Thread for functioning and working alcoholics -

U

UQ 770

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kiwifarms.net
Maybe things are different in Russia or Africa or something but what I am suggesting is both correct and not at all unusual. I know many many people in my somewhat conservative country on daily permanent benzo scrip. The less trustworthy ones may be required to dose at a pharmacy, or at least collect no more than a few days supply at a time. You can discuss these fears with the prescribing doctor, who will be more than happy to discuss his expectations, how titration and tapering will work etc. I'm not going to post more on the matter since this is less about the surface topic than your attachment to the way you are living now/resistance to change
I had a therapist (somewhat unprofessionally) reveal to me that there was a system in place to handle patients that were percieved to be looking for specific drugs. The few details I understood from the encounter were enough to make me give up on the idea. Blacklists, etc, stuff that can show up on a background check and employers would certainly know about it. Unless the man was insane himself, I'm inclined to believe his testimony.
 

Underestimated Nutria

kiwifarms.net
I had a therapist (somewhat unprofessionally) reveal to me that there was a system in place to handle patients that were percieved to be looking for specific drugs. The few details I understood from the encounter were enough to make me give up on the idea. Blacklists, etc, stuff that can show up on a background check and employers would certainly know about it. Unless the man was insane himself, I'm inclined to believe his testimony.
There is no such thing in any country I have heard of. There is such a thing as medical confidentiality. Doctors look askance at drug seekers, not people looking for legitimate pharmacotherapy. Again, discuss these fears with an actual doctor. Say to him, hey, if I get a scrip from you, will I be put on a list, gulaged etc?
 
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U

UQ 770

Guest
kiwifarms.net
There is no such thing in any country I have heard of. There is such a thing as medical confidentiality. Doctors look askance at drug seekers, not people looking for legitimate pharmacotherapy. Again, discuss these fears with an actual doctor. Say to him, hey, if I get a scrip from you, will I be put on a list, gulaged etc?
I highly doubt just asking them will make them forthcoming about such a thing. If anything, being nosy about that kind of thing probably makes you subject to scrutiny in the first place. People lost careers and such over the opioid crisis, they are very defensive now and not friendly to any new patient seeking medication. I understand their postion of course, but its likewise not fun being treated like a criminal just because I tried to get informed about the topic ahead of time.

Just this discussion we've had here alone should highlight my total exhaustion I've experienced dealing with therapy altogether. I need a drink.
 

Underestimated Nutria

kiwifarms.net
I highly doubt just asking them will make them forthcoming about such a thing. If anything, being nosy about that kind of thing probably makes you subject to scrutiny in the first place. People lost careers and such over the opioid crisis, they are very defensive now and not friendly to any new patient seeking medication. I understand their postion of course, but its likewise not fun being treated like a criminal just because I tried to get informed about the topic ahead of time.

Just this discussion we've had here alone should highlight my total exhaustion I've experienced dealing with therapy altogether. I need a drink.
Just admit you love living the way you are now. If there was a button you could press to solve all your problems, you would be concerned about repetitive strain injury, bursitis and carpal tunnel. What if I fall down when I press the button? What if it springs back and hits me in the face? What if it's secretly connected to a nuclear arsenal? Your life must be awesome cuz you sure sound committed to it.
 
U

UQ 770

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kiwifarms.net
If there was a button you could press to solve all your problems, you would be concerned about repetitive strain injury, bursitis and carpal tunnel.
I'd be concerned but probably not to the extent that I am right now. Isn't that supposed to be the point of technology?

What if it's secretly connected to a nuclear arsenal?
I've have more fun than distress thinking about this one, to be completely honest with you.
 
U

UQ 770

Guest
kiwifarms.net
One thing that occured to me awhile back on this topic is that a very large number of treatment options either involve or heavily suggest the use of support groups, religious or otherwise. Meanwhile, I can't think of anything that'd make me want a drink more than being around a bunch of pathetic losers with the same issue. Or just being around people in general, these days.
 
One thing that occured to me awhile back on this topic is that a very large number of treatment options either involve or heavily suggest the use of support groups, religious or otherwise. Meanwhile, I can't think of anything that'd make me want a drink more than being around a bunch of pathetic losers with the same issue. Or just being around people in general, these days.
Good job turning this thread into the @Locomotive Derangement Pity Party.
 

