one-man polycule
mrw I see a fuckin' chemtrail formeen



Same old shit? I though AL was acting MANIC in this one. Her screeching over Becky was worse than normal, especially when she was trying to say "that's totally MEEEEEEEEEE" as Becky described what she wore over her emo stage.

I usually don't finish these longass boring sit down videos to be honest. She's probably acting like a condescending ass to Becky and I'm betting she either gained or lost like a pound. shrug


A housewife!
"I don't snack when I'm trying to lose weight, I tend to just eat meals.-"

"-8 large portioned meals a day,"

I should have listened further, they talk about what they'd wear to the beach if they weight 135 pounds and I laughed.
Amber sees chem trails forming and thinks they're going to make it storm in a few days.
She promises to count ALL her calories for the next hundred days (Yeah, okay gorl)
"That chem trail is freakin' me oooout!"
She's gone 3,000 calories over what my fitness pal recommends (2,700) but says 2,700 is too many and she will gain weight, so she's shooting for 1,800. HAHAHAHAHA!
She's hitting about 4,000 a day she thinks.
Becky lost 2.6 pounds (she took a shit before the weigh-in basically)
Big AL's weight is holding around 492 for now, gotta get more calories to hit 500, gorl.
She starts out the day "great" (read: asleep) and then in the evening (when she's awake) she binges.
Becky doesn't know how to count calories because putting a recipe in the fitness app is too complicated but AL will help because she's been doing it "for so long" (even though at the beginning of the video she said she's never done it before, how can you not keep your lies straight within a ten minute span?)
AL wants to use antibiotics as an anti-depression because they're great for Becky's mood.
They're getting back on track and promise to go to the gym. Big AL is going for a walk by herself but who's going to roll her out of the ditch if she falls?

No comment callout, I'm pleasantly surprised.
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plant boy

HW:500.6 CW:500.6 LW:330 GW:199
Imagine every time you tried to talk about yourself, a 500 lb toddler not only interrupted you but also found a way to make it about herself. Your experiences, your accomplishments, your goals and even your illnesses. You can see when Becky gets interupted, she just resigns and lets AL spiel. There’s no stopping the freight train of ass-pattery that is Amber Lynn.

Poor necks. :’(

Optimus Prime

Resident KF Transformers Expert
I don't know if Hamber would be pleased or scared if she was actually losing weight. After all, as has been mentioned before, she should be melting pounds away - both her and becky - if she was making any attempt to do so. It's beyond their capability to maintain, but fuck I'd love to see these two attempt the infamous first two weeks of the Atkins diet where you can't have more than 25 carbs daily. I suspect there is a non-zero chance Hamber would die of hunger.

Additionally, if they were losing weight, then eventually they'd need new clothes because XXXXXXXXL sizes won't fit on slightly less fat people. Which would in turn be a self-sustaining cycle of panic because what, these two live on social security or something (only recently started tracking this cow so I'm not fully in tune with how they are able to sustain this lifestyle) and that means burning money on clothes even at goodwill prices. Which means less money for food. Which means less to eat. Which means dieting through starvation which means more weight loss, etc.

I don't think becoming healthier would be something they could process.

How someone can say i lost .6 lbs and be proud of it amazes me.

Given Hamber isn't exactly a genuis when it comes to education, the fact she can subtract 0.6 from a number and it's smaller means she's lost some weight. An extremely small and insignificant amount, but it just shows how she doesn't understand weight itself is only tracked through time and not an instantaeous thing.

Hell, clothes often weigh more than you may think - as much as I appologize for the mental image this creates, if Amber stepped on a scale, noted the number, then got off the scale and stripped naked (for my own mental stability I instead replace her naked blight upon this Earth with an image of a miniaturized Mr. Stay Puft monster), then got back on the scale, the number would be lower. Knowing Amber though, she'd call that even MORE weight loss.

Neither of them lost shit.

No, of course they lost shit - they're still human and need to go to the bathroom.

The problem is that they're both still full of shit.

So she weighed herself after a shit.

Most likely - she's in the bathroom already so might as well kill two birds with one stone. I don't think she even understands how taking a dump actually does reduce body weight, even at a proportion of her mass.

Verbatim Goalz Gorl

Healthy Just Big
I can't believe she still pretends to "know what she's do-eeen" when it comes to weight loss, when she's 492 at 27 years old. I started cracking up when she said 2,700 calories is too much for her, oh but also she's been overeating everyday by 3,000 calories. LOL GURL YOU KNOW WHAT YOU DOIN

The chemtrails thing is hilarious - of course Amber believes in them. Makes me want to hop on a chemtrail machine, fly down to Kentucky and slap the dumb out of her.


I pulled off your wings, and I laughed.
True & Honest Fan
So she took a shit then weighed herself.

Thats nothing.. bitch stays eating that 5000 kcal per day.

Also, can someone tell Becky that she was not a 90's kid and that look of "I went to Woodstock 98 and listen to Fred Durst" is not cute