Why do pigs not fly? -

[stares at error messages]

Can't they buy aeroplane tickets?

 

[Niggernerd]

They do, they're called western tourists

 

[Thumb Butler]

In Spain they are known as "Englishmen".

 

[Tsuka Hiira]

Donkey Kong Land - Wikipedia

en.wikipedia.org

Obligatory mention because boxart has a flying pig. The temple and Kremlantis themes are godlike for Game Boy sound

 

[usernames can change now!]

they do

http://www.bnnbloomberg.ca/an-aviation-tycoon-gets-a-boost-in-pandemic-1.1448121

 

[Dysnomia]

Because you touch yourself at night.

 

[Ghost of Wesley Willis]

Because they're fucking stupid.

 

[JuanButNotForgotten]

According to all known laws
of aviation,


there is no way a bee pig
should be able to fly.


Its wings are too small to get don't exist and can't lift
its fat little body off the ground.


The bee pig, of course, doesn't fliesy anyway


because bees pigs don't care
what humans think is impossible.


Yellow, black. Yellow, black.
Yellow, black. Yellow, black.

PINK PINK PINK PINK
PINK PINK PINK PINK

Ooh, black and yellow PINK!
Let's shake it up a little.


Barry! Breakfast is ready!

 

[Vingle]

Because it's easier to catch them, would be bad if the bacon did fly away.

 

[TFT-A9]

What use would a pig have for flight?

 

[Admiral Mantoid]

Cincinnati’s iconic flying pigs need your help

Iconic statues journey from public art controversy to unofficial city mascot

www.wlwt.com

Won't you do your part to help the flying pigs from going extinct?

 

[The Real SVP]

It's illegal.

 

[Solid Snek]

That's a really good question. I thought the answer would be obvious, but I can't find ANY information online about the legality of animals purchasing plane tickets. I'm sure stuff like that must come up - as, for example, all those cases where cats get left millions of dollars by batshit old lunatics; surely, "the cat", or at least someone connected with the cat's estate, would wind up buying plane tickets at some point? - but I dunno. I really don't know.

That said, YES. A pig CAN fly - if he is an emotional support animal, accompanying a human. Here is an article on that. I don't know if Helper Piggies are still allowed on civilian aircraft post-pandemic, but as of 2019 there were documented cases of pigs flying.

There are also documented cases of livestock pigs being airlifted around the globe, and according to Fox News, shipping pigs via aircraft is a growing industry.

However, as for whether or not pigs can freely and consensually purchase their own airplane tickets - I can't say. I'd like to say that, in the absence of any laws against it, then yes they could. But I think this is a question that we'd need to send to a lawyer, maybe even a dedicated airplane lawyer.

 

[Agent Abe Caprine]

They're lazy.