What ACK?: Gout Edition - "What If" but for DSP & Company

Feline Darkmage

Gamer Gril Queen
True & Honest Fan
Retired Staff
It's a staple of lolcows with their own subforums to get a thread like this, dating all the way back to the ancient "What If?" thread in the Chris-Chan board (and the defunct "What If" CWC subforum)

For example:
What if Phil lost his leg to the gout n beetus? (He's fat)

What if Fuchs never founded the Sons of Kojima?

What if Phil got a new girlfriend?