- Joined
- Apr 19, 2019
Trainwreck Virgo Rouge / Jamie Morse / Marissa Morris/Elienne/Marchant/Elene Nadieja / Rachzel Grezbian - Musician, "Culture comes out of Genetics", Gangstalking Nut, Pedo Apologist, Ever Changing Aliases.
- Thread starter BigPharma
- Start date
- Joined
- Feb 21, 2016
She's making a short video. Her landlord called her the other day, he says she owes him eight thousand dollars and he gave her a number for an assistance program. Possibly she will call them, possibly she won't. (Rental assistance line? Social services? Mental health crisis center? Whatever it is, she's acting haughty and insulted over it). She doesn't know. She's going to get a stimulus check soon, for two thousand dollars (from who? The feds aren't planning another drop and even California's last stimulus in September was only $600), she owes him money, but she really thinks things are gonna work out, with her her dad.
She loves her dad, no matter what he did to her. She's, uh, made mistakes with her life too. He's made a lot of mistakes, he's done a lot of wrong things, but he's done a lot of right things, and she loves her father, and she thinks about him, all day, every day. (Laughs) Of course she thinks about other things and other people, but, um. (Lip smack) It is very upsetting, traumatizing to say the least, and shebwishes she could take care of her dad, in New Jersey (oh boy, this fantasy again? Destitute Dar moves in and she will have money again?) If that doesn't happen, oh well.
She's having problems financially, because this kind of rent, it's, it's like a huge mortgage, and it's just too high for her, um, right at this point, in her life. She needs a little time to get situated, with her life, and she needs time to get- well, she HAS a job, in Princeton, was offered a job, but it’s too far away right now, could still probably work there... uh, (breathy laugh) piano tuning (laughs more), at this store. But it's too far away, but she lived in Central bucks County, like her dad, he has, um, he has benefits, in New Jersey, there's all kinds of benefits- she wishes they could knave the past behind- they've had all kinds of problems, but this is all, convoluted garbage, just things, that are not worth- you have to be compatible, with people, and she really believes her father, herself, are becoming more compatible.
She loves talking to him. (She loved talking at him once the dementia took hold hard) She could talk to him at length for hours, and she thought it was really, that his love for her was real, and he made a lot of mistakes, but. (Stress sigh, gets wobbly) She loves her dad. It's just terrible. Terrible, terrible, terrible feeling. But!
Maybe he doesn't really love her. Maybe everyone has narcissism, everyone is narcissistic, becomes converged upon themselves, but. Some people, are demonic (laughs). So. Anyway, she's a deeply sensitive person, and believes that God is gonna work things out, in her favor. It, may not be an easy life though, but. (Goes very soft by the end of this sentence, whispers the next) That's it, thank you.
*************************************
Ever see that episode of Hoarders with Sandra, the woman who hoarded up a 20 bedroom mansion in NorthCarolina or somewhere like that? And how she kept insisting that things were going to be fine because the banks or the courts or God himself would prevent the clean out from happening, and just as long as she could control everyone in the room the new owners would not kick her and her van out in three days' time?
She unraveled more and more as the episode went on, when her narc brain couldn't cope with the reality unfolding before her eyes.
Marissa has far less interpersonal skills than Sandra, and is saddled with paranoid / schizoid tendencies to boot. She is focused on fantasies where she can keep living exactly as she has with no consequences when she doesn't pay, or ones where she us rescued by unexpected money or Dar, or one where Dar removes himself from his memory care and comes to rescue her with his benefits and pensions and they live happily ever after as a couple. She doesn't need that help line, because everything is going to work out in her favor!
Reality is becoming a little too real for her again, and I have a feeling she will revert to total fantasy in order to avoid what's coming: a homeless winter in her car and no totems of her superior musicianship with which to feel superior with. I hope she has the good sense to call that help line - having social services step in would be the best thing for her. Her parents should have accepted that she needed a tard wrangler decades ago.
She loves her dad, no matter what he did to her. She's, uh, made mistakes with her life too. He's made a lot of mistakes, he's done a lot of wrong things, but he's done a lot of right things, and she loves her father, and she thinks about him, all day, every day. (Laughs) Of course she thinks about other things and other people, but, um. (Lip smack) It is very upsetting, traumatizing to say the least, and shebwishes she could take care of her dad, in New Jersey (oh boy, this fantasy again? Destitute Dar moves in and she will have money again?) If that doesn't happen, oh well.
