_new_rosa_parks.png

"SuperStraight Selfie" (Stephanie Cianfriglia / Sapphire Crimson Claw) (20 votes)

superstraight.png

"Burger Den" (Josh Saunders / KingCobraJFS) (41 votes)

burgerden.jpg

"Sports Illustrated Material" (Anna O'Brien / GlitterAndLazers) (28 votes)

aob.png

"MEAT" (Richard "Lowtax" Kyanka) (3 votes)

lowtax.jpg

Best Lolcow Video:

"A Legend Falls" (Ethan Ralph + Christian Weston Chandler) - Winner (77 votes)




"Coked-Out Workout" (Chantal Sarault / Foodie Beauty) (2 votes)


"Buck Breaking" (Marcus Sanders / Tariq Nasheed) (65 votes)

(clip)


"Shart" (Ethan Ralph / #Killstream) (39 votes)



"Yo Yovanna!" (Russell Greer) (11 votes)



"Intersex Pride (feat. My Vagina)" (Stephanie Cianfriglia / Sapphire Crimson Claw) (4 votes)


"JFS had a great fall" (Josh Saunders / KingCobraJFS) (21 votes)



"January 6 Livestream" (Anthime Joseph Gionet / Baked Alaska) (5 votes)


Best Lolcow Fanwork:

This award is being given to all the artists who contributed to the main background image. Y'all did a great job!

Best Recorded Lolcow Meltdown:

Blake Howard Hobbs, "Don't Call Me Sir" - Winner (82 votes)




Christian Weston Chandler, "Direct Message to Hasbro" (63 votes)



Patrick Sean Tomlinson, "Privacy Complaints" (21 votes)

(Audio)

Mary Margaret Barone, "HURT HURT HURT HURT HURT" (8 votes)



Holland Proudfoot, "Alice's Meltdown" (17 votes)


Thank you all for voting! The Julays will return next year!
 
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Dick Pooman

Muchacho Sauce
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Joined
May 20, 2018
  • Best S-Tier Lolcow: Ethan Ralph
  • Best A-Tier Lolcow: KingCobraJFS
  • Best B-Tier Lolcow: Ethan Klein
  • Best C-Tier Lolcow: Patrick Sean Tomlinson
  • Best D-Tier Lolcow: Mike Lindell
  • Best Dramacow: Patrick Sean Tomlinson
  • Best Artcow: Shadman
  • Best Careercow: Tariq Nasheed
  • Best Skitzocow: Amos Yee
  • Best Horrorcow: Kevin Gibes
  • Queen of the Beauty Parlour: Anisa Jomha
  • Breaker of Scales: Chantal
  • Best Lolcow Community: The Tranch
  • Best Internet Famous Lolcow: Nick Fuentes
  • Best Furfag: Graeme Kelly
  • Best Rat King Lolcow: ADF
  • Best Kevin Gibes Inflated Universe Lolcow: Phillip Logue
  • Fresh Meat: Jack Murphy
  • Best Put to Pasture Lolcow: Lowtax
  • Best Lolcow-Related Pic: Burger Den
  • Best Lolcow-Related Video: "JFS had a great fall"
  • Best Lolcow Fanwork: @Genetic Mt. Dew / KingCobraJFS panel
  • Best Lolcow Meltdown: Blake Howard Hobbs
 

Fetish Roulette

Round and round and round it goes...
kiwifarms.net
Joined
May 19, 2021
All things considered, circumventing the normal voting rounds for lolcow of the year is probably warranted. That being said, I'd like to take a moment to advocate, on behalf of the thriving Kevin Gibes community, his consideration for the prestigious best S-tier lolcow award.

