The most dick thing you've ever done

[Nazi vegeta]

I got a coworker fired for talking shit about the boss to the customers.

Eh, typical womans behaviour in the work place.

As for me, I once tackled a kid from behind, when he was trying to recover the ball, which ended up under a pank, since we were playing soccer in a park.
He had hit his forehead on the pank so hard, he had started bleeding like a fountain and I felt super bad.

 

[Konover]

I stole money out of a cancer drive tip jar to get gas

 

[Dolphin Lundgren]

When I was a kid, I threw my brother to the blacktop because he beat me at hand ball. He injured his head.

 

[JohnDoe]

I once found out my GF was cheating on me like a typical thot, so before I dumped her ass I used a hyper-fine needle to sabotage her stash of condoms.

Watching that bitch bloat up over the next year was sweet - cheating is as much a sin as abortion, cunt.

 

[KiwiKritter]

I accidentally scratched someones car with the door to my stepdad’s truck. Everyone was stressed and had a shit day so I got stressed and didn’t tell them. I felt so bad about it, but all my fam wanted was a vacation and it was kind of sucking.

Not positive I did it because I only noticed the scratch a few minutes after but I really think it was me, because the door swung open at the time.

 

[Rand /pol/]

I once found out my GF was cheating on me like a typical thot, so before I dumped her ass I used a hyper-fine needle to sabotage her stash of condoms.

Watching that bitch bloat up over the next year was sweet - cheating is as much a sin as abortion, cunt.

Based

 

[MalWart]

There have been times where I'd be on an elevator and close the door on idiots who were waiting on other floors because they weren't paying attention. They were fat fucks who could use a good walk anyway.

 

[GV 998]

Alright kids, it's story time. The story of the most vile thing I've done, and it still haunts me.

I was an awkward little fuck at high school, only had one girlfriend in my entire life up to that point (was 16), and had few friends. But one day, I spotted one of the most beautiful girls I had ever seen. Her name was Anne. She had long, raven black hair, and wore enough makeup to make her stunning, and mask the fact that without it, she would have looked rather plain. The most striking thing you would notice about her was how vibrantly red her lipstick was. She was a semi-goth chick, and had a really nice body. Thin, sizeable breasts, the only slight downside you could point out is that her limbs were a bit long for her body. She was gangly. Not really a big deal.

Or so you might think. Because, like me, she was alone. She had no circle of friends around her, and no boyfriend hovering over her protectively. Without those barriers, I dared to approach her, and tried talking to her. She was very standoffish, asking to be left alone. But, being the hormonal teenager I was, I was persistent. I wasn't pushy. If she asked me to leave, I left. But I would come back the next day.

Finally, after two torturous weeks, she finally opened up to me, and we began to talk. Soon after that, we began dating. Apparently, her shy exterior hid beneath it an ABSOLUTE ANIMAL of lust and passion. When we went on dates, or when we could even be alone for a brief moment, she was all over me.

In short, it was the happiest part of my high school life. But oh, the folly of youth. One day, while walking home, I was taunted by some of her classmates. They called her things like "Scarecrow", among other things that made me want to hit them, all the while knowing I would not. Here's where it turns tragic, and it is entirely my fault. I let those words plant and fester in me, like some diseased weed. I began to see myself being her boyfriend as a kind of humiliating thing I was doing wrong. And to make it worse, I was a coward, so the way I ended that relationship was by simply avoiding her like she was the plague.

For the next few months, after her initial sadness, we pretended like the other didn't exist. Inside I was tortured, because by then I had learned my terrible mistake. I wanted SO BADLY to go to her...to apologize. To tell her that I loved her. But my fear prevented me from even making things right! After those few months, she moved away, her father was military and had been transferred. I had lost her forever.

I have never forgiven myself for letting myself become such a victim to fear. First I let fear dominate me because I was worried about what PEOPLE I DIDN'T EVEN CARE ABOUT thought of me. And then the fear of rejection from her.

I am older now, and happily married.... But still (and my wife knows this story well), that sometimes I think what might have been. Would Anne and I have stayed together? Might we have gotten married and had a family? Would it have ended pettily, like so many high school relationships do? I don't know, and I never will. I only know that I hope she has a happy and successful life. She deserves it, so much more than I do.

The only thing I gained from this experience is that I never let myself become a victim of fear like that again....Still wasn't worth it.

 

[Dragon Face]

Spoiler: NSFL

Threw a period pad on public bathroom floor and then blamed it on someone. School staff made her pick my period pad up, not knowing it's mine.

 

[Diabeetus]

Alright kids, it's story time. The story of the most vile thing I've done, and it still haunts me.