She's having problems financially, because this kind of rent, it's, it's like a huge mortgage, and it's just too high for her, um, right at this point, in her life. She needs a little time to get situated, with her life, and she needs time to get- well, she HAS a job, in Princeton, was offered a job, but it’s too far away right now, could still probably work there... uh, (breathy laugh) piano tuning (laughs more), at this store. But it's too far away, but she lived in Central bucks County, like her dad, he has, um, he has benefits, in New Jersey, there's all kinds of benefits- she wishes they could knave the past behind- they've had all kinds of problems, but this is all, convoluted garbage, just things, that are not worth- you have to be compatible, with people, and she really believes her father, herself, are becoming more compatible.
She loves talking to him. (She loved talking at him once the dementia took hold hard) She could talk to him at length for hours, and she thought it was really, that his love for her was real, and he made a lot of mistakes, but. (Stress sigh, gets wobbly) She loves her dad. It's just terrible. Terrible, terrible, terrible feeling. But!
Maybe he doesn't really love her. Maybe everyone has narcissism, everyone is narcissistic, becomes converged upon themselves, but. Some people, are demonic (laughs). So. Anyway, she's a deeply sensitive person, and believes that God is gonna work things out, in her favor. It, may not be an easy life though, but. (Goes very soft by the end of this sentence, whispers the next) That's it, thank you.
*************************************
Ever see that episode of Hoarders with Sandra, the woman who hoarded up a 20 bedroom mansion in NorthCarolina or somewhere like that? And how she kept insisting that things were going to be fine because the banks or the courts or God himself would prevent the clean out from happening, and just as long as she could control everyone in the room the new owners would not kick her and her van out in three days' time?
She unraveled more and more as the episode went on, when her narc brain couldn't cope with the reality unfolding before her eyes.
Marissa has far less interpersonal skills than Sandra, and is saddled with paranoid / schizoid tendencies to boot. She is focused on fantasies where she can keep living exactly as she has with no consequences when she doesn't pay, or ones where she us rescued by unexpected money or Dar, or one where Dar removes himself from his memory care and comes to rescue her with his benefits and pensions and they live happily ever after as a couple. She doesn't need that help line, because everything is going to work out in her favor!
Reality is becoming a little too real for her again, and I have a feeling she will revert to total fantasy in order to avoid what's coming: a homeless winter in her car and no totems of her superior musicianship with which to feel superior with. I hope she has the good sense to call that help line - having social services step in would be the best thing for her. Her parents should have accepted that she needed a tard wrangler decades ago.
- Joined
- Feb 21, 2016
She just discoverd this song (reada some lyrics). She had a 3 year online relationship, with someone, claiming to be someone, she can't say who he is, he wrote her a song (reads some of the lyrics; misunderstands what "mistress" means in context.) She was never his mistress!
She talked to somebody on the internet for three years, and she contacted their son, be... cause she was angry... uh, at him, (affects an English accent), talking to her, for three years, so, playing games, so Marissa thought, felt really hurt, and... ach.
She prefers Jon Liedecker from Negativland, he's- been hurtful, but, he- he sent her two hundred dollars recently, and he's never had kids, and he's never been married, and, she's actually seen him in person, and she has more... interest in him, uh. She's not really a romantic, not in the way "you" think she is, fantasizing about people, she's more realistic. She's also romantic. But there has to be something, something in common, she's never had kids, she's never had children, never been married (puts on her sexy voice), so, uhhhh (laughs). [Does she not know that people can have sex and relationships without having kids or getting married? Does she seriously think Jon is a permavirgin like herself?]
TO BE CONTINUED
- Joined
- Feb 21, 2016
Part 2:
She can't tell anyone who she was writing online for three years, because they don't actually want anyone to know that they're alive. And, she loves them. She loves their music. Actually, she loves this song, it's beautiful, nothing wrong with the song, but, she, found it a little, weird, the description, ah- well- uh- he, in an interview said, that is was about- well, it was partially about, his... son, speaking about how he didn't look anything like his mother. Because Marissa did speak to his son- not a two way street, but she did contact his son, to notify him, that- to notify him that, his father, is... not really... committed . And also, his father, was, saying, thinking about, his, running around (voice breaks with tears), thinking about, lots of other people, and it was this whole, (?), just a bunch of phonieness, and Marissa thought is was really fake.