  • Best S-Tier Lolcow: Kevin Gibes
  • Best A-Tier Lolcow: Lou Gagliardi
  • Best B-Tier Lolcow: Byuu
  • Best C-Tier Lolcow: CallMeCarson
  • Best D-Tier Lolcow: Mike Lindell
  • Best F-Tier Lolcow: Caroline Georges
  • Best Dramacow: Ravioli Temper Stor
  • Best Artcow: Shadman
  • Best Careercow: Tariq Nasheed
  • Best Skitzocow: Kindness
  • Best Horrorcow: Kevin Gibes
  • Queen of the Beauty Parlour: shoe0nhead
  • Breaker of Scales: Chantal
  • Best Lolcow Community: The Tranch
  • Best Internet Famous Lolcow: Dream
  • Best Furfag: Lou Gagliardi
  • Best Rat King Lolcow: Sophie Labelle
  • Best Kevin Gibes Inflated Universe Lolcow: mode_view
  • Fresh Meat: Isabella Janke
  • Best Put to Pasture Lolcow: Lowtax
  • Best Lolcow-Related Pic: Nick Fuentes' "Rosa Parks"
  • Best Lolcow-Related Video: "Buck Breaking"
  • Best Lolcow Fanwork: Ralph in the Cornfield/ "Broke Dick Farms"
  • Best Lolcow Meltdown: Commiedickgurl's Ma'amtrum
 

ñññ

Me encanta ser blanco y estoy orgulloso de serlo.
kiwifarms.net
Joined
Jun 14, 2021
  • Best S-Tier Lolcow: Kevin Gibes
  • Best A-Tier Lolcow: Melinda Leigh Scott
  • Best B-Tier Lolcow: Byuu
  • Best C-Tier Lolcow: Blake Hobbs
  • Best D-Tier Lolcow: Kelly Karl Sleight
  • Best F-Tier Lolcow: Sara Michelle Murawski
  • Best Dramacow: Blake Howard Hobbs
  • Best Artcow: StoneToss
  • Best Careercow: Jim Sterling
  • Best Skitzocow: Amos Yee
  • Best Horrorcow: Isabella Loretta Janke
  • Queen of the Beauty Parlour: shoe0nhead
  • Breaker of Scales: Chantal Sarault
  • Best Lolcow Community: The Tranch
  • Best Internet Famous Lolcow: h3h3
  • Best Furfag: David A. Dieter
  • Best Rat King Lolcow: Kengel
  • Best Kevin Gibes Inflated Universe Lolcow: Kindness
  • Fresh Meat: ILJ
  • Best Put to Pasture Lolcow: Lowtax
  • Best Lolcow-Related Pic: Toe fungus
  • Best Lolcow-Related Video: Shart
  • Best Lolcow Meltdown: Blake Hobbs
 

thismanlies

Sacred Cows Make the Juiciest Hamburgers.
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Joined
Aug 13, 2016
  • Best S-Tier Lolcow: Ethan Ralph
  • Best A-Tier Lolcow: Lowtax
  • Best B-Tier Lolcow: Byuu
  • Best C-Tier Lolcow: Patrick Sean Thomlinson
  • Best D-Tier Lolcow: Mike Lindell
  • Best F-Tier Lolcow: Patrick Robitsch
  • Best Dramacow: Patrick Sean Thomlinson
  • Best Artcow: StoneToss
  • Best Careercow: Tariq Nasheed
  • Best Skitzocow: Amos Yee
  • Best Horrorcow: Isabella Loretta Janke
  • Queen of the Beauty Parlour: shoe0nhead
  • Breaker of Scales: Chantal Sarault
  • Best Lolcow Community: IP2
  • Best Internet Famous Lolcow: Baked Alaska
  • Best Furfag: David A. Dieter
  • Best Rat King Lolcow: Guillaume Labelle
  • Best Kevin Gibes Inflated Universe Lolcow: Kindness
  • Fresh Meat: Isabella Loretta Janke
  • Best Put to Pasture Lolcow: Brandon Ashur
  • Best Lolcow-Related Pic: Toe fungus
  • Best Lolcow-Related Video: A Legend Falls
  • Best Lolcow Meltdown: Patrick Sean Thomlinson
 

