What will happen when Amber dies? - It‘s like the Barb Thread but with Amber

What will become of CadaverLynn?

  • Cremation, local zoo incinerator

    Votes: 139 32.9%
  • Burial, piano box

    Votes: 76 18.0%
  • Science, largest-ever donation to Body Farm

    Votes: 75 17.8%
  • Controlled explosion of her carcass on the shores of Toxic Shock Lake

    Votes: 132 31.3%

  • Total voters
    422

HomerSimpson

All beer and no TV make homer something something
kiwifarms.net
Would the people in charge of her body after her death have a public funeral or private one for verified people?

If they do private, not enough people would show up to make it worth the money.

If it were open to the public, I can guarantee you that some spergs would go and do weird shit.
Could live stream with superchats enabled and text to speech going.
 

Moonpie

Ride the Lightening
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Would the people in charge of her body after her death have a public funeral or private one for verified people?

If they do private, not enough people would show up to make it worth the money.

If it were open to the public, I can guarantee you that some spergs would go and do weird shit.
Her mother and family would have to decide that.
Can you imagine if they had the funeral? The super large casket.
Where will she be buried?
The old gorl better be thinking of this shit.
 

DavieJones714

i read it for the articles
kiwifarms.net
Her ashes might fit in this. She could probably get a pink one. Erik and Rikki will keep her by the tree. Twinkie will literally piss on her grave. and Becky, who?

urn.jpg
 

TransNig

Xie/Xer
kiwifarms.net
The super large casket.
I would be so humiliated if I knew that I required a small camper-van to carry me to my final resting place.
unnamed.jpg

There have probably been a lot of cruise-ship-coffin pics posted in this thread already, but I get a chuckle out of these. It's funny to see how much wider it is than it is tall. Do the super morbidly obese kind of flatten out like a beached jellyfish when they die?
Annotation 2020-07-06 133002.png

The old gorl better be thinking of this shit.
Why? May as well give her enablers one final hurdle from beyond the grave.
 

Situation Type Deal Gorl

Fuck your feelings, nancypants
kiwifarms.net
I would be so humiliated if I knew that I required a small camper-van to carry me to my final resting place.

There have probably been a lot of cruise-ship-coffin pics posted in this thread already, but I get a chuckle out of these. It's funny to see how much wider it is than it is tall. Do the super morbidly obese kind of flatten out like a beached jellyfish when they die?
View attachment 1430830

It still baffles me that these uberfats have partners and/or spouses they met/married when they were already on their way to becoming small planets. Why the hell would you marry someone who weighed a thousand pounds?
 

krazy orange cat

Fluffy ball of evil
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
It still baffles me that these uberfats have partners and/or spouses they met/married when they were already on their way to becoming small planets. Why the hell would you marry someone who weighed a thousand pounds?
It's a given that they aren't going to live a long life so it's making a commitment without really making a commitment. "Til death do us part" isn't that scary of a commitment when you know death is within walking distance.
 

Situation Type Deal Gorl

Fuck your feelings, nancypants
kiwifarms.net
It's a given that they aren't going to live a long life so it's making a commitment without really making a commitment. "Til death do us part" isn't that scary of a commitment when you know death is within walking distance.
I still don't get why anyone would willingly want to become chief ass wiper for some deathfat for however long they managed to hang on to life. It's like me thinking of doing some penance by counting the number of times Big Al does her stupid lipsmacks or says a certain work in her videos.
 

krazy orange cat

Fluffy ball of evil
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
I still don't get why anyone would willingly want to become chief ass wiper for some deathfat for however long they managed to hang on to life. It's like me thinking of doing some penance by counting the number of times Big Al does her stupid lipsmacks or says a certain work in her videos.
Perhaps it depends on the ability to get one of those sweet "no medical exam required" life insurance policies on said deathfat. Paying premiums on one of those would be like playing the lottery except you know that you're going to collect those benefits sooner rather than later.
 

Situation Type Deal Gorl

Fuck your feelings, nancypants
kiwifarms.net
It really doesn't matter if she is embalmed or buried. Either way there will be crazy fees attached to the chemicals/size/space/manpower of either. I would say give her a natural burial. The grass/plants on top would enjoy everlasting life leeching off of Ambers bounty of preservatives.

That'd be one big fucking hole - it has to be both large enough to contain her 600 pound corpse, and deep enough that as she decomposes after being buried, the escaping gases don't cause the soil to heave up.
 
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