A lot of this, was not, real, his feelings, for Marissa, were not real, she's not real, nor anybody else, and it just seemed as if, he was really into himself- but Marissa doesn't really even know him (haughty), he's an enigma, a mystery, and she doesn't especially think about him, unless she listens to his music- but she doesn't think about him, romantically, NAH! She doesn't. And she wouldn't want to be someone's mistress.
(Wherein Marissa admits to stalking Bethann online) So also this other person, um, that put her on block on Facebook, they look SO MISERABLE, they look TERRIBLE, physically. She would say that, they look miserable, psychologically, miserable, uh, who blocked her- she's not going to mention, their name, but, she uh, actually, you're not blocking her, because, she has other accounts, all over the place, and she has an IPAD, and she can still see you- Marissa's only looked at her a couple of times- just to see what she looks like! This is someone, who, should love Marissa, who IS abusive, Marissa's father is someone she hasn't spoken to, for almost, three... years. Ah, Marissa should be able to speak to her dad, and SHE won't let her! She looks miserable, physically, she looks terrible. Her husband looks terrible, physically, and.
This Guy, who wrote this song, doesn't look terrible physically (despite having been dead since the mid 80s), because, even though he's done a lot of drugs, he really is a beautiful man. But inside, it's- NAH.
(Haughty again) He might have beauty inside, but Marissa doesn't really feel, love, for him, and- now this other person, who's been contacting Marissa for fifteen years, she never really feels, really abused, by him, she feels like he's been hurt, very deeply, he's never had any children, never gotten married, Marissa really likes his music, she feels like he's been playing games, she loves his art, she loves him, as a person, absolutely- (rapid topic switch) if he really is this guy, and he really isn't dead, she really owes this guy, whether he's alive or dead. LOVE. HIM.
[Taking a break again at 4:44, this one is taking forever because she's talking really fast throughout]
She's rapidly cycling imagining that one of the people she obsesssess over - her sister, the deceased Keith Barret, Jon Liedecker - will rescue her. But no one can ever love her enough - she needs someone's total devotion, 100% of the time, 100% of their attention, and cannot tolerate the thought that another person could have meaning in the life of the one she loves. She imagined that a guy who sends her presents (that she believes is a dead man) was talking to other women so she contacted Barrett's actual son to rant at him that his dead father was a no good two timer? Jesus.
- Joined
- Feb 21, 2016
Part 3 - the finale
She's saying she LOVES him. Not IN love, with this other person, she's not going to say the name, this person, that's what she wants people to know.
So she's, not, this is, his voice, is beautiful, his music is beautiful, he's, not really creative, it has quality, it has nuance, and sometimes the music is really creative, she's heard things from them, but, she definitely doesn't think he's not talented, though he says he's not talented, musically, Marissa thinks he is.
Um, but, like, being the mistress, that's not really something, that anyone would want, because then, if you marry someone, who, had you as a mistress, then- and she wasn't his mistress! - then, that, they would do the same thing, to you. To be with somebody else, you know, ehh... he's still married! He said he didn't want to get divorced, because, he said it had something to do with his child. That's pretty sad! That's pretty sad, but that might be a lie, too.
Some people have narcissistic personality disorder. She's not sure, if that's his problem or not. (Giant lip-smacking smack) Don't know. Definitely, don't wanna be a mistress, Marissa doesn't want to be someone's (laughs) "post-mistress", then you've got a pre-wife, and another pre-mistress, and another post-mistress, get on to the next wife... NO. No thank you.
Anyway, Marissa is just expressing herself today, not a lot of names, um. But she did find it weird! And she does regret, contacting his son, telling him that his father was, talking to Marissa for three years. It wasn't just Marissa, though, he wasn't in love with her, her was talking about, all kinds of convoluted things, that- made her upset, actually! Marissa just felt, that- it, it, really was UNCOOL, and she doesn't feel in love with him (nasty laugh), just like some of his music. (Snickers some more) And she really doesn't know him, to feel in love with him, Marissa's really not that weak a person, like "oh, I'm just falling in love with people!".
Maybe, at times. She might get weak- not lately! - it's, she's been through a lot, she's really been through a lot lately,, she can't explain it. She really has to go. Goodbye.
***********************************
Having a schizophrenic woman hound you over the imaginary relationship she believes herself to be having with your dead father must be an intense trip.
She's saying she LOVES him. Not IN love, with this other person, she's not going to say the name, this person, that's what she wants people to know.
