Wily's Wonderland (2021) - Nicolas Cage as Doom Guy at Five Nights at Freddy's with Viscera Cleanup Detail

[Secret Asshole]

So while browsing YouTube with their stupid rent-a-movies thing, I notice a Nic Cage movie I've never heard of: Wily's Wonderland. Now, I love me some Nic Cage and I did love 'The Color Out of Space". So what is the premise? Nicolas Cage is a lone drifter in a sports car who gets a flat by a spike strip left by teenagers (in reality the town itself) while driving in the boonies. He gets his car towed and it is going to cost 1k for repairs (fucking mechanics are all the same). Unfortunately, this town doesn't take credit cards, has no internet or ATMs and he has to 'work it off'. If that's a bit unbelievable, its because Nicolas Cage's character is actually a ritual sacrifice and all of this is intentional. He has to go and clean Wily's Wonderland, a shit-hole chain restaurant that wants to re-open and has been vandalized and run down. All he has to do is spend the night cleaning it and his car will be ready in the morning. Simple, right?

Well, if you couldn't tell by the title, the animatronics come alive at night and murder the ever living shit out of people.

Bring it on you motherfucker​

Its not exactly a horror movie in the traditional sense, per say. Because Nicolas Cage just is not afraid of fucking anything. He murders and butchers monsters and then fucking cleans them up. He's got a job and evil animatronic monsters aren't going to stop him from doing it. You might wonder why I call Nicolas Cage 'Doom Guy'. Well, because he is unflappable and literally has 0 lines in the entire movie except for screaming and grunting. Yes, a major Hollywood actor doesn't say a fucking thing throughout a film he stars in and its wonderful. The only characterization he gets is that he's a military veteran from the dog tags in his sports car, he likes beer and cars. And that's all we need to know really.

The real question is can Nicolas Cage overact just using facial expressions? The answer is yes, yes he can and it is glorious. This is a pure B-Movie with all the lovely clichés (clueless teenagers, Dutch angle shots, small, isolated town) except for Nicolas Cage is basically a video game character and there's really nothing wrong with that. Its basically throwing Doom Guy into a horror movie and its kind of hilarious to see the different reactions you would get from the typical horror movie clichés of a guy who just doesn't really give a flying fuck.

Are you fucking kidding me, I just cleaned this bathroom goddamnit. It is my birthday tho how did you know​

Its a pretty decent flick and it has no CGI blood or gore or shitty effects. Its Nic Cage beating the ever-living fuck out of monsters and cleaning up a theme restaurant while teenagers get slaughtered. So while it does have the horror movie clichés in there (LOTS of Dutch Angles) and its firm B movie territory, it is a lot of fun. Its probably also the best videogame movie ever made because Nic Cage is strictly silent. I keep mentioning that because it is so strange for a Hollywood actor to be completely silent or like in Dredd, have their face completely hidden for the entire movie.

I enjoyed it for its simplicity. If you're tired of overly pretentious bullshit, I mean, there's nothing pretentious here. You see what you get. Its not trying to be anything more than it is, it firmly knows WHAT it is and I judged it on those merits. Its trashy fun and that is perfectly fine. Also Nic Cage beating the shit out of furries is always a bonus.

 

[Just A Butt]

 

[Namesarehardtocomeupwith]

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Why does he looks like a leaner DSP?

 

[MasterDisaster]

This was a smash hit on movie night.

 

[Coelacanth]

If I remember correctly the original plot involved pedophiles using a ritual to have their souls put into the animatronics for obvious reasons. Instead they went with boring murderhobos. Edgy as fuck, but would've made this film a whole lot more entertainingly insane.

 

[Shining Wit]

Between this and the Banana Splits movie i think the 5 nights well is truly tapped

One thing you can't fault Cage for is being open to weird roles. He did another film semi-recently called Mandy which was just as nuts as this, worth a watch

 

[Very Honest Content]

Mandy and Color Out of Space are some quality late Cage work too, let's get that out of the way right now.

This was a smash hit on movie night.

It's on the "potential Kiwi Klassics" list after only one screening. Next time it plays will probably confirm it being upgraded to the Klassics list proper, with the likes of Foodfight and the feature films of Neil Breen, rightfully so.

Why does he looks like a leaner DSP?

He's getting ready for the biopic is why.

I like to imagine Cage showed up for shooting each day and would tell the director who wanted today to be the day his character would speak on screen dialog that it wasn't going to work for him and he'd stay silent again today instead, and it just kept happening over and over until the movie was wrapped for him and he hadn't said anything but made a couple of guttural shouts during the boss fight scene, then he cashed his check and left for the next movie he had to make to pay alimony this month.

 

[Secret Asshole]

Between this and the Banana Splits movie i think the 5 nights well is truly tapped

One thing you can't fault Cage for is being open to weird roles. He did another film semi-recently called Mandy which was just as nuts as this, worth a watch

I mean, he seems relatively unpretentious and is sort of like Walken where he takes random roles.

