I would go with Sandra Lee. The Kwanzaa Cake still hurts my mind.
Worst Celebrity Cooks -
- Thread starter Takayuki Yagami
- Start date
Isn't she that "semi-homemade" fuckwit, or is that someone else?
Yup, I'm amazed the Governor of New York hasn't gotten poisoned yet.
I love Aunt Sandy. She gets trashed by 6 pm and fucks up dinner so you just have pizza instead. I love her attempts at ethnic food.
COCKTAIL TIME!!!
I almost hate to say it, but Guy Fieri isn't even a cook any more. I remember the first season of Food Network Star when my family and I were all really rooting for him to win. He started out really fun to watch, his cooking show was good, and Triple D was actually not annoying at first. Now he's just a dude that appears to be trapped in a 90's time vortex who gets paid to eat. Guy, stop. You've gained 40 pounds, you have six kinds of diabeetus, you sweat butter. It's time to come home from Flavortown.
If people from Food Network Challenge count, does anyone remember Stevie Famulari? She was a total nutbar who's cakes were gross and weird at best and downright horrifying and dangerous at worst. Kerry Vincent was a frequent judge on the show, and was VERY prim and proper with a bit of Simon Cowell in her judging. If your fondant covering looked like dogshit she would not hesitate to tell you. This didn't work with the artsy, free-spirited, "I drink my paint thinner" Stevie Famulari.
She appeared on an episode where the contestents were supposed to make a cake for a secret person. That person? Kerry Vincent. Oh the shit that would go down. Rather then describe the literally flaming hot mess that this deranged woman vomited forth, let the picture speak for itself.
IT WAS LEGITIMATLY ON FIRE AT SOME POINT OF THE SHOW. THAT'S FOAM FROM A FIRE EXTINGUISHER.
If people from Food Network Challenge count, does anyone remember Stevie Famulari? She was a total nutbar who's cakes were gross and weird at best and downright horrifying and dangerous at worst. Kerry Vincent was a frequent judge on the show, and was VERY prim and proper with a bit of Simon Cowell in her judging. If your fondant covering looked like dogshit she would not hesitate to tell you. This didn't work with the artsy, free-spirited, "I drink my paint thinner" Stevie Famulari.
She appeared on an episode where the contestents were supposed to make a cake for a secret person. That person? Kerry Vincent. Oh the shit that would go down. Rather then describe the literally flaming hot mess that this deranged woman vomited forth, let the picture speak for itself.
IT WAS LEGITIMATLY ON FIRE AT SOME POINT OF THE SHOW. THAT'S FOAM FROM A FIRE EXTINGUISHER.
I found my favorite Aunt Sandy clip.
Two shots of vodka. *pours a cup actually*
You know she insists on film cocktail time first.
Are you sure this isn't a badly decayed cadaver?
You know she insists on film cocktail time first.
Are you sure this isn't a badly decayed cadaver?
Yaoi Zowie
kiwifarms.net
Terrible as a cake, but very nice as a diorama of one of the hell levels in the new Doom game.
Paula Deen. Stupid racist hick.
Today I go to a dive bar painted in racecar red to try their famous pulled pork nachos!
This is Guy Fieri, and I'm rolling out!
This is Guy Fieri, and I'm rolling out!
Instant rice plus canned and frozen everything.
Sandra Lee is the reason why Tumblr hates it when white people cook ethnic food.
Anne Burell. She's just a bitch. Her third time competing on Chopped she pushed a food stand off her table so she could have more room. She told one of"students" on Worst Cooks in America to smile while they were doing a challenge and trying to focus. She wouldn't leave them alone and then yelled at them when they got confused. She's terrible on Beat Bobby Flay and has the same problem of harassing competitors (not counting Flay).
I'll give her one credit. She can actually cook.
I'll give her one credit. She can actually cook.
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Honestly, Sandra Lee's cocktails aren't horrible.
Boozey as all hell, but they're competent.
Oh, wait. Her show is about making food and not drinking during the day time?
Boozey as all hell, but they're competent.
Oh, wait. Her show is about making food and not drinking during the day time?
She once made a cocktail with lemonade and half-and-half, the acid curdles milk. She clearly didn't make the cocktail before filming the episode it was on because she took a sip and tried to suppress a cringe. Still better than trying to act like blue berries floating in Hpnotiq will impress your guest.
Fanny Cradock.
Here's her making a mincemeat (as in the stuff you put in mince pies) omelette:
And here's the career ending incident where she pretended to vom at the fare of the woman who won Cook of the Realm (a Masterchef precursor):
Just remember, boys and girls - if you follow the recipe correctly, your upside-down cakes will look just like Fanny's!
Here's her making a mincemeat (as in the stuff you put in mince pies) omelette:
And here's the career ending incident where she pretended to vom at the fare of the woman who won Cook of the Realm (a Masterchef precursor):
Just remember, boys and girls - if you follow the recipe correctly, your upside-down cakes will look just like Fanny's!
Martha Stewart, for never ever being seen to mix anything with her hands, even when it is optimal to do so.
Those US TV cooks who never taste anything during cooking because 'food safety'.
Valentine Warner for being a cock
Those US TV cooks who never taste anything during cooking because 'food safety'.
Valentine Warner for being a cock
That dumb wop from the Cake Boss show. He bugs the crap out of me for some reason.
What's going on with that lady's eyebrows. I've seen better on cholas.
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