UK General Election 2017 Salt -

[D.Va]

Nobody's won yet but there's lots of shitflinging already so let's have a thread for it. There'll be more salt later tonight or tomorrow when the results are in, so here goes.

Some British Twitter comedian has been campaigning to hide all the copies of The Sun:

Spoiler: the absolute madmen

These ones didn't quite get it and actually paid for the newspapers instead

This sparked a bit of moral outrage

 

[ICametoLurk]

UKIP will win and restore UK back to its natural borders.

 

[Lorento]

I'm making my prediction. He can do it, slow and steady.

 

[ES 148]

The Daily Mail had the most reasonable front page, to be honest. The Mirror had a picture of May doing a silly face and called it 'THE FACE OF FEAR'.

 

[nice]

These ones didn't quite get it and actually paid for the newspapers instead
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"Let's financially support The Sun + other newspapers that I disagree with! That'll show them!"

 

[QI 541]

Whoever wins, everyone loses.

 

[NIGGO KILLA]

Feel bad for you tea drinks

You get invaded by brown people and get shit leaders that embrace them or want to fuck over your grandmother

What are you going to do on election night?

 

[AnAspieWithAVengeance]

What are you going to do on election night?

Go to bed.

 

[LulzKiller]

Reminder that all of my choices who to vote for were shit and I basically had to hold my nose with my own choice. Salt from any party will be fun, sure is fun being center-left and anti-islam ain't it.

 

[Lorento]

Reminder that all of my choices who to vote for were shit and I basically had to hold my nose with my own choice. Salt from any party will be fun, sure is fun being center-left and anti-islam ain't it.

Preach, my brother. We're fucked.

 

[Kari Kamiya]

I'm an ignorant American, however, for most of the day I'll be checking out the UK Election thread over on the Serebii forums since that one will be easier to check up on than the 2016 election thread. The thread's probably not going to be a big salt storm tonight, but I've picked out some pre-election whining, so these snivelers may be the bigger source of entertainment later.

Another ignorant American making a comment about UK politics:

"I'm too young to vote, but adhere to my needs!"

And by "inevitably moan" I hope they mean "REEEEEEE".

 

[CWCissey]

Bringing this over from the Snap Election thread. The watchlist if (when?) Labour lose.

JK Rowling (Serial Numpty)
Russell Brand (Unfunny smackhead sex fiend)
Eddie Izzard (Comedian who only told one good joke)
Frankie Boyle (Washed up Scottish comedian who got fat)
Ricky Gervais (Unfunny fat smug twat)
James Cordon (Ricky Gervais 2.0)
Bob Geldof (Wrote one good song, keeps using Africa as a piggy bank at Christmas, comments on UK policies despite being Irish)
Graham Linehan (We have a thread on him, wrote Father Ted)
Adrian Edmondson (actually funny comedian, may be more professional, so don't get your hopes up)
Steve Coogan (A-ha!)
Tim Burgess (Lead singer of The Charlatans, owner of the world's stupidest haircut)
Graham Coxon (Guitarist of Blur, example of why you should never quit drinking)
Dave Rowntree (Blur's drummer, many times failed Labour MP, actual Labour Councillor for Norwich Uni so will be on damage control)
Johnny Marr (Music God, Politics Idiot)
Nick Frost (Simon Pegg's fat friend)
Lily Allen (The black sheep of the Allen family)
Brian Cox (Mancunian scientist, soothing voice, looks like he was in a band, actually was, may not go overboard with rage)
Cabbage (Mancunian punk rockers, campaigning for Corbyn during shows. Good band, shit politics)
Hooton Tennis Club (Scouse Indie band)
Big Ben (Novelty Twitter account, usually only says 'BONG!' every hour but didn't disappoint with Brexit or Trump)

Added by @Ginger Piglet
Charlotte Church (Welsh child star turned non entity)
Daniel Radcliffe (YOU'RE A WIZARD HARRY)
Benedict Cumberbatch (crap actor known for haranguing audiences about politics after performances)
Caitlin Moran (Crap egotistical writer, can't handle it when a show about her gets cancelled)

Added by @TheImportantFart
Stephen Hawking (Smartest man in the world, so likely to keep his vocaloid shut, but you never know)

Added by @Ravenor
Russell Howard (Wonky eyed comedian who thinks the height of comedy is yelling)
Miranda Hart (Freakishly proportioned lady comic)

 

[TheImportantFart]

Oh boy. Only one thing to say now:

 

[Ginger Piglet]

6.30 pm here in the Pig Pen. I quite like that pre-emptive Sun hiding. That's not pathetic and immature at all, oh no.

Anyhow. I know we've not started yet, but I logged onto Facebook and someone I know on there has this as their profile picture. I'm not into puerile name calling but FUCKING LOL.

 

[Ginger Piglet]

Double posting, don't care.

Have a read of this atsimu from the Labour Party Facebook page. Our Spiritual Liege, Saint Jeremy of the Weird-beards, apparently is responsible for the Good Friday peace agreement that John Major commenced and Tony Blair finalised. Deary me.

 

[Lorento]

https://www.theguardian.com/politics/live/2017/jun/08/general-election-2017-uk-polling-day-live

Pre-emptively putting this in here. The Guardian Comment Section is going to be fantastic.

 

[PerishableDryGoods]

why doesnt the poll have russian hackers as an option?

 

[Ginger Piglet]

STRAW POLL: Does anyone actually think a 12 year old child wrote this?

Incidentally, Ashara Wood, given her profile pic is a foxy-woxy with a Labour frame round it, and who has a thread on here for being a conspiratarded she-hippie relic, is likely to be a good source of salt methinks.

 

[Magique]

Do not forget to put your tumblr to #uk or your twitter #tears or #literally crying

https://www.tumblr.com/search/#uk

 

[Shokew]

Feel bad for you tea drinks

You get invaded by brown people and get shit leaders that embrace them or want to fuck over your grandmother

What are you going to do on election night?

Go to work, lurk some more here,
... Because I'm 'Murican. I do sympathize with your disappointment & anger right now, however.

That, my country could use more than 2 parties, to be serious for a minute (At least you guys have THAT going for you.).