PhoBingas

There are communists outside of my house.
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Joined
Dec 24, 2019
  • Best S-Tier Lolcow: Ethan Ralph
  • Best A-Tier Lolcow: Baked Alaska
  • Best B-Tier Lolcow: Hasan Piker
  • Best C-Tier Lolcow: Jack Murphy
  • Best D-Tier Lolcow: The My Pillow Guy
  • Best F-Tier Lolcow: Queen of Canada
  • Best Dramacow: CommieDickGirl
  • Best Artcow: Assigned Gender
  • Best Careercow: Tariq Nasneed
  • Best Skitzocow: Amos Yee
  • Best Horrorcow: TransSalamander / Kevin Gibes
  • Queen of the Beauty Parlour: ShoeOnHead
  • Breaker of Scales: Foodie Beauty
  • Best Lolcow Community: The Tranch
  • Best Internet Famous Lolcow: Nick Fuentes
  • Best Furfag: Korps / @KorpsPropaganda
  • Best Rat King Lolcow: Kengel
  • Best Kevin Gibes Inflated Universe Lolcow: @RipleyStorm
  • Fresh Meat: Isabella Loretta Janke
  • Best Put to Pasture Lolcow: Lowtax
  • Best Lolcow-Related Pic: Burger den
  • Best Lolcow-Related Video: Ralph Shart
  • Best Lolcow Meltdown: Chris Chan's direct message to hasbro
This year has been a trip. I guess 2022 will (hopefully) see the conclusion of both the Ralph and Chris court shit. Both cow news and kino has been lacking the last couple months. God, maybe the speds are slowly learning.
 

Monolith

Guest
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Joined
Feb 13, 2018
  • Best S-Tier Lolcow: Kevin Gibes
  • Best A-Tier Lolcow: I don't follow any of them, no vote
  • Best B-Tier Lolcow: Shad
  • Best C-Tier Lolcow: Byuu
  • Best D-Tier Lolcow: No vote
  • Best F-Tier Lolcow: No vote
  • Best Dramacow: Rioley
  • Best Artcow: Assigned Male
  • Best Careercow: Tariq Nasneed
  • Best Skitzocow: Kindness
  • Best Horrorcow: Portabella
  • Queen of the Beauty Parlour: No vote
  • Breaker of Scales: Writing in I Am Jazz
  • Best Lolcow Community: The Tranch
  • Best Internet Famous Lolcow: No vote
  • Best Furfag: Korps / @KorpsPropaganda
  • Best Rat King Lolcow: Bardfinn
  • Best Kevin Gibes Inflated Universe Lolcow: @RipleyStorm
  • Fresh Meat: Tough call, but I'm saying Portabella
  • Best Put to Pasture Lolcow: No vote
  • Best Lolcow-Related Pic: Superstraight Selfie
  • Best Lolcow-Related Video: Buck Breaking
  • Best Lolcow Meltdown: Chris Chan's direct message to hasbro
 

Pee Cola

it's a real drink
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Joined
Jan 27, 2020
  • Best S-Tier Lolcow: Russell Greer
  • Best A-Tier Lolcow: Melinda Leigh Scott
  • Best B-Tier Lolcow: Byuu
  • Best C-Tier Lolcow: Jack Murphy
  • Best D-Tier Lolcow: Mike Lindell
  • Best F-Tier Lolcow: Doug Jackson
  • Best Dramacow: Blake Hobbs
  • Best Artcow: StoneToss
  • Best Careercow: Lowtax (RIP)
  • Best Skitzocow: Amos Yee
  • Best Horrorcow: Isabella Loretta Janke
  • Queen of the Beauty Parlour: shoe0nhead
  • Breaker of Scales: *
  • Best Lolcow Community: QAnon
  • Best Internet Famous Lolcow: ContraPoints
  • Best Furfag: Graeme Kelly
  • Best Rat King Lolcow: Kengle
  • Best Kevin Gibes Inflated Universe Lolcow: *
  • Fresh Meat: Jack Murphy
  • Best Put to Pasture Lolcow: Lowtax
  • Best Lolcow-Related Pic: Burger Den
  • Best Lolcow-Related Video: Shart
  • Best Lolcow Meltdown: Blake Hobbs
(*) I don't know enough about these categories to make an informed vote, hence no vote
 

Xarpho

plz no bully
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Joined
Jan 27, 2014
I don't have a vote for everyone but...

S-Tier: Ralph. His antics with Chris AND Pantsu AND the IP2 thot make him something special in all the wrong ways.
A-Tier: Boogie and playing with firearms.
Horrorcow: Gibes
Community: IP2
Internet Famous: Boogie again.
Best Lolcow-Related Video: Ralph's shart. Unironically, though, the video of CWC getting arresting. That was actually pretty cool. But for the voting, the shart.
Inactive: John Bulla. He's not an official candidate but he died this year.
 
