Theme-songs for lolcows -

Abethedemon

Trve and Honest
kiwifarms.net
Not exactly a specific lolcow, but I feel like this is a good character study of a lolcow of the classic variety. It's got the pathetic loner man child who has a crush on someone unattainable, only this guy goes one step further.
 

TheGreatCitracett

Reach me on the phone... Dial 2-69-BONE
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Russell Greer

Good song, and also a perfect theme song for incels, loveshies, CWC, and the many creepy kissless virgins who simply cannot understand why women wouldn't want to date them, and don't buy into their constant bragging of their sexual prowess.
 
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Abethedemon

Trve and Honest
kiwifarms.net
I think this song is fitting for Randy Stair, as the chorus mentions "A ghost wandering alone" and he wanted to be a ghost more than anything in the world. The song also describes a sort of murder-suicide situation, which is also fitting. In addition, the music video is about a kids show.
 

Microlab

Chihuahuas are a figment of your imagination
kiwifarms.net
This one reminds me of most classic-style lolcows. Your Pixyteris, oldschool ADFs, Deviantart cartoon autists, and, of course, CWCs.

And as a bonus it includes in-song jeering, so it's sort of like Kiwifarms' theme, too.
 
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