What's the Most Autistic Food? - Autfood for Autfags

cawk mcnibbler69^%

I'll judge it off of the standard of what's unhealthy, laughable, and extremely loud (in the way it's marketed.)
Fast Food
Junk Food mainly cheap-plastic-bagged goods like Doritos and Gummy Bears
Foods of companies that support Monsanto like Nabisco and Frito-Lay
Heavily Processed Foods like Hotdogs and Lunch Meat
Peanut Butter and Jelly Sandwiches
Hug Jugs and other Fruit* *fructose artificially-colored Ghetto Fruit Drinks
Instant Oatmeal, Mac & Cheese, Act II Popcorn, and other 'easy prep' foods
White Bread
GMO Foods
Red Lobster, Olive Garden, Coney Islands, and other popular 'restaurants'
Frozen Meals
Shitty and cheap condiments and seasoning, such as Mayonaise, Ketchup, Iodized Salt, Fake Honey, and Frank's Red Hot
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cawk mcnibbler69^%

I'm surprised no one's mentioned Gatorade, it tends to be the drink of slobs with no taste whatsoever.

It's marketed as a fitness drink but its overloaded with sugar, fun fact athletes do drink Gatorade but they dillute it with water because it's overloaded with sugar.

It really blows my mind to see people walking around leisurely drinking gatorade. Yes Coca Cola is also not good for you but at least it objectively tastes good.
BodyArmor Lyte is a lot better. It actually has electrolytes for one thing.
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Preferred pronouns: shit\shits\shitself
Precooked food that would take 5 minutes to make is peak autism. Seeing people buy shit like pre-beaten eggs boggles my mind.

Also honorable mention to gummy bears. I love the stuff but it's always embarrassing to buy because it's always marketed towards kids. We need serious adult gummy candy. And no, gummy dicks don't count
It's okay dude, the original German slogan of Haribo says it makes both children AND adults happy. You can eat your delicious bear-shaped sweets with your pride and dignity intact.
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Sorry, but not sorry!
True & Honest Fan
Eh, you can't really find those anywhere outside of amusement parks, especially Disneyland, anyway.
I can, several gas/food marts just blocks from me have 'em. They sell them out of special freezers like this...


Stairs are my worst enemy
True & Honest Fan
Here’s an update on the Sour Patch Kids ice cream. It’s actually more like a sherbet. The one I tried was a mixture of lemon sherbet and vanilla ice cream with raspberry swirls and Sour Patch candy. It’s pretty tasty if you’re into fruity ice cream with a hint of sour. It’s still an autistic food though, there’s no denying that.


You don't know what hard times are daddy.
Anything featured in one of those bastardized western mukbang videos cause god fucking willing they eat with utensils, proper audio levels on their equipment and don't make you ask yourself "is this was we've become as a race?" if you finish watching.