I was an awkward little fuck at high school, only had one girlfriend in my entire life up to that point (was 16), and had few friends. But one day, I spotted one of the most beautiful girls I had ever seen. Her name was Anne. She had long, raven black hair, and wore enough makeup to make her stunning, and mask the fact that without it, she would have looked rather plain. The most striking thing you would notice about her was how vibrantly red her lipstick was. She was a semi-goth chick, and had a really nice body. Thin, sizeable breasts, the only slight downside you could point out is that her limbs were a bit long for her body. She was gangly. Not really a big deal.

Or so you might think. Because, like me, she was alone. She had no circle of friends around her, and no boyfriend hovering over her protectively. Without those barriers, I dared to approach her, and tried talking to her. She was very standoffish, asking to be left alone. But, being the hormonal teenager I was, I was persistent. I wasn't pushy. If she asked me to leave, I left. But I would come back the next day.

Finally, after two torturous weeks, she finally opened up to me, and we began to talk. Soon after that, we began dating. Apparently, her shy exterior hid beneath it an ABSOLUTE ANIMAL of lust and passion. When we went on dates, or when we could even be alone for a brief moment, she was all over me.

In short, it was the happiest part of my high school life. But oh, the folly of youth. One day, while walking home, I was taunted by some of her classmates. They called her things like "Scarecrow", among other things that made me want to hit them, all the while knowing I would not. Here's where it turns tragic, and it is entirely my fault. I let those words plant and fester in me, like some diseased weed. I began to see myself being her boyfriend as a kind of humiliating thing I was doing wrong. And to make it worse, I was a coward, so the way I ended that relationship was by simply avoiding her like she was the plague.

For the next few months, after her initial sadness, we pretended like the other didn't exist. Inside I was tortured, because by then I had learned my terrible mistake. I wanted SO BADLY to go to her...to apologize. To tell her that I loved her. But my fear prevented me from even making things right! After those few months, she moved away, her father was military and had been transferred. I had lost her forever.

I have never forgiven myself for letting myself become such a victim to fear. First I let fear dominate me because I was worried about what PEOPLE I DIDN'T EVEN CARE ABOUT thought of me. And then the fear of rejection from her.

I am older now, and happily married.... But still (and my wife knows this story well), that sometimes I think what might have been. Would Anne and I have stayed together? Might we have gotten married and had a family? Would it have ended pettily, like so many high school relationships do? I don't know, and I never will. I only know that I hope she has a happy and successful life. She deserves it, so much more than I do.

The only thing I gained from this experience is that I never let myself become a victim of fear like that again....Still wasn't worth it.

This made me really sad. I'm sorry, guy. No one deserves to be in a situation like that, even considering how shitty life is.

Do you know their full name? Maybe you can find them on Facebook or Twitter or Instagram or something. It wouldn't be as significant as an apology in real life, but it'd be something.

 

[Feraligatr]

When I was in middle school, I spun a very anorexic girl around by her hands and “accidentally” let go. She hit the pavement and broke her wrist.

I was pissed because she gave me headlice a couple weeks prior and told everyone I was dirty behind my back without acknowledging the source, but I didn’t intend breaking her wrist.

 

[BeanBidan]

Here's another thing. Although i would say the injun deserved it.
a year after I moved from Hawaii (age 6) to Texas. I went to this elementary school that was filled with the future highschool football players and cheerleaders. Anyways there was this one Native American kid named Sunny and he used to bully me because I was shorter than him. Well one day at recess he said something to me that pissed me off.
(when you do your 5 laps for PE you get the rest of the time to play recess), back then I was a little energetic runaholic so I did an extra lap, upon seeing that stupid Indian near the jungle gym I picked up speed around the end and jumped on his back and started pulling his hair and punching the back of his head. The nigga starts crying and he moved 2 days later. So i got rid of the last native American in that small town.

In 3rd grade, began our history with a autistic kid named Aaron Akridge. Literally the most non-sensical jibber jabber tard who would go ape shit if you whistled. After recess he always tried racing us back to the class because he thought he was sonic. Any who one day I decided to beat him to piss him off and he chases me and is crying and doing retard rage. I laugh and enter the room. He goes in and asks me why I did it(??) and I call him a retard and kick him in the balls twice, he falls on the floor crying and trying to breathe. I tell everyone he started it and they actually believe me because this kid was known to hit others and he chased a girl all the time to the point she kinda got PTSD from him LMAO. Well we had some gay was court thing and everyone said Guilty and he's actually yelling that he doesn't want to go to jail but it was just time out from recess. I ended up joining him for it anyways because I said fuck during math.

