What is Your favorite Chris quote? - Post your favorite Chris quote here

troon patrol

Nazi Ghost of Scott Weiland
kiwifarms.net
Can I pick two?

He's on the phone with Alec, whining about how he has no time to work on sonichu because of all the cleaning around the house he does, Alec replies: "chris, you kind of sound like you're talking to someone who hasn't seen that video of your house." Chris responds by randomly mashing buttons on his phone and pretending the phone line is having technical issues.

I am and not Ian Brandon something! The look on his face afterwards makes pretty clear he just shit himself.
 

Jasonfan89

Ki ki ki ma ma ma
kiwifarms.net
had something done to me that is Radical, that I did for my Lesbian Soul! I got a new piercing on my taint on Monday the 15th. About where my clitoris would be if I was a woman! It is a short, steel straight piece with steel spheres, of which I refer to them as my un-clit. I am tending to its cleaning personally in Daily Baths or Showers, as well as cleaning the area with rubbing alcohol twice daily.

I, Christian Weston Chandler, with no other outside opinions from anyone, have long been thinking about getting a piercing on my taint, with a steel sphere where my clitoris would be if I was born female, in my Soul identity as a Female and a Leabian, as a fair substitute for that, and to stimulate the woman's clitoris via scissoring, YEARS ago after watching the Lesbian couple Tribbing each other in the soft core porn movie, "The Key to Sex".

And for those who don't know about Tribbing, it is more commonly known as Scissoring, Tribadism is when one woman rubs her vulva against the other woman's vulva, to stimulate each other's clitoris. In fact, there are clits that actually stick out, penetrating the labia and better stimulating the other clitoris. The female bonobo monkeys have long clits, and they trib other female bonobos a LOT of the time.

And to make sure EVERYONE UNDERSTANDS ONCE AND FOR ALL: I am a FEMALE, LESBIAN SOUL TRAPPED IN A MALE BODY. Or to put it another way, I am a LESBIAN TRANSGENDER! I am Seriously Into Women! Males Offend Me, even my own PenisTotally Grosses Me Out! I am glad that I tuck it underneath my taint, so I do not have to look down at the Ugly Bulge!

I HAVE Come Out as the Lesbian Transgender that I Always Have Been and Ever Will! And for everyone of you Sods who continue to mislabel me as a Homosexual Male, or hint towards anything of that even in distasteful jest, you all can kiss My Vagina Of My Soul!!!
Every about this just I can't even...The worst part has to be his comparison to bonobo monkeys to justify himself. Ok just because humans are marginally related to primates on the DNA scale doesn't mean we should be like them and use them as an example to live. It reminds me of troons trying to justify being gender fluid or whatever by bringing up hermaphrodites in nature like snails or frogs that change sex from male to female on a single sex environment...yes you saw Jurassic Park so did everyone in the 90s
 

troon patrol

Nazi Ghost of Scott Weiland
kiwifarms.net
Every about this just I can't even...The worst part has to be his comparison to bonobo monkeys to justify himself. Ok just because humans are marginally related to primates on the DNA scale doesn't mean we should be like them and use them as an example to live. It reminds me of troons trying to justify being gender fluid or whatever by bringing up hermaphrodites in nature like snails or frogs that change sex from male to female on a single sex environment...yes you saw Jurassic Park so did everyone in the 90s

My favorite part of the septic taint story, is that is chris didn't understand the clit is above the vagina not below.
 

troon patrol

Nazi Ghost of Scott Weiland
kiwifarms.net
I guess Mia Hamm would only sleep with him for a fuck load of money and with the lights off, and despite his recollection of the story he didn't get a hands on anatomy lesson before they got down to it.
Yeah she didn't let his fingers near her twat and that's chris's side of the story. The real life event probably went something like Hooker:" OUCH! stop that, don't know wtf your doing, do you?" Chris: "I DO! I WATCH SO MUCH PORN! I''VE PREPARED FOR THIS MY WHOLE LIFE!" followed by some light crying and pouting.

Thought of the greasy unwashed chris with untrimmed nails jamming his fingers in a cunt for rent.
🤮
 

Jasonfan89

Ki ki ki ma ma ma
kiwifarms.net
Yeah she didn't let his fingers near her twat and that's chris's side of the story. The real life event probably went something like Hooker:" OUCH! stop that, don't know wtf your doing, do you?" Chris: "I DO! I WATCH SO MUCH PORN! I''VE PREPARED FOR THIS MY WHOLE LIFE!" followed by some light crying and pouting.

Thought of the greasy unwashed chris with untrimmed nails jamming his fingers in a cunt for rent.
🤮
Oh yeah no wonder she quit the oldest profession especially when it dawned on her that there where probably more desperate losers like Chris in the world and couldn't take it. Hopefully she's founda decent job, because even working the register at Target is more dignifed than sleeping with man babies like Chris for rent.


Also to keep in with this thread

"Never mess with a frustrated Virgin when he's on a quest to find a girlfriend to share true love and trust with!"
 

Fapcop

kiwifarms.net
"You are the impostor! Stop - that - brown - striped - in - the... shirt... with the paper medallion! Stop that impostor!"
Lolol! Don’t forget the phonecall where Chris rushed to his parents at one o clock at night because “It’s the brown striped-imposter in the brown striped shirt!”

One of my favorites will always be: “God dang asexual woman!” Because the background story is so 100% Chris. (Chris tries to get China, screws it up, blames trolls and owner of the China in question.)
 
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