Kiwi Farms

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I was comparing the current state of Something Awful and it's place as the launching platform of the anti-Star Citizen rhetoric as ironic in the SA thread earlier when it occurred to me that both sides of this hilarious issue are operating at maximum 'tism levels without a hint of understanding just how similar they are. One side sychophantically defends a pudgy Scottish spaceman with a coke habit most assuredly measured in "Pablo's" while the other has rallied around the king of delusion, Derek "Coke Machine" Smart. Both are equally terrible and a perfect match for each other, engaging in an internet cripple fight that may just be on a scale never before realized.

Star Citizen, for those of you that have jobs, attractive sex partners and an absence on the state sex offender list is a theoretical video game originally pitched in 2012 by Chris Roberts, creator of the Wing Commander games that were immediately over shadowed by superior space sims from before and after like Elite, X-Wing, TIE Fighter, Freespace and Where in Space is Carmen San Diego?. He also made Freelancer, but instead of making it, he almost bankrupted Microsoft's game division and got kicked out on his ass for being a coked out moron with no idea what "Scope Creep" and "Intelligent engineering and project management" meant. He threw together a really cringe inducing kickstarter video for the project and got internet space autists all riled up. He got some of his buddies together after making a fast 2 mil on the campaign and started an official site for people to "pledge" to make his dream game.

Chief among these early employees was known internet deviant Ben "Bandit Loaf" Lesnick. A man obsessed with low effort internet jokes and a pretty local TV weather lady whom he kept hundreds of pictures of on his website because that's a totally uncreepy guy thing to do. Ben is also super goddamed fat to the point of looking like a midget that got a hold of some mad scientist's growth serum without realizing it wouldn't fix the proportions his dwarfism gave him. Ben is the HNIC of being Chris Roberts' toady, and also the single worst community manager to ever work for any company. By creating an echo chamber of weirdo nerds talking about pedophilia, rape and space furrism on the official RSI forums on which Star Citizen is based, he has made a community so toxic in nature you wonder if you'd have to pay $10 to be a member.

Speaking of $10, we have the opposition, Something Awful, the forum founded during the early days of the internet that was once funny, and then became the breeding ground for what would become weird twitter, a good chunk of the SJW movement and troons. Something Awful actually started pretty split about the Star Citizen project, with some goons actually investing 5 digit numbers in to the company and defending their "game" like it was a hot dog stand. But then Derek Smart stepped in, wrote a blog about how evil Star Citizen was, low effort doxx'd a few employees and started posting any and every story he heard about development regardless of source. He managed to do all this while making some very good points about the way the project had warped out of control, but he also managed to make a lot of really dumb claims and promises that got pissed back in his face a few times. This created an equally toxic community of goons who were now engaged in the retard wrassle-mania that has become reddit v. something awful by having a subreddit sprout up just to "counter troll" the goons that was equally sad in their attempts. I refuse to capitalize either name in this because it's more effort than either deserves.

But now, we have a war between the Goons, led by Derek Smart, who has done something very similar in the past to what he is rallying against, and Reddit/the official RSI forums, led by a hodge podge of pedophiles and furries where the only positive outcome seems to be suicide pacts and a cure for space-autism.

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