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NynchLiggers

Lost Pillstream footage
kiwifarms.net
Joined
Nov 23, 2020
  • Best S-Tier Lolcow: Ethan Ralph
  • Best A-Tier Lolcow: Josh Saunders
  • Best B-Tier Lolcow: Hasan Piker
  • Best C-Tier Lolcow: Jack Murphy
  • Best D-Tier Lolcow: Michael Afghani
  • Best F-Tier Lolcow: SV SEETHER
  • Best Dramacow: Pat Tomlinson
  • Best Artcow: Shadman
  • Best Careercow: Tariq Nasneed
  • Best Skitzocow: Kindness
  • Best Horrorcow: Bella Jenkem
  • Best Lolcow Community: Tranch
  • Best Internet Famous Lolcow: Nick Fuentes
  • Best Furfag: Korps
  • Best Kevin Gibes Inflated Universe Lolcow: Kindness
  • Fresh Meat: Bella Jenkem
  • Best Put to Pasture Lolcow: LowT
  • Best Lolcow-Related Pic: Toe Fungus
  • Best Lolcow-Related Video: "A Legend Fails"
  • Best Lolcow Meltdown: "Don't call me sir"
A shame When Gunts Collide could not be nominated to Best Lolcow-Related Video.
 

S.C.U.D.

Full-Blown AIDS
kiwifarms.net
Joined
Feb 9, 2021
  • Best S-Tier Lolcow: Kevin Gibes
  • Best A-Tier Lolcow: Lowtax
  • Best B-Tier Lolcow: Byuu
  • Best C-Tier Lolcow: Patrick Sean Tomlinson
  • Best D-Tier Lolcow: Stone-man-warrior
  • Best F-Tier Lolcow: abstain (I don't follow any of those threads)
  • Best Dramacow: Patrick Sean Tomlinson
  • Best Artcow: Shadbase
  • Best Careercow: Moviebob
  • Best Skitzocow: Kindness
  • Best Horrorcow: Kevin Gibes
  • Queen of the Beauty Parlour: sh0e
  • Breaker of Scales: Chantal
  • Best Lolcow Community: Tenacious Unicorn Ranch
  • Best Internet Famous Lolcow: Dream
  • Best Furfag: Lou Gagliardi
  • Best Rat King Lolcow: Sophie Labelle
  • Best Kevin Gibes Inflated Universe Lolcow: Kindness
  • Fresh Meat: Kindness
  • Best Put to Pasture Lolcow: Lowtax
  • Best Lolcow-Related Pic: SuperStraight Selfie
  • Best Lolcow-Related Video: "A Legend Falls"
  • Best Lolcow Meltdown: "Don't Call Me Sir"
 

Ellesse_warrior

Forum Staff
🐄 On-Topic Mod 🐄
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Joined
Apr 19, 2019
Best S-Tier Lolcow:
Best A-Tier Lolcow:
Best B-Tier Lolcow:
Best C-Tier Lolcow:
Best D-Tier Lolcow:
Best F-Tier Lolcow:
Best Dramacow:
Best Artcow:
Best Careercow:
Best Skitzocow:
Best Horrorcow:
Queen of the Beauty Parlour:
Breaker of Scales:
Best Lolcow Community:
Best Internet Famous Lolcow:
Best Furfag:
Best Rat King Lolcow:
Best Kevin Gibes Inflated Universe Lolcow:
Fresh Meat:
Best Put to Pasture Lolcow:
Best Lolcow-Related Pic: "Burger Den" (Josh Saunders / KingCobraJFS)
Best Lolcow-Related Video: "JFS had a great fall" (Josh Saunders / KingCobraJFS)
Best Lolcow Meltdown:
 

break these cuffs

Piping Hot Breadsticks for everyone!
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Joined
Aug 25, 2017
 