 

[James Howlett]

Some ditz was trying to back up for parallel parking down town. She asked me if she had enough room. I just repeated "You're good...you're good..." until she back into another car and set of the alarm. I then continued my walk to the bar.

 

[GV 998]

This made me really sad. I'm sorry, guy. No one deserves to be in a situation like that, even considering how shitty life is.

Do you know their full name? Maybe you can find them on Facebook or Twitter or Instagram or something. It wouldn't be as significant as an apology in real life, but it'd be something.

I already tried that, unfortunately. Either she isn't on Facebook or she got married and doesn't use her maiden name.

 

[protomartyr]

I have been known to litter on occasion. That's about it though. I'm quite zen.

 

[Francis E. Dec Esc.]

My company had a system down at Fort Benning, and I was working at Fort Gordon, but instead of having to drive all the way across Georgia I lied to my boss that I was at Fort Jackson and made them fly someone out to fix it.

 

[polonium]

When I was a kid, we had a mildly retarded kid in the village that got the bus to school with the regular kids. Someone had been eating a sweet and spat it out and left it on the window ledge of the bus, I saw it there and picked it up and pretended to be friendly with the retarded kid and offered him "my last sweet" and he ate it. Little fucker was suspicious too because it had this gross black mark on it from being on the rubber window ledge but I said it was where it was pressed up against another one and he fell for it.

 

[Ilackcreativity]

So when I was in high school we had vending machines that accepted debit cards, and when you made a purchase with a debit card you had to press a red X to cancel. Sometimes people would forget to cancel and I would buy something from the machines when they did so I wouldn't have to spend my own money.

 

[ShroomGender]

A buddy of mine asked me to load magazines for him at the shooting range. I slipped a couple boxes of blanks into the range bag, loaded his mags with one live round on top, and blanks the rest of the way down.

Took him 45 minutes to realize why he "couldn't hit the target." and I kept feeding him bad advice on what he should try to "fix" his aim.

 

[Randy Lahey]

Alright kids, it's story time. The story of the most vile thing I've done, and it still haunts me.

I was an awkward little fuck at high school, only had one girlfriend in my entire life up to that point (was 16), and had few friends. But one day, I spotted one of the most beautiful girls I had ever seen. Her name was Anne. She had long, raven black hair, and wore enough makeup to make her stunning, and mask the fact that without it, she would have looked rather plain. The most striking thing you would notice about her was how vibrantly red her lipstick was. She was a semi-goth chick, and had a really nice body. Thin, sizeable breasts, the only slight downside you could point out is that her limbs were a bit long for her body. She was gangly. Not really a big deal.

Or so you might think. Because, like me, she was alone. She had no circle of friends around her, and no boyfriend hovering over her protectively. Without those barriers, I dared to approach her, and tried talking to her. She was very standoffish, asking to be left alone. But, being the hormonal teenager I was, I was persistent. I wasn't pushy. If she asked me to leave, I left. But I would come back the next day.

Finally, after two torturous weeks, she finally opened up to me, and we began to talk. Soon after that, we began dating. Apparently, her shy exterior hid beneath it an ABSOLUTE ANIMAL of lust and passion. When we went on dates, or when we could even be alone for a brief moment, she was all over me.

In short, it was the happiest part of my high school life. But oh, the folly of youth. One day, while walking home, I was taunted by some of her classmates. They called her things like "Scarecrow", among other things that made me want to hit them, all the while knowing I would not. Here's where it turns tragic, and it is entirely my fault. I let those words plant and fester in me, like some diseased weed. I began to see myself being her boyfriend as a kind of humiliating thing I was doing wrong. And to make it worse, I was a coward, so the way I ended that relationship was by simply avoiding her like she was the plague.

For the next few months, after her initial sadness, we pretended like the other didn't exist. Inside I was tortured, because by then I had learned my terrible mistake. I wanted SO BADLY to go to her...to apologize. To tell her that I loved her. But my fear prevented me from even making things right! After those few months, she moved away, her father was military and had been transferred. I had lost her forever.

I have never forgiven myself for letting myself become such a victim to fear. First I let fear dominate me because I was worried about what PEOPLE I DIDN'T EVEN CARE ABOUT thought of me. And then the fear of rejection from her.

I am older now, and happily married.... But still (and my wife knows this story well), that sometimes I think what might have been. Would Anne and I have stayed together? Might we have gotten married and had a family? Would it have ended pettily, like so many high school relationships do? I don't know, and I never will. I only know that I hope she has a happy and successful life. She deserves it, so much more than I do.

The only thing I gained from this experience is that I never let myself become a victim of fear like that again....Still wasn't worth it.

is this a copypasta?