Ulillillia - The Platform Master

[autism420]

Author, dreamer, gamer, groundskeeper, batshit insane. That about sums up Nick Smith aka Ulillillia.

It's hard to know where to start with Nick. I've been following him since before I had even heard of Chris. He's not exactly a lolcow, he's too smart to be one. He does provide interesting content but it is never hilarious.

He is afraid of mirrors and will route out a map of any place he has to go to in order to avoid them. He is afraid of water. He is afraid of the word "people". He does not know what sex is.

Spoiler: He has an insane sleep schedule that only he understands

If you were to scan through my blog, you can see that the times I go to bed and wake up shift constantly going a whole cycle usually once every two weeks. What do you think of 11:30 PM as being? Late at night? Past bedtime? That's what most think, but how about just waking up or being awake for 6 hours by this time? Also, what do you think 9:00 AM as being? The time to be at work? Early in the morning? Still being asleep? How about it being bedtime? This is just what my sleep-wake cycle is like. To most, 2:00 AM is very late at night or extremely early in the morning. On one day, I may wake up at that time. A week later, I'd be going to bed at that time. Another week later, I'd be waking up at that time. I'm typing this at 3:30 AM if that tells anything. I've been finishing up typing the last of the school history document at around 2:15 AM. I woke up this day at 11:57 AM. A week later, I'll be waking up around 11:00 PM. It constantly shifts. I refer to it as a twenty-five forty cycle (being 25 hours, 40 minutes). Check my blog for details. The wake up time is when I officially get out of bed and the time I go to bed is when I officially go to bed (rather than the exact moment I wake up or fall asleep). There are some odd exceptions to this such as when I sleep 18 hours (25 hours of nonstop sleep is my record) or sleep for just 6 or forced to be awake for 20 hours (53 hours of being awake nonstop is my record).

He refuses to get on disability even though he would easily qualify. He lives with his sister who somehow supports him. He works minimum hours each week to reduce his monthly rent by $200. He only eats cheese pizza which has gone through his unique "degreasing" method (he used to also eat Hamburger Helper with no hamburger but quit a few years ago). He does not trust the internet (specifically Google). He was to be the star of a documentary whose creators fell off the face of the earth after filming.

Uli has also been working on a video game based off of his own "mind game" for a few years now. It is appealing only to him.

There is so much to say about him that it's hard to know where to start. He posts on Facebook regularly, going in to great detail about what JRPG he is currently investing hundreds of hours into.

I implore you to attempt to navigate his website, located at http://www.ulillillia.us/

The ED article about him has a lot of content, and is not overly negative.

https://encyclopediadramatica.se/Ulillillia

My apologies for posting this in "off-topic", but I was told that since he is not a lolcow that this would be the best place for discussion.

 

[Drossel]

Ulillillia is not a lolcow. He's an eccentric and a very interesting guy. I've bought his book, recently finished it and enjoyed it.
If I was given a chance to hang out with any known internet personality, it would definitely be Uli.

 

[Wet]

Uli is great! He got me in the habit of de-greasing my pizzas.

It saves me dozens of calories per slice.

 

[Avocado]

I've always been kind of fascinated with this guy. He's just so fucking weird and he can barely function, but he doesn't sperg out or call attention to himself or really do anything that would qualify him as a lolcow. "Interesting" is probably the best word to describe him.

His website is a time sink if you like reading about weird people, by the way. Marvel at how he manages to quantify and calculate literally every single aspect of life as if life itself were a video game.

These are my favorites for within each of 34 categories. The numbers in parentheses indicate compatibility*. Do note that there is a 10% logarithmic margin of error at best for these and 20% is the typical. For favorites and dislikes, however, it's the other way around where 10% is the most common. Items with a "~" before it indicate that the item has a 20% logarithmic margin of error instead. A rating of 30, for example, could mean it's somewhere from 27.3 to 33. For the ~30, it'd be from 25 to 36. In general multiply and divide the number given by 1.1 (or 1.2 for the ~) to find the range.

