Containment What If? -

CatParty

Boo
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
GrandNumberOfPounds said:
His DIRTY CRAPPED BRIEFS wouldn't smell so bad anymore.

Yes, I've heard vegans actually brag that their crap doesn't smell as bad as meat eaters'.



[youtube]YsowLJU1GGM[/youtube]
 

Surtur

Destroyer of the Universe.
Retired Staff
kiwifarms.net
DykesDykesChina said:
The only way Chris would bother writing letters would be if it was in fact a pen galpal.

Then he would constantly talk about hankypanky, marriage and Crystal. The poor lady would get the impression that Americans are 1.) not exactly bright, 2.) obsessed about hankypanky, marriage and god-promised children, 3.) if not talking about these subjects, then most likely about children's cartoon characters and vidya.

So her impressions would accurate.
 

Null

Ooperator
kiwifarms.net
I've been thinking about this since I took over technical administration for the forum.

What would we do if Chris just.. joined the forums? One day, you look down and see: "Our newest member: Christian Weston Chandler" No games, no silly aliases. Just, "y'all should know me by now, but if ya don't..."

From his point of view, I think he'd begin to defend himself and his family/friends whenever possible. He'd probably only post once or twice a week because of the stress induced by living in the Lion's Den, but it would be interesting.

From my point of view, I'd need to enact some sort of very strict administrative policy. Any sort of a-logging or "julay" bullshit would be an immediate suspension. I'd have to restrict Chris' PM abilities and replace them with a forum that existed solely to facilitate discussion between Admins and Chris. I would not want him having any private correspondence with any one member of the forum.

But then what? That'd just be the logistics. Say Chris comes in and he actually acts cool. He'd give bullshit excuses, but no rage. No flames. No weird gimmicky southern-hick/retard cwcisms. He just posted and was like, "Yeah I was going to train, say my prayers, and eat my vitamins, but da stwess ..." -- I can almost imagine the forums dying of Chris just popped in one day, faced everyone, and was chill.
 

Grand Number of Pounds

Sonichu fan
kiwifarms.net
I remember CWC was on the forum that got TOS'd under the name lumberingjack but got julaayed and banned shortly after it was revealed who he was.

Just curious, why do you think he would be chill? Unless he got on some pretty serious meds, being chill in the face of criticism flies in the face of everything we know about him.
 

Null

Ooperator
kiwifarms.net
He wouldn't be. Chances are that it would be impossible to really save Chris from himself. There would be an initial attempt to protect him from verbal abuse but as he grew more comfortable with shit-slinging it would be unpreventable.
 

spaps

I'LL FUCK YOU OFF AT NO COST
kiwifarms.net
If so, Alec Benson Leary would have to come back. Then the fun would begin.
 

Something Vague

Keurig Connoisseur
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
He'd probably lurk since he has been kind of paranoid lately, but when he gains that boost of confidence, oh boy he'll try to make a comeback.

People probably would find it hard to believe that it is actually him.
 

Niachu

Retired Staff
kiwifarms.net
GrandNumberOfPounds said:
His DIRTY CRAPPED BRIEFS wouldn't smell so bad anymore.

Yes, I've heard vegans actually brag that their crap doesn't smell as bad as meat eaters'.

Really? I've heard they smell worse. :? That's a scary thought.

He'd probably try to argue in favor of his character and to disregard all the nasty online stuff. For all the good that'd do.
 

The Hunter

Border Hopping Taco Bender
Retired Staff
kiwifarms.net
Niachu said:
GrandNumberOfPounds said:
His DIRTY CRAPPED BRIEFS wouldn't smell so bad anymore.

Yes, I've heard vegans actually brag that their crap doesn't smell as bad as meat eaters'.

Really? I've heard they smell worse. :? That's a scary thought.
I wrote a paper on the negative effects of strict veganism on the body. A diet consisting of only meat will make it smell bad and will loosen the bowels causing incontinence, but one lacking meat will make it smell just as bad, but without the embarrassment of having frequent accidents. That's what I hear, anyways, and it wasn't a really well researched paper. Just one I wrote for a first year English class at a university during a dual enrollment program. Although my professor said the references were valid and trustworthy.

But in the end, crap smells like crap. Who cares how bad it smells? It's still crap.
 

Surtur

Destroyer of the Universe.
Retired Staff
kiwifarms.net
Niachu said:
For extra fun: What if Chris adopted nudism from his parents?

That classic photo of Snorlax Barb would be ten times more horrific.
 

CatParty

Boo
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Surtur said:
Niachu said:
For extra fun: What if Chris adopted nudism from his parents?

That classic photo of Snorlax Barb would be ten times more horrific.



tumblr_lw66qd48nb1r6mr02o1_500.gif
 

Xanatos

kiwifarms.net
For starters, it's pretty obvious that, instead of yelling RAMOOOOOOOOONE, Steve from Yellowstone would yell JULAAAAAAAAAAY!

LINGER LONGER!
 

DykesDykesChina

Human/Science
Deceased
kiwifarms.net
GrandNumberOfPounds said:
Does he even like sports?
Of course he does! He's very athletic: He plays guitar hero! You have to stand up to play it, giving you manual dexterity as well as elbow-greased strength.
 

Xanatos

kiwifarms.net
"We will kill the manchild Christian. We will chop him. We will grind him. We will bathe in his blood! I myself will kill the fool, Sonichu. I will rip the meat from his bones and suck them dry!

Don't call us a gang. Don't call us trollingstupids. We are the law. CWCville belongs to the Jerkops!"
 

Kosher Dill

Potato Chips
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
He'd try to play sports as seen on cartoons. In basketball he'd try to break out and dunk every time, in football he'd put his arm forward and run straight ahead hoping to "deflect" the opposing players, etc.
 

José Mourinho

The Special One
Global Moderator
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
He would give up playing any sport after a few minutes.

If he played for any football club, he would be substituted after a few minutes of playing because he would be too tired.
 
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