So she's, not, this is, his voice, is beautiful, his music is beautiful, he's, not really creative, it has quality, it has nuance, and sometimes the music is really creative, she's heard things from them, but, she definitely doesn't think he's not talented, though he says he's not talented, musically, Marissa thinks he is.
Um, but, like, being the mistress, that's not really something, that anyone would want, because then, if you marry someone, who, had you as a mistress, then- and she wasn't his mistress! - then, that, they would do the same thing, to you. To be with somebody else, you know, ehh... he's still married! He said he didn't want to get divorced, because, he said it had something to do with his child. That's pretty sad! That's pretty sad, but that might be a lie, too.
Some people have narcissistic personality disorder. She's not sure, if that's his problem or not. (Giant lip-smacking smack) Don't know. Definitely, don't wanna be a mistress, Marissa doesn't want to be someone's (laughs) "post-mistress", then you've got a pre-wife, and another pre-mistress, and another post-mistress, get on to the next wife... NO. No thank you.
Anyway, Marissa is just expressing herself today, not a lot of names, um. But she did find it weird! And she does regret, contacting his son, telling him that his father was, talking to Marissa for three years. It wasn't just Marissa, though, he wasn't in love with her, her was talking about, all kinds of convoluted things, that- made her upset, actually! Marissa just felt, that- it, it, really was UNCOOL, and she doesn't feel in love with him (nasty laugh), just like some of his music. (Snickers some more) And she really doesn't know him, to feel in love with him, Marissa's really not that weak a person, like "oh, I'm just falling in love with people!".
Maybe, at times. She might get weak- not lately! - it's, she's been through a lot, she's really been through a lot lately,, she can't explain it. She really has to go. Goodbye.
***********************************
Having a schizophrenic woman hound you over the imaginary relationship she believes herself to be having with your dead father must be an intense trip.
- Joined
- Jun 17, 2014
She desperately needs to be focusing on acquiring at the very least storage for her items, and looking for a small apartment that she can actually afford. But what is she doing? Mooning about imaginary boyfriends and stalking her sisters Facebook. And making videos about it of course. Anything to take focus off the fact that she won't be able to give uber rides in a car packed everything but the piano and the bongos.
- Joined
- Feb 25, 2015
So she is in that delete/hide/restore mode with her vids it seems. Again.
I just looked at her channel, and all her recent eviction/rant videos are gone. The only one there is this from 11 hours ago, oddly not here in the thread. Did she private it shortly after uploading and no one saw it to grab it?
I'm Deeply In Love With, Comfortable With, Convinced Of Our Love, He's Never Been Married Either
I just looked at her channel, and all her recent eviction/rant videos are gone. The only one there is this from 11 hours ago, oddly not here in the thread. Did she private it shortly after uploading and no one saw it to grab it?
I'm Deeply In Love With, Comfortable With, Convinced Of Our Love, He's Never Been Married Either
DumbDude42
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Sep 12, 2019
i wonder if she is just making up random shit to talk about of if she is actually talking to someone
- Joined
- Feb 25, 2015
Yeah, it's a good point for either or really. She's quite insane so I can see her making it up as a way of coping with having no one in her life, but on other hand, she did receive stuff in mail and people have sent her money, so I assume she is being fucked with in some way, and the slim chance that someone actually takes pity on her or likes her as a slight possibility.
Unless someone comes to the Farms and drops some content of their interactions with Marisa, we won't know for sure. And who knows how many may be in contact with her.
- Joined
- Jan 27, 2021
Kelly Lenza, the empathic nutritionist or Jill, most cows are entertaining, even in their insufferability. But these three? They make me so MATI. Kelly would tell you everything you own belongs to natives and expect you to babysit her kids for free, the empathic nutritionist would shove her potato at you and expect you to telepathically speak to her brain dead child, and Jilly bean would re-do your house to be properly godly. Then again, Jill would be more entertaining since she would make her kids play god awful music on cow bells.
- Joined
- May 17, 2017
I'm a newbie to this whole fabulous nutcase buf I get the impression that "off the grid" has a slightly different meaning here. She's improving OTG so now it means from the comfort of a large NYC house with utilities and all mod cons but off-paying-for-it and off-maintaining it. Surely there's some peasant that can deal with such mundane fripperies; Marissa is here to Create.
