vlog | target plus size try on haul, chic fil a kale salad taste test, & closet tour 10/1/2020 -

Salade Nicoise

A healthy French lunch.
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
I realise she's a manic, narcissistic, shopping addicted, food addict dumb bitch who thinks hauls are 'so kyuute kwality kahntent'...

But I have never in my life encountered someone who 'needs to go to the grocery store' as much as this tub tub. Like the jokes write themselves at this point. Twice a week at the most. That's what you're allowed, Fatty.

And like if it were the whole 'small town European' thing (shopping for very little, fresh produce, every day or so), I'd maybe understand (she is Portuguese after all).... but it's a fucking weekly shop every time. The consumption of this idiot makes me sick, in every way.
 

Captain Ahab

kiwifarms.net
Very few people can pull off animal prints without making it look trashy. She’s not one of them. The higher the weight and the lighter the skin, the less likely you are to look good in animal prints. It works mostly for darker skin people and tall, super skinny Saint Laurent models. When the print becomes stretched and distorted, it accentuates your weight even more and looks terrible.

Why would you do that to yourself?
 

MeowMixMeowMix

kiwifarms.net
Amber has never EVER paid separately from Becky before nor has she ever had this imaginary “budget”. This is a prime example of why people hate her and are so frustrated watching her... Or at least why I am!!!! She comes up with a new idea or way to do something and acts like she has been doing this her whole life. Then, when she inevitably stops doing said thing or forgets about her new idea, people ask her about it and she plays dumb. Perfect example of why she’s “GaslightLynn”. I just can’t tell if she does this on purpose or if she’s just so delusional that she doesn’t see what she’s doing. It’s hard to tell if she’s trolling or if the trauma in her past has caused her to make up these KUUUTE AND KWERKY personality traits or supposed daily rituals and she really believes her lies/ delusions in that moment.
Also, the whole wearing clothes in order from the closet is a new super quirky trait too. It’s absolutely something her 10 year old brain made up and she’ll forget next week.

Oh and thank u so much, Hamber, for the advice that I can eat out and be mindful about what I am eating. You are truly inspiring. Never mind the ramen and the 500 meals since you moved where you gorged yourself on unhealthy food, unnecessary appetizer, fried entrees and desserts. This one meal makes up for all of that, fo sure! SO INSPIRATIONAL 💕💕
 

Xenomorph

I pulled off your wings, and I laughed.
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Amber: How was your day?
Becky: Pretty low key, except for doing dishes.


I autistically tried to count the hangers in use.
63 shirts
88 dresses
then I gave up.


Does she understand that she has to adjust her bra straps? I don't think so.
Wow Beggy you had to do the dishes omg did you need to lay down after?

Fucking sped.

@Squid Bitch she meant a mammoth skeleton.
 

escándalo

kiwifarms.net
So as some of us here especially the seasoned watchers have noted she has NEVER said about separate incomes etc regarding Becky, she did with Destiny as Destiny worked but not with Becky. Unusual feels like she is reading here more than usual since the last week Becky's dependence on her has been a talking point.

As for these vlogs fuck cannot wait til feeder saga its coming soon and I cannot wait. She is going to do it to attract the haydurs back but a lot have been deplatformed. I think the only 3 who can return and get money is MBP, Zack and Aphrodite Peach (her recaps are still very good and her disavowing of CG worked well.)

its literally ground hog day on steriods.
 

TC-P

kiwifarms.net
-i like that shes changing things up this time by doing a haul
-she definitely showers at night (as her hair festers in its bun)
-its so quirky and cute that she sleeps till the afternoon every day
-we get a closet tour, and like all good vloggers she didnt bother to clean or straighten anything first, showing us unfolded piles of the tarps she wears
-she has two drawers full of pants she def doesnt just only wear the two
-she has to wear her clothes on a first in first out basis like rotating freezer stock at the local burger king. its sooooo werid and yoonique
-shes trying to pretend shes ocd or something idk shes an idiot
-she has a bunch of knock off purses thrown on the shelves
-now we get to beckys segment, a newly introduced but welcome change to this season. the lights are blown in the kitchen and they're too fat to stand on a chair and change it so its just gonna be dark i guess
-becky is making a lovely taco salad featuring.....ground beef. i know i was shocked too
-we went from a recipe to a haul or something
-becky NEVER eats ramen cuz her neglectful parents raised them on it or something idk, she can remember the exact year she stopped eating it
-they still dont know how to frame shots after all these years
-fucking lul, right after becky says shes making taco salad it cuts to alr saying she got chic fil a. moving to the city was the worst thing she ever did.
-she got a kale salad shes NEVER had it before (except maybe she did cuz she cant remember all the shit she shovels down her throat)
-its not a mukbang its a TASTE TEST
-"idk why everyone complains i say im nervous to try food OTHER PEOPLE SAY IT TOO" whatever you fucking cow. quit trying to act like some delicate waif too nervous to try to eat something, we have eyes
-the kale smells familiar whatever that fucking means
-shes doing that weird face and "hmm" she makes when she doesnt really like something but is gonna eat it anyway.
-"you can eat out and be mindful of what youre choosing" yeah bitch but YOU cant and have proven it more than one
-"for the win" you are 30
-"its raining and im under an umbrella" fucking riveting
-more of that "staring up into her 6th chin" camera angle she loves so much
-the puddles tremble as she walks by like that scene in jurassic park
-becky already went to wommart cuz she didnt know alr was gonna force her to take her grocery shopping again
-she kept that nasty old bra
-becky shows us some art that looks like something from a 60s coloring book she traced
-at least she has a hobby. too bad shes mentally stuck back in '94
-dont start fucking singing ugh one mooing cow in the farm is enough
-new day, and theyre going....shopping. again. she casually mentions picking up prescriptions for becky
-shes still doing that book club
-she starts to describe the book and theres a hard cut to her just reading the back of the book to us instead because she isnt even smart enough to describe basic plot. it sounds 'good'
-at the store in scooty MUST TOUCH EVERYTHING
-of course shes obsessed with nightmare before christmas
-they pay separately all of a sudden cuz they 'budget' bitch where
-she got some headbands because her hair needed more stress
-she got some tablecloths that are supposedly sweaters
-the shirts are 4x and are barely managing to fit over her gunt. like if she moves too much (rare, i know) the whole thing is gonna roll up under her armpits
-for dinner she...ordered out. she got ramen (its REAL ramen) and its sooooo filleeng shes def not gonna order something else
-actually she probably will lmao cuz she hated the ramen she got
-eating at a restaurant during corona freaks her out but she just touched everything she could get her greasy paws on at target so go off i guess
-"i cant force myself to eat something i truly dislike" LMAO okay janberlyn since when? pizza anyone?
-curvy comment time
-someone calling her out for being smug and killing herself and she cant even come up with a response besides saying its true so whatever.
-shes gonna shop till she drops...dead of a heart attack