Karl_der_Grosse

GG Allin once threw his poop at me.
kiwifarms.net
"I can't go to therapists and ask for appropriate medication because they'll put me on a super-secret Watch List. I can't go to therapists to treat my underlying problems because psychologists are all a bunch of elitist assholes. I can't go seek treatment in any way for my alcohol dependency because most forms of treatment involve me actually being around other people, and I can't have that. Other people with my exact chemical dependency issues are a bunch of pathetic losers whom I'm too good to be around. It makes me want to drink being around people. Guess I'll sit here and drink, which is really what I want to do anyway."

Dude, you've given a whole bunch of excuses in this thread and they're all bullshit. You know what AA meetings are actually like? It's an hour or so out of your schedule to hear a bunch of stories and maybe get some good advice. Don't like the pseudo-religious trappings? Ignore them. They won't throw you out of the meeting for not doing your homework. You know what does help with psycho-social problems? Helping other people. Being there to support them. Listening to them talk about their struggles. It helps them and it helps you. As far as them being pathetic losers? Anecdotal, but I used to go to an AA meeting where they could buy half the state from their pocket change.

I don't even go to AA meetings. I used to. AA didn't solve my problems, but I've heard some of the funniest, and most fucked up stories at meetings. If nothing else, going to recovery meetings, AA or otherwise, is an hour of entertainment you'd otherwise spend drinking. It's even free!
 

V0dka

I'm drunk.
kiwifarms.net
Functioning or not, if your using it as a coping mechanism then you are going to at some point see it become a net detriment in your life.

Morality aside, think of how much money you will save if your not funding a habit.
powerlevels

I'm not sure if you realize exactly why many drink. If they weren't drinking they wouldn't be spending money because they wouldn't be functioning. In some cases, you need to drink just to go out to to do the shopping. Like if my access to either alcohol and pain medication was completely cut off, I would just kill myself, because I wouldn't be able to function.

And I've done all the stuff, I walk a few miles every day, I eat right, I go to the therapist (which just reminds me out loud why I should be dead really) etc etc, but I have a drink and death just seems like less off an option.

This isn't just some "oh I'm down the dumps" thing, I mean, I'm sure some are. But not everyone. Should probably be thankful I'm not on heroin.
 
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powerlevels

I'm not sure if you realize exactly why many drink. If they weren't drinking they wouldn't be spending money because they wouldn't be functioning. In some cases, you need to drink just to go out to to do the shopping. Like if my access to either alcohol and pain medication was completely cut off, I would just kill myself, because I wouldn't be able to function.

And I've done all the stuff, I walk a few miles every day, I eat right, I go to the therapist (which just reminds me out loud why I should be dead really) etc etc, but I have a drink and death just seems like less off an option.

This isn't just some "oh I'm down the dumps" thing, I mean, I'm sure some are. But not everyone. Should probably be thankful I'm not on heroin.
Fair point to make. Some people aren't able to function normally, or it becomes the new normal. I've seen people who have managed to turn their lives around. I've seen some who have literally slipped into oblivion because of their alcoholism. Given a societal choice, I'd choose functioning alcoholics over non-functioning any day, because at least they mainly have their shit together.

Also weird observation. Most of the functioning alcoholics I've met were corporate women. It's hard to have the same respect for your boss, when you find them passed out in a puddle of vomit and piss.
 

V0dka

I'm drunk.
kiwifarms.net
Also weird observation. Most of the functioning alcoholics I've met were corporate women. It's hard to have the same respect for your boss, when you find them passed out in a puddle of vomit and piss.
It's still impressive to me, because even though they might get spotted in such a way by a co-worker, most people won't be aware, and to society at large they are a functional moving part. They are still contributing to society more than me making hot takes on the ass end of the internet.
 

guccigash

Greyfriars Jandek
kiwifarms.net
There is an immaculately dressed woman who sits on a bench at the park I go to at like 7am each day. Always wears something bright red. She's usually smoking so I had assumed she doesn't smoke at work or in the house so that's her smoking spot until I saw her have a crafty sip of a can of strong cider.

I dunno if the British Army is any different now but my uncle was smashing the alcohol the whole time there (along with everyone else as he tells it) then going out on marches/patrol early next day. he carried on unabated after he left at 45. Just like his Dad before him. Having that structure (and that drinking culture also) is a dangerous combination creating the mirage of a "functioning" life, then when civvy street calls......
 

V0dka

I'm drunk.
kiwifarms.net
There is an immaculately dressed woman who sits on a bench at the park I go to at like 7am each day. Always wears something bright red. She's usually smoking so I had assumed she doesn't smoke at work or in the house so that's her smoking spot until I saw her have a crafty sip of a can of strong cider.