Jack Awful

Laughs at Tards
kiwifarms.net
Joined
Apr 27, 2015
  • Best S-Tier Lolcow: Ethan Ralph
  • Best A-Tier Lolcow: June "Shoe0nHead" Lapine/Laporta
  • Best B-Tier Lolcow: Shaddai "Shadman" Prejean
  • Best C-Tier Lolcow: Blake Howard Hobbs "CommieDickGirl"
  • Best D-Tier Lolcow: Shannon Campbell/CreepShowArt
  • Best F-Tier Lolcow: Zena O'Brien/ZenaMOBrien
  • Best Dramacow: Blake Howard Hobbs "CommieDickGirl"
  • Best Artcow: Shannon Campbell/CreepShowArt
  • Best Careercow: Tariq Nasheed/Marcus Sanders
  • Best Skitzocow: Amos Yee
  • Best Horrorcow: Isabella Loretta Janke
  • Queen of the Beauty Parlour: June "Shoe0nHead" Lapine/Laporta
  • Breaker of Scales: Chantal Sarault "Foodie Beauty"
  • Best Lolcow Community: Super Smash Bros. Community
  • Best Internet Famous Lolcow: Ethan Klein/H3H3 Productions
  • Best Furfag:
  • Best Rat King Lolcow:
  • Best Kevin Gibes Inflated Universe Lolcow:
  • Fresh Meat: Isabella Loretta Janke
  • Best Put to Pasture Lolcow: Brendan Ashur/Bashurverse
  • Best Lolcow-Related Pic: "Toe Fungus"
  • Best Lolcow-Related Video: "A Legend Falls"/"Passing of the Torch" (Ethan Ralph + Christian Weston Chandler)
  • Best Lolcow Meltdown: Blake Howard Hobbs, "Don't Call Me Sir"
 

Flour

kiwifarms.net
Joined
Feb 24, 2021
  • Best S-Tier Lolcow: Kevin Gibes
  • Best A-Tier Lolcow: Melinda Leigh Scott
  • Best B-Tier Lolcow: Kindness
  • Best C-Tier Lolcow: Bardfinn
  • Best D-Tier Lolcow: Michael Bijan Afghani
  • Best F-Tier Lolcow: N/A
  • Best Dramacow: Danielle Muscato
  • Best Artcow: Shadman
  • Best Careercow: Tariq Nasheed
  • Best Skitzocow: Kindness
  • Best Horrorcow: Kevin Gibes
  • Queen of the Beauty Parlour: Shoeonhead
  • Breaker of Scales: Chantal
  • Best Lolcow Community: The Tranch
  • Best Internet Famous Lolcow: Baked Alaska
  • Best Furfag: Lou Gagliardi
  • Best Rat King Lolcow: Emmy Zje
  • Best Kevin Gibes Inflated Universe Lolcow: Kindness
  • Fresh Meat: Kindness
  • Best Put to Pasture Lolcow: Amy Carlson
  • Best Lolcow-Related Pic: Rosa Parks
  • Best Lolcow-Related Video: Buck Breaking
  • Best Lolcow Meltdown: Privacy Complaints
 

Gaz Norfman

kiwifarms.net
Joined
Mar 19, 2021
Best S-Tier Lolcow: Ethan Ralph
Best A-Tier Lolcow: Anisa Jomha
Best B-Tier Lolcow: Kelly Ronahan
Best C-Tier Lolcow: commie dick girl
Best D-Tier Lolcow: Mike Lindell
Best F-Tier Lolcow:
Best Dramacow: commie dick girl
Best Artcow: Shadman
Best Careercow: Tariq Nasheed
Best Skitzocow: Amos Yee
Best Horrorcow: Can I write in Kelly Ronahan? If not, isabella loretta janke
Queen of the Beauty Parlour: Anisa Jomha
Breaker of Scales: Tammy Slaton
Best Lolcow Community: TikTok
Best Internet Famous Lolcow: Hassan Piker
Best Furfag: idk
Best Rat King Lolcow: Sophie Labelle
Best Kevin Gibes Inflated Universe Lolcow: idk
Fresh Meat: Isabella Loretta janke
Best Put to Pasture Lolcow: Amy Carlson
Best Lolcow-Related Pic: New Rosa Parks
Best Lolcow-Related Video: Buck Breaking
Best Lolcow Meltdown: privacy complaints