Oh, Mandy is fucking amazing.

Mandy and Color Out of Space are some quality late Cage work too, let's get that out of the way right now.

It's on the "potential Kiwi Klassics" list after only one screening. Next time it plays will probably confirm it being upgraded to the Klassics list proper, with the likes of Foodfight and the feature films of Neil Breen, rightfully so.

He's getting ready for the biopic is why.

I like to imagine Cage showed up for shooting each day and would tell the director who wanted today to be the day his character would speak on screen dialog that it wasn't going to work for him and he'd stay silent again today instead, and it just kept happening over and over until the movie was wrapped for him and he hadn't said anything but made a couple of guttural shouts during the boss fight scene, then he cashed his check and left for the next movie he had to make to pay alimony this month.

Its actually funny, because I know the rules of the union. If you speak, they have to pay you more. Which is why extras don't get to improv. There's a clip from 'Being John Malkovich' where he gets beaned in the head with a beer can and the extra shouts, 'Hey Malkovich, think fast!'. They had to pay the extra $600 more because he now had a speaking role.

Since Nic Cage doesn't speak, they can pay him less and hence keep the budget down. Of course, your way is the funnier way. Nic Cage was also a producer on this film as well, so I wouldn't be shocked if it was his decision too.

 

[Suburban Bastard]

Any picture worthy Nic Cage faces come out of it?

 

[The Mass Shooter Ron Soye]

One thing you can't fault Cage for is being open to weird roles. He did another film semi-recently called Mandy which was just as nuts as this, worth a watch

I mean, he seems relatively unpretentious and is sort of like Walken where he takes random roles.

I think it comes down to Cage having debt problems, so he'll take as much work as he can get, and being seen as a goofball. The more the merrier though.

 

[Secret Asshole]

I think it comes down to Cage having debt problems, so he'll take as much work as he can get, and being seen as a goofball. The more the merrier though.

Well, to be fair, the debt problems weren't his fault. He lost all his money to Maddof, its not like he was splurging. He was saving it but his investor put it in with him and then it all got stolen.

 

[Idiotron]

This was a smash hit on movie night.

Was it?
I thought it was boring as fuck and it looked like crap.
It was so bad that I went to check this director's IMDB and his highest rated movie prior to this one is 4.6, I think.
I think I've said it before but, if Cage wasn't in it, everybody would see it for the piece of shit that it is but "OMG! IT'S THE CAGEMASTER! THE CAGE RAGE!" and all of a sudden, people get fooled into thinking this movie is fun.

I think it comes down to Cage having debt problems, so he'll take as much work as he can get, and being seen as a goofball. The more the merrier though.

No, he paid it off already, he's rich again.

 

[The tired cat]

The most fun part about this movie is that Nic agreed to play it because he didn't have any lines, he seriously liked the idea of playing a silent protagonist and only having body language.

 

[Sam Losco]

Here's the trailer:

"He's not trapped in here with them! They're trapped in here with him!" LOL

 

[PuffyGroundCloud]

ngl, this is one of the great Nic Cage movie.

 

[Crazedking]

Well, to be fair, the debt problems weren't his fault. He lost all his money to Maddof, its not like he was splurging. He was saving it but his investor put it in with him and then it all got stolen.

Whats this maddof thing? i thought his debt problems was because he spent money on random stupid shit like dinosaur fossils and expensive artsy shit.

 

[Secret Asshole]

Whats this maddof thing? i thought his debt problems was because he spent money on random stupid shit like dinosaur fossils and expensive artsy shit.

Whoops, I was thinking of Kevin Bacon

 

[UnKillShredDur]

This was just a shitty film version of the popular video game: Six Days in Fallujah I mean Five Nights at Freddy's.

 

[The Lawgiver]

This was just a shitty film version of the popular video game: Six Days in Fallujah I mean Five Nights at Freddy's.

Yes but Unlike Five Nights at Freddy's Nicolas cage beats the shit out of the demon-posessed murderbot mascots.
It's always been weird to me how like when you lose in that game it's just implied the MC just sits there and takes it without a struggle. You'd think he'd just go "fuck it" and beat on the animatronics after night 4 where the fucking day shift guy gets cornered and killed by them while he's trying to leave a message for you. At least HE clearly had some sort of struggle. He had all of them rushing him at once which kinda is a bit more believable on the "you will die" scale of going up against clunky ass demon ghost robots.
(Day shift guy dying is also why every fucking game thats come out after the first FNAF has been a prequel no matter how little sense it makes )

 

[Dom Cruise]

I bet kids who were really scared by FNAF really got a kick out of watching Nicolas Cage beat up what scares them, it’d be like if I saw him beating up Chucky as a kid.