I dunno if the British Army is any different now but my uncle was smashing the alcohol the whole time there (along with everyone else as he tells it) then going out on marches/patrol early next day. he carried on unabated after he left at 45. Just like his Dad before him. Having that structure (and that drinking culture also) is a dangerous combination creating the mirage of a "functioning" life, then when civvy street calls......
You do what you have to do. People have responsibilities, they have mental trauma, etc etc. Either they find something for them to continue functioning, or they kill themselves.

That's why I wonder sometimes, are some people just innately psychologically weak? You've heard of the type of person that is raised in an abusive household with beatings and yet they become a fully functioning and successful member of society. While someone from a less severe upbringing, might have a few bad life events and throw themselves off a bridge.

I often think about if people have a biologically or behavioural coping mechanism, that varies person to person. Not learnable, just, how they are wired.
 

a feel

Guns don't kill people, troons kill people.
kiwifarms.net
I often think about if people have a biologically or behavioural coping mechanism, that varies person to person. Not learnable, just, how they are wired.
They do. It's called 'resilience' - the thing we lack that makes us alcoholics (along with many other contributing factors, but lack of resilience makes us extra vulnerable in the first place).
 
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Ugh, it's a tough one.

I personally have alcoholic tendencies but the circumstances of my life allow me to avoid falling into alcoholism. Probably for a lot of the same reasons as other people here have said.

So I'll share my personal stories on the subject, I have a few.

My father is a "functioning and working" alcoholic, but just barely. But not all of that is due to the alcohol...
As I've gotten older and talked to him more, I've come to understand it's all based on anxiety, especially social anxiety.
Social anxiety was my big reason for drinking. I wanted to meet people, but the actual process of meeting people made me so anxious I would be fucking weird and make things worse. Of course being a drunken asshole doesn't give the best first impression, but at least I didn't give a fuck at the time.

Then the next day reliving every cringy moment just adds more anxiety. Hooray vicious cycles!

I work with a dude who is a functioning alcoholic, young guy, mid 20s. He's a fucking go-getter, busts his ass. Also drinks very heavily, and finds himself frozen with anxiety at times at the thought of going out in public. He's actually doing much better than he was, he's not drinking before work anymore...

His dad, from what he has told me, was basically the same, but worse. Horrible social anxiety to the point of becoming agoraphobic. Drinks to cope with the anxiety. Is physically dependent on alcohol.


So I guess my point here is, the underlying symptom of anxiety seemed to be the root cause in all these instances. So if you are in that position, a simple thing to try would be going to your regular old primary care doctor (or get one if you don't have one), and tell them you're having problems with anxiety. A small dose of kolonopin(I'm sure I spelled that wrong) can do wonders. You don't necessarily even have to deal with a therapist if you just can't stand the idea, although it bears repeating that therapy does help a lot of people.

But if you're frozen with anxiety I can imagine telling you to spill your guts to a stranger maybe just makes you want to drink more. I can sympathize. I also am a stubborn asshole just smart enough to be right more often than not (or at least perceive it that way), and thus I think I know better than everyone, which obviously causes more trouble with therapy.

Like I said, personally although I've got the tendency and it runs in the family, at the moment I'm not an active alcoholic. But every drink I have just makes the next one seem all the better, and I like getting drunk more than being drunk. If my social circle included more drinking I'd be right back at it....

Finally, the lame old cliche of "You have to want to get better" is sadly reality. Do you actually want to stop drinking, or do you just want to minimize the negative consequences for it? I couldn't quit smoking until I got fed up with smoking. When I "knew I should quit" I could halfheartedly start the process but never stick with it. Because I didn't want to quit.
 
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B

BF 388

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kiwifarms.net
Just an update. I managed to get through this week with three bottles of whisky, whilst exceeding and blasting my work requirements out the ass.

I will die, I know, I'm just running a competition between liver cancer and self loathing.
 

V0dka

I'm drunk.
kiwifarms.net
inally, the lame old cliche of "You have to want to get better" is sadly reality. Do you actually want to stop drinking, or do you just want to minimize the negative consequences for it? I couldn't quit smoking until I got fed up with smoking. When I "knew I should quit" I could halfheartedly start the process but never stick with it. Because I didn't want to quit.
If you think you can quit and keep functioning, that's the real question. Some people don't have the luxury of being a celebrity that books themselves into a detox clinic for months because they've become completely incapacitated if they can't drink/take drugs. Regular people don't have that luxury.

Can you quit and keep functioning?
 
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