Thank you so much for doing the highlights so I do not have to watch. Plus you make me laugh.
 

AmberAlert

kiwifarms.net
okie so is it true that anything she showcases in her vlogs, she can write off on her taxes since it’s technically used for her “job”? This would help make it all make sense.
I've been wondering this too. I have seen content creators talk about being able to write off things like makeup purchases used in makeup tutorials as a business expense. Wonder if she's thinking that as long as it's featured in a vlog it counts as a business expense.
 

FatalTater

Fattest Among Thousands, Altogether Lethargic
kiwifarms.net
What is going on with the microwave's clock in Becky's little grocery haul toward the beginning? It seems to be having a crisis.
That purple thing she's wearing while being a lesbian eating Chik-Fil-A food looks like something a grandma would wear.
The try-on segment showing off all the skin-tight stuff was 100% for the chubby chasers.
 

Your_Fairy_Wish_Prince

I am your Fairy Wish Prince, at your service
kiwifarms.net
Oh my, where do I start:

Becky's Ramen: Let's be honest, ramen in any form really isn't that healthy, especially the kind where the noodles are fried. (I thinks its amusing that out of the two of them Becky is the better vlogger) However, you can make an alternative that is far more healthy. Instead of instant ramen, she could use Pho Noodle soup, the noodles are gluten free, aren't fried and made of rice. When I do eat it I usually incorporate a cup or two of stir fry vegetables either fresh or frozen, bamboo shoots and a raw egg for protein. All in all about 350-ish calories.

Amber- yes you can be mindful when you are eating out. But the hard truth is most take out food is garbage even the foods that look healthy tend to be loaded with salt, sugar and preservatives. Eating out should be considered a treat or a reward something that should happen at most twice a week and even that is pushing it. I may be in the minority here but the only time my family ever went out to eat was either a special occasion or Sunday lunch. I am betting Amber eats take out food every day and for more than one year. Amber, its strange that you get nervous when confronted with NORMAL food. Every time you try something "new" its like someone is confronting you with a skull full of monkey brains and a plate of goat eyes.

Passive aggressive as fuck about pillows in the back seat (I am sorry if my partner took that tone with me there would be a Jerry Springer moment in that car) but totally cool with a 6k bed spilling over with trash like a skiff sailing down The Hudson. Ok gorl.

Amber, wearing a bra isn't as complicated as you are making it, its not astrophysics.

Becky....seriously no Lock, Shock and Barrel? if she wanted to be ""creative"" she should draw trace Huey, Dewey and Louie as Lock Shock and Barrel just saying. :)

The singing, why? It seems like she doesn't know how to segue into another scene so she sings and acts random like a 3rd grader because that the only that she knows how to present herself.
View attachment 1634181

Got those Pennywise eyes.....

The reading list....none of that shit sounds interesting to me but I am super picky about literature (guess we have already thrown away the Dean Koontz novel), lol can you imagine Amber reading something by Irvine Welsh, I mean it should be right up her alley since its about festering drug addicts.

I have NEVER seen someone buy so many unnecessary cloths in my entire life. But I guess you have to buy new shit every year when you are constantly sizing up out of cloths that you bought the previous year. I don't know, I could just be thinking like a penny pinching Jew but seriously where do all these cloths go?

Eating at restaurants freaks her out but dragging her FUPA all over Walmart and Target is fine.

We all know she slopped that ramen down when the camera was turned off.

edit: grammar
 
Last edited:

Pippeyy

kiwifarms.net
The reality check of thinking she’s a skinny legend who can shop at “normal” stores for clothes and not having a single item even come close to fitting, almost sunk in. She almost had some self awareness but then immediately switched to her favorite fantasy of wearing those items next winter.
It hasn’t even been a year since her “honest torrid haul” and all those dresses and sweaters that were totally going to fit her this winter.
 

Very Honest Content

(Formerly a) Niggo(?)
kiwifarms.net
Haul videos are the absolute worst, thank you recap posters, you have my prayers for your sanity and vision to remain intact despite the horror that awaits each one of you inside each one of these!

I got stuck in watching AL waste her life ...
Becky is a very sad case. She was manipulated into being a servant...

Becky pursued Amber, so, no.
 

Att1cusF1nch

kiwifarms.net
“Definitely goes with my theme”....you can say that again Pal!
 

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