By my definitions, a minor favorite is something with a compatibility of 6 to before 25. A favorite is from 25 to before 100. A high favorite is anything of 100 to 400 and a top favorite is anything of at least 400. For the opposite side, the same thing applies, except the numbers are negative. Naturally, much beyond even 30 (or -30) is rarely seen.

--
3. Food as a meal?
Like:
Pizza (180) tops my list and is about the only thing I eat. Cheese pizza is about the only type I eat. Hamburger Helper is at a very distant second (~20). It's this monstrous offset that causes me to have little interest in anything else.

Dislike:
Meat (-150). There's nothing less liked than meat, any kind of meat. I haven't had a single piece of meat in about 2 years! Other things include things that look rather scary (like a pineapple or kiwi).

...I degrease my pizza sometimes, but only because too much grease is nasty.

 

[autism420]

Here is a song made by a fan for Platform Masters. It is very....unique.

 

[MACH-IV]

LOL

 

[autism420]

Some updates about Nick:

He cut all of his hair off
He is moving back home with his parents because he was replaced as care taker
and no longer has a job
Still refuses to be diagnosed with a disability, hindering his ability to get assistance
Has had ongoing diarrhea for weeks

 

[Falcon Lord]

To all those people who say "Oh, I'm so OCD": this is what real OCD looks like.

 

[Doc Cassidy]

Some updates about Nick:

He cut all of his hair off
He is moving back home with his parents because he was replaced as care taker
and no longer has a job
Still refuses to be diagnosed with a disability, hindering his ability to get assistance
Has had ongoing diarrhea for weeks

He lost his job? That sucks. He's an oddly endearing guy so I was glad he was working. I think he said it tripled his income.

 

[autism420]

He lost his job? That sucks. He's an oddly endearing guy so I was glad he was working. I think he said it tripled his income.

IIRC he was only making like $200 month, and it just got taken out of his and his sister's rent. But he has this crazy sleep schedule which he refuses to try and change, and because of that a different person was hired as care taker.

He is very stubborn and will not listen to advice willingly - recently he refused to make a Patreon page because he didn't like how the page looked. He will make mountains out of molehills and let a pebble stop him from accomplishing something.

 

[Gun Barrel City Texas]

Compared to other "Internet personalities" on this site I think ulillillia is by far the most mentally disabled. It's mind blowing how bad his ocd is

 

[Cubanodun]

oh ulli i saw his videos about Disgaea, top class seeing him breaking that damage counter to BILLIONS AND BILLIONS

 

[MarineTrainedTard]

Ulilli is great and I feel bad for him sometimes. He's interesting as fuck and genuinely seems like he's not a bad guy, just fucked up. Doesn't scream about "sluts", doesn't mace gamestop employees, doesn't have a shitty comic he thinks will make him a millionaire... just a weird dude with weird interests who doesn't really hurt anyone.

Sucks he lost his job, I wish he'd get help but meh.

 

[Guardian G.I.]

Uli used to make some really weird GIF animations with the help of his own meticulously calculated algorithms:

Spoiler

 

[Philosophy Zombie]

Ulillillia has not really been active or updated his site in years. There used to be a "Platform Masters" forum based on his game that disappeared at the end of last year.

 

[autism420]

Ulillillia has not really been active or updated his site in years. There used to be a "Platform Masters" forum based on his game that disappeared at the end of last year.

He's very active on Facebook.

 

[ATM]

It's a pity the documentary some guys filmed with him a few years back was never released. They procrastinated on it for ages and promised a digital release which never appeared. Looks like the site for it is now down.

 

[autism420]

It's a pity the documentary some guys filmed with him a few years back was never released. They procrastinated on it for ages and promised a digital release which never appeared. Looks like the site for it is now down.

Yup, fuck those guys. I tried emailing them a few months ago but it bounced back. They should at least release what they have.

 

[autism420]

Nick has successfully moved back home with his parents. They keep their house so cold that this will force him to go back to taking a shower once every 2 weeks. Because of this he will not be able to get a job. As a side note, he has some bizarre method of drying off after taking a shower which does not involve using a towel. This causes him to shiver unless his house is kept hot. If you want to read more of why showers are an issue for him click here but I can't force myself to read that ever again.

 

[autism420]