The Most Autistic Dream You've Ever Had

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Kiwi Lime Pie

The tasteful spring treat. 🥝🥧🐈
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Jun 11, 2018
I might have briefly mentioned this in the weird dreams thread.

I was walking in a busy downtown area. At some point, a male voice from behind me says, "I cooked the clock," in a rather casual tone and just loud enough for me to hear over the din. I turned my head to try to see who said it, but there were enough people out walking that there was no way for me to identify who said it or why they'd say something so nonsensical.

I immediately woke up with the same "WTF?" reaction I had as my in-dream response.
 

5574

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Joined
Apr 19, 2021
one time i dreamed that an ex FtM BF of mine and i had grown old together and had a gay family of 2.5 kids and a house in an exurb of NYC or a similarly high population metro area. we were very happy together and life felt perfect in it. we taught our kids to be reasonable, healthy, happy people who could take care of themselves physically and mentally. it was nice to feel proud in-dream of our successful family

I might have briefly mentioned this in the weird dreams thread.

I was walking in a busy downtown area. At some point, a male voice from behind me says, "I cooked the clock," in a rather casual tone and just loud enough for me to hear over the din. I turned my head to try to see who said it, but there were enough people out walking that there was no way for me to identify who said it or why they'd say something so nonsensical.

I immediately woke up with the same "WTF?" reaction I had as my in-dream response.

? he was simply reminding you that he cooked the clock like you asked him. don't be such a dick dude. god damn
 

Yuuichirou Kumada

A Chad by another name
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Oct 13, 2020
Lately, I've been dreaming I kiss women I never felt any attraction to, despite finding them pretty.

For instance, last week I dreamed I reconnected with an old workmate of mine. I never found her particularly interesting, especially since I left our job - by that time, she was married and was expecting her first child. But there I was, hugging and kissing her during a break on her shift.

And last night I dreamed I kissed Ami from Sailor Moon of all people, fictional or otherwise. Not only that, I kept calling her "Ami-chan" despite my distaste for using Japanese honorifics in languages that don't require them at all.
 

Dom Cruise

True & Honest Fan
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Jun 18, 2019
I had a dream several months ago where I was hanging out with the anime character Matsurika, a female maid, from the anime Maria Holic.

To make matters stranger, we were wandering around some fisherman's wharf type area.
 

DyingStarsForever

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Joined
Jan 23, 2021
Probably any dream where I'm on the internet and am trying to read something. Since I can't actually read in a dream I get frustrated.
This happened to me just the other night. I was chatting with a coworker about an upcoming project and it was just all the wrong things about chatting rolled up into one. I made spelling errors, we kept typing after the other person had already sent, had to start over, messages were missed, the screen was dim and the font hard to read, etc. Really frustrating but waking up I can't describe it as anything but "autistic".
 

Bucka

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Apr 27, 2021
Had one this morning. Someone on a forum posted that they were going to broadcast on 366.75Mhz and to tune in. So got out my little radio, tuned in, heard some beeps and a song played. After the song, everyone that was listening in radio'd on the same frequency to cheer and say thanks, but because of half-duplex transmission we had to wait one at a time to cheer.
 

Gravemind

Not your grave, but you are welcome in it
True & Honest Fan
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Jun 1, 2020
Had one this morning. Someone on a forum posted that they were going to broadcast on 366.75Mhz and to tune in. So got out my little radio, tuned in, heard some beeps and a song played. After the song, everyone that was listening in radio'd on the same frequency to cheer and say thanks, but because of half-duplex transmission we had to wait one at a time to cheer.
You sure you didn't just fall asleep listening to Reviewbrah/TheReportOfTheWeek?
 

Brett DeLawyer

A Denial Correlation
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Joined
Jan 11, 2019
Dreamt that Chris-chan lived in a high school and asked me to find homes for all his pets, so I agreed, thinking it was just cats. Then I discovered he had multiple large, exotic pets like tigers/alligators/elephants stashed around the school, and was desperately trying to keep them from eating each other or escaping while I figured out wtf to do with them because I had promised to help.
 

Jeff Boomhauer

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Apr 15, 2020
I have too many to count, but I'll just rewrite one that I posted in the Weird Dreams thread not long ago.

I was back in Jr. High school, and I was friends with a young Rich Evans from Red Letter Media. We were just leaving class, talking about some TV show, and then he went somewhere else.
Suddenly, I was approached by Jimbo and Kearney from The Simpsons, and they asked me where Rich Evans was at, because they wanted to beat him up. They told me they'd give me $20 if I told them.

I told them and as soon as they left, I felt horrible, like I had betrayed my only friend in the world. I ran off to find Rich Evans, only to find that the bullies had already found him. Except, they weren't beating him up. They were having a conversation about Star Trek, or something. Rich asked me what was the matter, and then I just woke up on the spot.
 

Bunny Tracks

Nothing equals the splendor
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Jul 5, 2017
One time, I dreamt I was on my computer, and my neighbor busted down my door, and started screaming at me for having too many toasters.

I, for some reason, knew that he meant tabs open on my browser, and tried to argue that I didn't because I only had four, and he just kept screaming at me, and I just woke up because I didn't want to have to deal with his bullshit even in my dreams.
 

Disgruntled Pupper

Thuuder only happens wlen its raisinl
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Sep 23, 2016
A few weeks ago I was having a fairly normal dream where I was more or less going about my normal work day with an actual coworker and an old coworker who wasn't even on this job. We had just got done driving in the work truck when irl I heard bird calling outside my window. Immediately my two coworkers stopped what they were doing and the truck and the background of the dream dissappeared so that we were just standing in a grey plane. One of them told me to wake up to hear better, so I did, rolled over and listened to a few calls and then fell back asleep and into the dream. My coworkers were still there and we immediately began to debate about what the bird was, with one strongly insisting it was a Summer Tanager. Me and the other guy weren't so sure, but the first guy demanded I wake back up and report it on eBird because he knew it was a Summer Tanager.

Turns out it wasn't a Summer Tanager, it was a Yellow-Headed Blackbird. Don't try to ID birds in your sleep, kids.
 

JamesFargo

Did a dime in San Quentin.
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Mar 5, 2021
I rarely remember my dreams. I did have one dream which still haunts me: Patrick Stewart's bald head superimposed on a woman's body. What does that say about me? I don't want to know.
 

sasazuka

Standing in the school hallway.
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Jun 11, 2014
I dreamt the other day that I summoned the ghost of the late Garfield and cartoon Peter Venkman voice actor Lorenzo Music but all he wanted to talk to me about was Scientology and he wouldn't even do the Garfield voice (which doesn't even make sense since Lorenzo Music just used his regular speaking voice for most characters but it was a stupid dream).

As far as I know, Lorenzo Music wasn't even a Scientologist so I dunno where that dream came from.
 

Shitted Scaredless

True & Honest Fan
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Apr 18, 2021
Not so much a dream story as it is about what I can only describe as my "dream world". I call it that because all my dreams are weirdly vivid and, despite all being different dreams, they all take place in the same world. Which by that I mean is the weird dream versions of places I go or have been. Those? Those are all constant enough to where I can remember going to them from previous dreams in a current dream, as if it's just part of dream mes life.

So yea. I apparently created an autistic whole other world.
 

jason analberg

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Jan 4, 2021
I had a really weird dream where I was a mercenary robbing a bank, and the guy who organized the robbery was a skeleton that could vaporize you if you looked in his eyes.
 

OvercookedBacon

^ Just how I like it
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Aug 8, 2020
Last night, had one where I was going through a Wipeout or MXC style obstacle course, and after I made it to the end Charlton Heston congratulated me with a handshake.