Do we know what state the house is in? The only vids I've seen are all from her studio/music room/Guantanamo Aural Torture HQ and that looks fairly together but I'd be surprised if part or the rest of the house wasn't utter chaos. She's pretty florid and disorganised so do we know if that's echoed in her surroundings? Is she going to waft into the distance muttering, only for the landlord to find she's dug up Syd and is using his corpse as a coffee-table-stroke-conversational-art-piece? Somehow, Marissa and good housekeeping don't seem to sit well together. Can't think why...
- Joined
- Jun 17, 2014
Oddly, every part of the apartment we have seen has always been very neat, bright and tidy, almost sparse. The room where she keeps her instruments is a little tightly packed, but still bright, and organized. We have never seen her bedroom though. All videos made there are made either under blankets or with the lights off, so who knows?I'm a newbie to this whole fabulous nutcase buf I get the impression that "off the grid" has a slightly different meaning here. She's improving OTG so now it means from the comfort of a large NYC house with utilities and all mod cons but off-paying-for-it and off-maintaining it. Surely there's some peasant that can deal with such mundane fripperies; Marissa is here to Create.
Do we know what state the house is in? The only vids I've seen are all from her studio/music room/Guantanamo Aural Torture HQ and that looks fairly together but I'd be surprised if part or the rest of the house wasn't utter chaos. She's pretty florid and disorganised so do we know if that's echoed in her surroundings? Is she going to waft into the distance muttering, only for the landlord to find she's dug up Syd and is using his corpse as a coffee-table-stroke-conversational-art-piece? Somehow, Marissa and good housekeeping don't seem to sit well together. Can't think why...
- Joined
- May 17, 2017
That is...well, I dunno enough about mentals to know how unusual it is, but it's certainly unexpected. In my limited experience even very disorganised loonies may keep the object of their obsession pristine but everywhere else is a disaster so I kinda assumed that the rest of the gaff followed the Shanny housekeeping model.
Dammit. Now I want to see her kitchen nearly as much as I want to see Albert's laaaygs.
Dammit. Now I want to see her kitchen nearly as much as I want to see Albert's laaaygs.
- Joined
- Feb 21, 2016
She seems to have a touch of obsession about cleanliness, to the point that she accused her father's memory care home of allowing him to wallow in trash because there was a folded reusable bag propped against the dining area wall.
And agreed, normally someone as mentally ill - and grandiose - as Marissa would see cleaning as something beneath them or not something they're able to be focused on.
Her house is sparsely filled but neat as a pin. It's not like she ever has company, and she has no family so it's not like it's liable to get messed up. But she does have the wherewithal and drive to keep it swept / dusted / neat, shockingly.
- Joined
- Feb 9, 2018
I'll accept my autistic ratings for this. I casually asked a co-worker about people in Marissa's situation because, while this is entirely deserved, I do feel the slightly smidge of pity for any one homeless with mental illness (except for Wern) He said, a best case scenario is some type of women's shelter where they will try to get her a caseworker who will file and advocate on her behalf for ssi. then ideally, use those funds and medicaid to get her into some assisted living/group home (even some shitty nursing homes take those types though its definitely not ideal). The problem is the extensive wait list for any type of help, particularly in the winter, and that Marissa will be antagonistic so they're not going to push help on her.
She really should take this seriously and start calling those resources her landlord gave her.
She really should take this seriously and start calling those resources her landlord gave her.
Last edited:
- Joined
- May 17, 2017
Don't worry. Mine's messy enough for all of us
- Joined
- Feb 21, 2016
Yeah, Marissa can and should have had a caseworker assigned to her since she reached adulthood, but she's non-compliant. To have been sent to a group home (she calls it "foster care") from the age of 18 to age 22, she must have gotten a serious diagnosis, enough so that she wasn't considered capable of independent living and too dangerous to remain in her parents' home. After she left group care at age 22 - and after trying and failing to be allowed to stay with her parents forever - she has been off the government radar. Marissa's gone without any sort of treatment for her florid mental illness for more than 30 years, and the chances she would comply with treatment in order to get government housing and support are miniscule.
I'd like to see if happen just because Marissa dealing with her fellow loons in a group home setting would produce gallons of milk to laugh at - she'd fight with and attempt to manipulate everyone, nothing would be high class enough for her, she'd drone on at the caseworkers for hours, trying to wear them down - but frankly I see her freezing to death in her car with only a raw beef liver for company.